Yesterday Isaac and I walked into a gas station to get a little snack. I often try to find time to take just one child out and yesterday was my "date" with Isaac. A woman behind the counter who had her own unique physical features which I won't write about in fear of surrounding rude, gave me a nice long stare up and down when I walked in.
Keep in mind that Isaac is adopted while you read this. Sort of an important side note.
I will let my quote marks tell the rest of the story.
Lady behind the counter: "Wow. Are you going to be tall like your mommy?"
Isaac: "Ummm ..."
Lady behind the counter: "She's really tall. Are you going to be tall like her?"
Isaac: "Ummm ..."
Lady behind the counter: "What about your daddy? How tall is he?"
Isaac: "He's as tall as Mommy."
Lady behind the counter: "Well you are going to be very tall then."
Isaac: "Okay." (Looks at me and scrunches up his nose.)
Lady behind the counter: (Turns to me now.) "I bet you were a basketball player?"
Me: "I was."
Lady behind the counter: "Yeah, because you are very tall."
Me: "Okay."
Lady behind the counter: (Gives a long whistle.) "I thought my brother was tall. But you got him beat."
Me: "Okay."
Lady behind the counter: "Well I guess you can reach things on the top shelf?"
Me: "Yes I can."
Even though I am 38-years-old I continue to always feel at a loss for words when this happens. Anything I say to stop the conversation from moving forward will come out rude. But I am trying, with every piece of my body language, to indicate that I am uncomfortable with this discussion.
And she just ... kept ... going.
I went to the van and ate my candy bar in peace and thought of all the things I wanted to say.
Do you play miniature golf?
How's the weather down there?
How short are you?
How short is your husband?
Well at least you reach stuff easier on the floor.
Were you a gymnast or a horse jockey?
4 comments:
I feel ya. Even though you know this is an ignorant person who's mother didn't teach them manners, you still feel the sting of someone pointing out that you are different. I had a little old man say, "hey stretch" while I was just trying to get a pop at burger king. I jsut smiled a him because my mother taught me manners. I forced myself to blow it off, although it took my heart a couple of minutes. I sat there eating my lunch with Andrew and reminded myself how much I like being me. It didn't take long to release it. I love me, and so do a lot of other people. Aunt Linda
That is something....shows how people really do NOT think sometimes! I'm about 5'10" and I used to get that basketball question alot when I was younger?! UGH!
I'm only 5'8" (I'm female) so I can't say I get these comments myself. But I will say that the person was clearly not insulting you...being tall is not a disability or anything to cause you embarrassment should it be pointed out to you. So if she was saying "wow you're really fat!" or "gosh you have horrible acne and you look terrible!" then she would be a total jerk. I honestly think she was trying to be friendly and was simply talking about something you already know that is not rude to mention. Almost like talking about a shirt you are wearing. Most people wish they were taller than they are!
I think sometimes we (myself included) are too quick to be offended by innocent remarks.
I was not offended. I was annoyed. I also think that it isn't fair that height is allowed to be ogled. We are taught it isn't nice to stare and I think this should apply to thibgs we see as positive. I get these comments many times a day and I don't think they are appropriate.
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