Have you ever heard the phrase “don’t fall into the comparison trap”? We’ve all heard this phrase before, but is it
actually possible to avoid? And why do they call it a trap? I have so many
questions, few answers, and merely experiences to draw upon. So, let’s discuss
what we can.
First, let me remind you that there
is no one like you and we need the best version of you while we’re here!
1. the act of comparing. 2. the
state of being compared. 3. a likening; illustration by similitude; comparative
estimate or statement.
What the heck is a comparative
estimate? Ha! That’s enough to make me want to quit before I begin. It seems
like comparison is all about measuring up to something created by some unknown
person for some undefined reason. Comparison is like a dare to perform against
some mysterious, unrealistic standard. YUCK! Not only does it seem like you’re playing a
game that’s stacked against you, but it’s as if the rules of play don’t exist.
That may be why they call it a trap; comparison confuses you and then you just
fall into it.
I have found that comparison shines
a spotlight on what I don’t have, casting what I do have to the shadows.
Comparison usually wounds more than
it heals.
Comparison is most often weighed on
unbalanced scales.
If you will allow me to be
completely transparent with you-- comparison becomes a struggle for me when the
boundary lines of my life get blurred. Comparison so easily turns into
judgement which quickly turns into competition which leads me to become a
warrior woman, determined to prove myself, but come on! There are plenty of
other things more worthy of my time and energy. Yet I still fall into the trap.
UGH! Does this sound at all familiar to you?
So what is it that drives you and me
to compare? For me, it can come from a lack of thankfulness. Comparison can
enter when I take my eyes off of the most important things, choosing to focus
on trivial matters. Other times comparison is fueled by feelings of inadequacy
based on assumptions or actions of others.
There can be many triggers for
comparison, but I’ve only found one remedy: contentment. Let’s return to dictionary.com to see what it says about contentment:
Let’s try to find contentment today and every
day, shall we?
That sounds pretty great, right? But in order
to find contentment, we first have to do some self-assessment. Are you ready?
It begins with answering this question: What satisfies you the most? I would
love to hear your answer, be sure to comment below (remember that you can
comment anonymously).
For me, there is no greater satisfaction than when I have the
opportunity to serve those who have nothing to give in return. It’s more than
doing a good thing or “scratching the good deed itch”; I am the most satisfied
when I’m living a life of generosity. This way of life opens the door to
another beautiful part of contentment that we will talk about very soon.
There is a lot to “live up to” these days and
if that is our sole focus, at the end of the day, I think we will be sorely
disappointed. True contentment is not found in things but in living everyday
fully aware and full of hope of the future.
I want to leave you with this beautiful quote
that I’ve found to be absolutely true:
“I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life
was service. I acted and behold, service was joy.” ― Rabindranath Tagore
I hope that this inspires you to take today
and live well. Then repeat tomorrow!
See you next Tuesday!
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