Saturday, July 18, 2015

Abortion Debate: Here's what I want to say

That couple above is my high school sweetheart and me on our wedding day.

June 20, 1998.

We had a lot of dreams when that picture was taken, but by far, the biggest dream was the dream that many couples share.

We had a dream to have children.

Right now, our media is abuzz on the topic of abortion. Every now and then something pops up, people get outraged, and the debate picks up heat. 

But I'm not here to debate abortion.

Instead, what I want to discuss is that couple in the picture above. 

Five years after they were married, they were told that it was unlikely they would ever conceive a child without intense medical intervention.

They did everything the doctors told them to do, and five years later, they were exactly where they started.



And then, they received a phone call.

And it is this phone call that I want to spend this post discussing.

This phone call was from a young woman who was in the midst of her own debate. She was young. She was unmarried. And she was pregnant. 

As she sat in the doctor's office, her physician said to her, "You have a choice."

And this woman replied with complete certainty the words that changed the life of that couple pictured above forever. 

She said, "I have made my choice."

She chose to see that pregnancy to a delivery room. And that choice meant that she had to drop out of school. She had to miss out on her senior year of high school. She had to endure sickness and stretch marks and weight gain and the pain of delivery.

But she chose to do it.

That little boy is now seven years old. 

Isaac John is real. He is a beautiful and amazing little boy who gave my husband and I the family we always dreamed of.

But the facts still remain that countless women in the U.S. choose abortion over adoption for their unborn babies every year. (Click here to read an article by Kristi Brown discussing this topic.) Most women want to keep their baby or get rid of their baby immediately. Adoption is not an option. Adoption statistics are not easy to track, but estimates are that for every 1 baby placed into a loving home, 36 more families are still waiting.

Now I want you to meet someone else.

This is my cousin, Ryan, and his wife, Briana.

They are in the same spot that my husband and I found ourselves in eight years ago.

They have not been able to have a biological child and are dreaming of a family. They have raised all of the money to adopt and are simply waiting for a birth mom to choose them.

They have now been waiting over a year. While estimates vary greatly, most research indicates that while they have been waiting for a baby, over 984,000 babies in the U.S. alone have been aborted.

Almost 1 million.

I'm not here today to discuss the ethics of abortion. I am not here to argue whether it is right or wrong. You can decide that for yourself.

But what I am here to argue is that baby inside of your womb is a child many couples dream of. And whether you believe life begins at conception or whether a woman has the right to choose is really not what is at the crux of this issue.

The one thing that no one can deny is that that what is in your womb WILL result in a baby if that baby is not aborted. What is in your womb right now WILL be life ... even if you don't believe it is a life right now.

And so today, all I ask is that you look at the picture of Ryan and Briana and see what your decision can mean for someone else. 

Look at the picture of my husband and I on our wedding day. And see who we are today ... because of one woman's choice.

If you would like help support a couple trying to raise money to adopt, please visit our website at: to find out how you can make a difference today.


Anonymous said...

This brought tears in my eyes... I wish your cousin the best.

Anonymous said...

I am pro choice, but I very much enjoyed this perspective. So many blog posts, articles, etc. that are written by pro life authors are very polarizing (i.e. using words like "murder") and judgmental, but this post was not like that at all. Instead of saying negative things about those who have chosen or are considering abortion, it put a human face on adoption that someone might not otherwise see. In other words, instead of being anti choice, it was pro adoption. Great post.

Wendi Kitsteiner said...

Anonymous, than you. This is exactly what I wanted the post to be. I have many, many Christian and non-Christian friends alike who have had abortions, and I have seen many sides of it. But what I truly feel the most about it is that, we, as a country, need to be HELPING these mothers SEE what the options are. Many feel like there are not any options. I cannot imagine being young, unmarried, and broke, and thinking about bringing a life into the world. But if I realized what that life could mean for someone else, it would be a whole different story!