Moments

JB stopped home during lunch today. This never happens. Okay, so it has happened, um, maybe three times in three years. Enough to make never an inaccurate description. But I think you see where I am going with this. It rarely happens. And even today, it wasn't to eat or stay for any length of time. It was to pick up something he forgot.

He only stayed for a matter of minutes, but as he plopped down on the couch and Isaac and Elijah began crawling all over him mere moments before I put them down for their joint afternoon nap, he asked me the question.

You know the question. We all ask it of our housemates mere moments after coming in the door. It's what you do. You say, "So, what did you do today?"

And as JB asked me this during our few surprise minutes together this afternoon, I found myself beginning to rattle off a list of things and events and . . . I realized, moments. This is what my day is now. It is moments. It is a series of images and quips that I wish I often had the time to write down or take a photo of.

Some people say that being a mom is the hardest job in the world. I can't say I totally agree. I especially didn't agree when I just had Isaac. I was a teacher and a coach and worked 70-80 hours a week for five years of my life. Residents. They have hard jobs. Farmers. You get my point. There are many jobs that are hard. Not to say that being a mom is easy. And having two boys is definitely rivaling some of the hardest jobs.

No, it isn't that this is the hardest job in the world. But it's that the job of motherhood doesn't bring in the pats on the back that a district championship does. I don't receive a paycheck mid-month to remind me why I am here. No student rewards me with a Christmas gift or principal with a glowing work report. There are no tests to make or grades to compile or cafeteria to monitor.

This job isn't harder. It's just different. I'm raising men. I'm supposed to be keeping the house running and tackling any little thing that comes my way, all the while raising little boys to become succesful men. And it's different because at the end of the day, my list of things that I did doesn't feel very long. Maybe that day I didn't go anywhere. I didn't call anyone. I didn't technically accomplish anything that seems important to recount to JB when he asks.

And yet my day is so full. I tell JB that this is the first time I have sat down. That I ate my breakfast walking around. And yet when trying to recount what I did that day, I can't come up with very many things. I realize instead that my day hasn't been full of activities. It has been filled with moments. Today, while both boys are napping, I thought I would recount those moments. I wish I could do this everyday so that I could capture in words how quickly they are growing up.

Here are today's moments, of which, when I think about it, I am very proud. These are moments that actually occurred, today, December 7, 2009. This was what I did today. Well, before nap time anyway.

• Tiptoeing into the boys' room as quietly as possible to snag Elijah from his crib and allow Isaac to keep sleeping.
• Elijah squinting in the light when I put him down in the morning to get his diaper changed.
• Trying to suction out Elijah's nose and change his diaper while attempting to prevent him from rolling over and trying to crawl right off the changing table.
• Giving Elijah a bottle on the couch while he holds onto my forearm with his chubby little fingers.
• Watching Elijah sitting on the floor, chewing on one of his favorite toys only to see him get so distracted by his chewing that he falls over.
• Elijah pulling on the gate when I try to slip into the kitchen for just a minute to clean some bottles or empty the dishwasher.
• Me giving in and opening the gate so that he can join me in the kitchen even though I know it will mean more work for me -- trying to watch him while I do a few chores.
• Saying a prayer of thanks that he is okay when I look down and see Elijah has pulled one of the cords out of the wall in the kitchen. (This is why he isn't supposed to be in the kitchen when my attention is diverted I remind myself.)
• Feeding Elijah baby food and laughing when he does his dramatic little "I'm all done -- quit putting stuff in my mouth" cry.
• Snuggling with Elijah on the couch and giggling as he sucks on my upper arm inbetween snuggle bouts.
• Fake cries. Elijah is FULL of them. Where did he get this dramatic side from anyway?! (No comments Dad or Mom.)
• Hearing Isaac on the monitor talking away. He went to sleep with Curious George, one of his new favorites last night, and I can hear him repeating his name over and over and over again. "Dorge. Dorge. Dorge."
• Switching the kids out. Scooping Isaac out of his bed and putting Elijah in his own. Isaac is up and Eljiah is ready for a nap. Thankful for this morning time where I often get my only individual time with each boy.
• Isaac handing me back his milk cup and saying, "Orm. Orm. Orm." Daddy started this. Warmed it up for him one time and created a warm-milk-monster. Okay little man. I'll "orm" it up for you.
• Returning to the microwave five minutes later when the "orm-ness" has worn off so that I can "orm" it some more.
• Watching Isaac race to find a car to play with when I tell him it is time for breakfast. He never wants to be in his highchair without a car to play with to break up the monotony.
• Reading Isaac books on the couch and loving the way he strokes my forearm while I read. Six books he takes down before he decides he wants to take a break to pull on Scrubs' tail.
• Elijah wakes up! Time for fun x 2.
• Seeing Isaac's excitement when he puts on the new shoes I bought him at the consignment shop over the weekend. Both boys are in the same size now, and we have a gap in the hand-me-downs, so I needed some size 6's. Isaac doesn't seem to care at all that some other little boy wore them before he did. I have tons of 5's and tons of 7's but no 6's. Three great pairs at the consignment shop do the trick!
• Watching the boys through the "windows" in the cover of my jogger while I attempt to get some exercise after this cold I am finally getting over. Fifty degrees. Can you get better running weather?
• Listening to Isaac sob when our park visit is cut short by some workers who need to lay more recycled tires.
• Watching Elijah mastering walking with shoes on the driveway as he and Isaac "take turns" with the grocery cart and little bike.
• Spending ten minutes picking "owies" (as Keenan calls them) off of Elijah after he ventured into the grass before I could divert him. Man that kid is getting fast. And man those stickers hurt like the dickens!
• The woes of the park are quickly forgotten by the fun in the driveway. But quickly replaced by more woes when it is time to go in for lunch. Isaac truly would like to be outside all day long. He would be if I let him.
• Lunch time. Thanks to motherhood, I am now a pro at cutting apples, bananas, cheese, and even grapes into appropriate sizes.
• Bath time. I try to do baths earlier in the day if I can to eliminate the evening hustle and bustle.
• Today's bath includes, nothing new, me returning Elijah to a seated position over and over and over again. Seventeen times I believe. Does anyone have any tricks for getting a kid to sit down in the bath? Isaac never did this. I used to read while he took a bath. I've tried spankings. Tried raising my voice. Tried everything. He just looks at me, a feeling of great success spread across his face that he can reach the faucet or the shampoo bottles, and smiles. Sigh . . .
• Allowing my two naked boys to run to their rooms and celebrating that this system has not yet resulted in an accident, only to turn and see Isaac peeing on the floor and not understanding why I am a bit flustered by this.
• Nap time! Quiet time! As much as I love my boys I relish the 1-2 hours that their naps overlap in the afternoon. Elijah has just woken up so I'll cut my moment list short.

Tomorrow there will be new moments, and maybe someday in the future, I'll take the time to write them down again. I really do love my job. And it isn't an adopted or a biological son that makes it my job. It is having a little life depend on you for everything they do throughout the day. It is them wanting to be with you at all times. It is telling Elijah not to open the broiler one more time. It's reading Isaac the same book nine times in a row. It's Elijah sucking on my arm again, right now, while I try to type the last few sentences of this post.

Moments. Mom moments. I waited a long time to have them. And I am doing my best to enjoy every single one of them.