Special Friend

Thursday was a good day. Not only did I have a chance to have lunch with my "Hearts like Hannah" group (and learn about the death of spinach), which I always enjoy, but I got to have a good online chat with a good friend/relative. I won't reveal his/her identity in order not to make him/her feel uncomfortable or put on the spot. However, this person said some really powerful things, and I wanted to share them.

This blog isn't only for other people to read. It has become an online journal of sorts, and I often go looking back and remember where I was or wasn't at a particular time. So if you don't care what this person had to say, that's okay. I cared a lot. It was exactly what I needed.

In the course of our infertility journey, I have often said that even if you aren't going through this (i.e., infertility), you can probably relate to being disappointed with something in your life that isn't going the way you had planned. The loss of a dream person, a dream job, or just a dream in general can knock you off your platform and throw you for a loop.

So what did my dear friend/family member may be a girl or may be a boy tell me yesterday? Well I kept his/her words and wanted to share them. Don't worry anonymous person, only JB and I know who you are. And JB's response when I shared this with him? "Wow, I didn't know ___ was so deep!"

When I look at yours and John's situation ... it's exciting! I talk to people everyday whose marriages are falling apart and have such family issues that it's sad. Your desire to have a child and children is your pursuit of happiness and you think it will completely fulfill you. I'm not going to say that your struggle to conceive is not sad, because we hurt with you ... however, you are learning through these four years as I had to go through over the last years that GOD WILL DIRECT YOU AND GET YOU TO A PLACE WHERE YOU HAVE A PURPOSE ... will I ever be happy again? Heck yeah you will ... it may or may not be through MY original plan but it may be through a new plan (God's plan). It's exciting because you have so much ahead of you ...

Wendi, your next cycle may or may not be positive ...and you may or may not have your "own" child ... however, the two of you have the opportunity to do great things -- who knows what God will put in your lap and when he will do it? It may come from your belly, it may come from somewhere else ... but the two of you are called to do great things and that's exciting. There's no reason at this point to say you're giving up ... DOWN THE ROAD the Lord may lead you to take a different route or option, possibly adoption. Who knows what it's store ... that's what can either cause us anxiety or keep us cheerfully waiting! When you find something to put your heart and soul into, the time you spend doing these things kinda take your restless mind off of the issues that cause a downward spiral.

Thanks special friend. No, you didn't preach at me. You said exactly what I needed to hear. And I believe this is not just something I need to hear. I believe it is something a lot of us need to hear.

We go to the doctor at 8:00 this morning. We will be discussing a lot of things with him, and I will update you later today.

God will make a way

Where there seems to be no way

He works in ways we cannot see

He will make a way for me

He will be my guide

Hold me closely to His side

With love and strength

For each new day

He will make a way

He will make a way

By a roadway in the wilderness

He'll lead me

And rivers in the desert will I see

Heaven and earth will fade

But His Word will still remain

He will do something new today

God will make a way