Thursday, July 08, 2010

Boy Mom

I always thought I was more of a boy mom than a girl mom. I grew up a tomboy, an athlete. What would I do with a little girl who wanted to take ballet and play dress-up?

But having boys has made me realize that I am not exactly sure how to be a boys' mom either. What do you do with matchbox cars? I mean, am I the only one who isn't sure what exactly a little boy is doing when they are pushing them around and lining them up? Thank goodness my Uncle Ed gave me the idea about lining them up in a row. That is a fun thing to do. I like that. The boys like that.

I do like the Thomas train tracks. I enjoy setting them up and being a bit creative in what kind of track I make. JB wants to build a train table when we get to Turkey. He suggested gluing the tracks down. I was aghast! Gluing them down? That's my favorite part of playing trains. What would my role be in our playtime if they were glued down?

Today Elijah and I pushed a car back and forth to each other for nearly a half hour. It was the first time we were able to do it without delays due to Elijah pushing it in the wrong direction. He really got it. He was giggling and laughing hysterically. This was a pretty fun game to me.

A lot of people tell me they aren't sure how to be a parent or an aunt or an uncle. That they don't know what to do with a kid.

I grew up with little kids. I babysat. I worked in the nursery. I hung out with Brianna all the time.

And even me, a pretty big veteran of children, is a bit lost when it comes to getting on the floor and playing with my boys.

But I have realized that it doesn't matter what I do or how I play. If I am just lying or sitting on the floor, they will make their own fun. They will climb on my back. They will wrestle me. They will bring me a book. They will push me a car. They will just come sit next to me with their cars and begin pushing them around. They just want to be near you.

Today, while I was checking my email at 5:45 this morning (Elijah keeps getting up that early! I have no idea why!), he brought some cars and just stood next to me, pushing them around the desk.

You don't have to know what you are doing to love someone. Just do your best.

And, if anyone can help me be a better matchbox car player, I'm totally open to suggestions.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I also wasn't sure how to be a mom to a boy. I only have a sister. My son also loved Thomas the train and we had a train track kit where it gave many different diagrams of different tracks to make. I hated pushing the trains around but I loved making tracks. My suggestion is to not make a train table as it limits your creativity. Yes, it does contain the pieces but we had tracks going over couches, under tables and from the living room and dining room.

nurseclubx said...

I absolutely love this post! I was worried about being a mommy to my little boy, but now I am so glad he is who he is! So much fun!

Thelma said...

'You don't have to know what you are doing to love someone. Just do your best.'

That made me tear up... beautiful. And so true!

Nancy, Jeremy, and Jack said...

You are exactly right Wendi- just being present and loving!

Anonymous said...

Not sure I ever bought into that whole "Boy/Girl Mom" thing. I loved putting ribbons in Madeline's hair just as much as I loved going out of my way so Evan could see the firetrucks at the firestation.

Sounds to me like you're doing a fantastic job playing with your boys.

Love,
Linda

Monkey Momma said...

Wendi, I loved this post about now knowing how to play with boys. I sooo get it! I'm about to take the leap to being a SAHM in another month and I've often wondered the same thing: Can I play well with them?

I needed to hear what you have to say. Thank you. I need to just be present. And in my current situation I am not able to do that with the regularity they need. Thank you for yet another confirmation that my decision is right. (Even if it scares the bejesus out of me to not have my paycheck.) 8-L

Monkey Momma said...

Wendi, I loved this post about now knowing how to play with boys. I sooo get it! I'm about to take the leap to being a SAHM in another month and I've often wondered the same thing: Can I play well with them?

I needed to hear what you have to say. Thank you. I need to just be present. And in my current situation I am not able to do that with the regularity they need. Thank you for yet another confirmation that my decision is right. (Even if it scares the bejesus out of me to not have my paycheck.) 8-L