Last Supper

Hatice had the Stebbins and Kitsteiner families over for one last dinner before we leave. My friend Sarah Ashmore introduced me to Hatice back in 2010 when we first got here. I immediately asked her to be my housekeeper. As more and more of her clients PCS'ed (permanent change of station) away from Incirlik, more and more of my friends began using Hatice as well.

Housekeepers and gardeners on Base are "the norm." Most people utilize them -- it is sort of encouraged -- creating good relations between the two countries sharing a Base. And then Hatice's sister-in-law, Sema, started working on Base as well, and I started helping her find work too. Housekeepers and gardeners are not permitted to solicit themselves on Base. But their employers often help solicit on  their behalf. We joke that I am Hatice's "pimp."

So last night, Hatice made my favorite: lahmacun. She invited the Stebbins family too, and we ate in the living room on a blanket. "We are having a picnic!" Elijah exclaimed midway through the meal. I have had dinner at Hatice's house numerous times, but this was by far my favorite. Here is a video introducing Hatice, three of her four daughters (Leyhan, Tugba, and Eyda -- her oldest daughter Elif is married and living in Istanbul with one daughter.) Click here to view: Dinner at Hatice's. (Hatice's husband, Mehmet works at a convenience store on the corner, and he is there from sun up to sun down -- every day but Sunday.)

The boys (including William who isn't in the picture below), had a fantastic time playing on the porch and throughout Hatice's house. Here they are with Sema's two daughters (outside edges) as well as their cousin, Aleyna (whose parents run the tailor shop that I frequent.)

I got a video of the kids playing. What I love about this is that the boys speak relatively no Turkish. And the girls speak relatively no English. And yet they are playing and understanding each other perfectly. Kids are so wonderful like that. Here's the video: Kids playing in different languages

I started filming the kids, but then Hatice and I got in a conversation about a plant on her porch. Here is that video: Kids playing outside of Hatice's. This is a plant that was on our porch for two years. I bought it from someone on Base for $5 way back when. Hatice loved it and so, since the plant can't come with us, I gave it to her. However, I didn't know that the plant flowered. We realized it was because the last time it flowered, I was in Germany ... the entire time. I forgot that I was filming while we were talking.

I have also now grown accustomed to Turkish customs. The first of which being, you don't wear shoes in the house. And often, especially after you have eaten, slippers are the "norm." Hatice has told me that this is because, if you are cold, you will get bad gas. So here are Ryan and JB wearing their "required" slippers (with Abigail playing with a small blanket in between them.)


Another custom that Rana has explained to me surrounds gifts. I always wondered why, whenever I went to a Turk's house bearing a house-warming gift, the recipients barely acknowledged the gift. In fact, it is quickly set aside after a brief thank you. In an American home, the gift would be ooohed and aaahed over and shared and eaten right away if designed for that evening. Rana explained that it is seen as rude to pay attention to the gift while the gift-giver is present. This is because it shows the person cares more about the gift than they do the person.

Monday, Hatice will come and clean our home for the last time, preparing for our inspection on Tuesday. Just a few more days in Turkey. Surreal.