Saturday, September 16, 2006

Tara's New Adventure



I hate to make fun of people.

It’s truly not in my nature.

But today, Tara Arness said the funniest thing I can remember hearing from anyone in recent history. I don’t want to believe that me retelling the story is making fun of her. Maybe it is. However, sometimes, things are just too good to pass up.

I preface this story by telling you that Tara knows I am posting this blog. After the laughter died down, and I was able to get my breath, I asked Tara for permission to share the story with you.

She said I could as long as I then asked my loyal blog readers to pipe in. You’ll have to read through the whole blog to ascertain what it is Tara needs piping for, but the picture that started this blog revealed a clue. However, don't worry. No more trivia. It will become quickly obvious. I beg of you to be honest and don’t let me sway you whatsoever.

Okay. The scene.

We are on our way to Deorah. (We did end up going to Decorah. I’ll blog about our trip and provide some pictures later. But for now … I must stick to important points.) We are on the road in the middle of some farmland. JB and I are in the front seat of the car. Tara is in the backseat with Cole and Hunter.

“Oh,” Tara said. “I had an interesting experience yesterday at my bank.” She pauses. We wait for her to go on. “My bank has a drive thru!"

JB and I look at each other. Of course they have a drive thru. What is she talking about?

Tara goes on. "And they had these interesting tubes that they use to shoot things back and forth.”

At this point, JB and I begin studying each other, searching for what we should say. Surely Tara isn’t talking about the tubes that carry your money and checks from your car to the banker. Surely she is about to make some sort of joke.

But we were wrong. Tara goes on. “These tubes are the coolest things. Have you guys seen how these things work? I had no idea what to do. So the woman explained that I just put my check inside, hit the button, and the check would zip right to her.”

Tara, twenty-four-year-old Tara, had never used a drive-thru at a bank. Twenty-four-year-old Tara had also never used a tube system at a bank. Scratch that. She had never even seen a tube system at a bank.

Now I must pause briefly for a quick moment of digression. I understand that some of you have never met Tara so I feel it important to pause to make one point clear. Tara is NOT an airhead. The girl is an accomplished pianist and flute player who got in to Mayo Clinic. She is, honestly, brilliant. And I don't care if she is mad that I posted that. And no, Tara, you don't have to tell everyone that it is not true.

John and I couldn’t help it. We started laughing so hard. Cole and Hunter then started laughing just as loud. Not only had all four of used (or watched our parents use in the case of Cole and Hunter) the tubes at the bank more times than we could remember, we can remember using these when we were very young.

Tara couldn’t believe it. “You mean,” she started. “These are not a new invention?”

We explained that they were so un-not-new that John could recall when he was a kid, having a lollipop come back in the chute when he was in the passenger seat with his mom. (At this point Tara made a joke about how old JB and I are, however, I will skip that in order to save time.)

“Well,” said Tara, in order to defend herself. “You guys grew up in Fort Lauderdale. I must just be a small town girl.”

It was at this moment that we passed a tiny bank in the tiny town of Decorah complete with its own tube system. It was at this moment that JB and I reflected in our three years in the tiny town of Franklin (population 8,000). Our bank there? Tube system.

We tried to think of other reasons. “Were the banks you used in downtown areas?” John asked. Our downtown bank does not have a drive-thru. Surely this was the reason for her lack of experience in this area.

No, they weren’t.

“Did you never drive around the back of your bank?”

Yes, Tara said. She had. Her previous banks had never had a tube system. (We aren’t going to even comment on the fact that Tara has been using the same bank in Rochester for three years and this was still the first time that she has ever put anything in a tube.)

Okay, so here’s where you come in. Tara says that surely, she cannot be the only person in the world who did not know about tube systems at drive-thru’s at banks. So please. Post a comment. I am not telling you which side to pick. However, I must admit, the fact that I am posting this blog makes me feel quite confident in which side you will pick.

