I love that JB works in the ER. But I do not love that he has to work a lot of Sundays. Going to church by myself with all four kids is soooo much work. I feel like from the moment I wake up on Sunday I am preparing to try to get us all out the door with everything we need and back home without losing my mind.
I should note that I am well organized. I have everything ready to go. The kids are well behaved. It's just that I still have to maneuver four little people out the door, looking half-way decent, and see them to their classes, and check on their behavior, and gather all the things they drew and brought, and then get us all back in the car, back in the house, and back into play clothes.
It's a lot for JB and I when we do it together.
By myself it just feels like the load is too big.
I'm not sure what to do about it. I'm not sure how to fix it. It's just so exhausting, despite how good the kids are. I feel like I am just crabby and short with everyone, and I can't help but thinking, "Is this worth it?" I know church is important, but I'm just not sure I can do this every week without my husband with me.
I know I am not the first wife to face church alone -- either because her husband is deployed, working, or not a Christian.
If anyone has some encouragement for me, I'd love to have it. I'm weary right now, and debating just throwing in the towel and only going to church when JB is off -- at least until the kids are a bit older.