* * * * *

The "cash carrier" invention sent money in little tubes traveling by air compression from location to location in a department store so that change could be made. The first device was patented (patent # 165,473) by D. Brown. The date? July 13, 1875.

The first documented genuine pneumatic tube (like we know today) was officially issued to Samuel Clegg and Jacob Selvan. In 1940!

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

What! There's tubes at banks that suck your money away?!! I also saw a newspaper article that said Man On Moon. I was like, "No way....we landed on the moon!"

Anonymous said...

As I sat in the drive thru line at the bank just the other day, I thought how glad I was that someone thought of this idea and how lazy its probably made me. Then I wondered just how long they've been around, since they've been around FOR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER, lol. I certainly remember them as a kid, too. Those lollipops were great.

Anonymous said...

I have not seen a tube system in many years since our bank got rid of it in favor of a drive up ATM.

I remember another local bank had one about 10 years ago because my dh was a janitor and cleaned the bank and told me how the drive thru lady had a container of dog biscuits on her counter. At the time we wondered is she ate them....in retrospect perhaps she gave them to people with dogs in the car?

Maybe Tara's bank was small so they had a drive up window?

Anonymous said...

Are you telling me that there are places without tube systems, and you can actually go inside a bank and hand cash to a person?

Wendi Kitsteiner said...

According to Tara, yes. Tara? Can you field an answer to this question?

Anonymous said...

Having lived for the last 25 years, mostly in Indonesia and being laughed at many times when I come back, as you have laughed at Tara, :0 still we have known about these tubes and Ed says they used to be used to deliver memos in huge office complexes and he thought they've been around for 125 years. Jan

Anonymous said...

Ok, first of all, this "anonymous" person better reveal his/her identity :) No, just kidding. I appreciate Jan's comment of feeling a bit out-of-the-loop after living overseas. I should have brought up this excuse sooner. But yes, OF COURSE you can get by with banking with either using an ATM and/or a teller (I personally am also a bit wary of ATMS, esp. for deposits, and love talking to a real person face-to-face for all my banking needs!). And perhaps my BANKS have had such tubey-things, but the BRANCHES I frequented that were near my places of residence did not. So is that so hard to believe that I have not used one of these things?!

Anonymous said...

David says he has never seen those things either. In Platte (population 1300), they just had the one bank with a drive up window and a real person who you hand your money to. I always just walk into the banks and have never used the tube system, although I know they use them at Costco. :)

Anonymous said...

I LOVE YOU, JONESES!!!! Thank you, Dave and Lesley! :)

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking, maybe Tara doesn't have a car? Or maybe Tara is a very social person and likes to interact with people? Or maybe she's just not as lazy as the rest of us and actually parks her car and walks into the bank? Or lastly, maybe Tara has a sugar daddy and has never even had to use the services of a bank? Hmmmm

Anonymous said...

Awww, TaraWara, you're just the cutest. I REALLY want to make fun of you, but I just can't bring myself to do it... Oh, and yes, I have been using the tubing system personally for as long as I've been legally operating a vehicle. Before that, when I was still too short to see out of the car window, my mom used them. Sorry kiddo!

Anonymous said...

Sorry, the phanton comment was from me.

Anonymous said...

To respond to 'anonymous' again: I do indeed have a car. I do like to talk to real people. I think, now having used the drive-through, I might do it again (I'm bigger on efficiency than laziness). And I think I make as many trips to the bank as normal people:) Nicole, thanks for the comment. Perhaps we shall have a bayou poll :)

Wendi Kitsteiner said...

Well now, Tara, I mean, I love Dave. I really do. But Dave was born in Honduras and then spent his childhood in South Dakota. I think there were 8 people in his graduating class? I don't know if he really qualifies as a partial judge. We were also all there when Dave took his stab at pop culture and Time's Up for the first time. So the fact that he hasn't seen the tubes only justifies my point I believe.

Anonymous said...

I have never seen those tubes at banks. I have seen them at COSTCO however. And I'm not from a small town.