If you are doubting . . .

If you are doubting that you could ever love a child that is not from your body fully and completely, I pray that our family is an example to you that not only is this possible but entirely probable.

Right now I am watching our son play in his exersaucer. It's his new favorite place to be. It may have, actually, replaced his swing as top of his list in the last few days.

Isaac is making his normal slew of grunting noises coupled with some dinosaur grunts and loud squeals. He is intently investigating the tag on a stuffed toy train, flailing back and sucking on his teething ring, moving the stationary horse from side to side, and listening to the farmhouse play "Old McDonald" when he taps the birdie on the top of the roof.

I love to watch him play. I love to watch him investigate. I love to watch him learn. And I love so much more than that.

I love to hear him begin talking early in the morning. Even though the sun hasn't come up, hearing his cheery voice on the monitor and seeing his beautiful smile and squinted eyes when you finally come into his room and scoop him into your arms, is priceless.

I love how he giggles every time he sees his puppy. I love how he loves to sit in front of the fish tank for long periods, studying, watching. I love how he kicks his feet when Scrubs takes off down the hallway, chasing a light he will never catch. I love how he thinks his Daddy coming home is the best thing ever, only to watch him repeat the excitement the next day. I love his toes and his chunky thighs and his big blue eyes, and his contagious smile.

I just love him.

There were moments in the adoption process that JB and I questioned how bonded we would be to this child that we knew was coming but couldn't feel or see or touch. I can tell you that there is no biological child that I could ever be more bonded to. Isaac is the light of our lives. He was created by God, birthed by a wonderful young woman, and placed in our arms. But when I look at him, I do not ever think about the fact that he doesn't look like me. I just think about him being our son. I just think about the fact that I have been given the privilege of watching him grow from baby to boy to man. What an awesome gift that we have been given. What a precious opportunity and amazing treasure.

Adoption is not perfect just as biological children are not perfect. Children aren't easy and growing up is hard. But adoption has been perfect for us. Isaac is perfect for us. The laughter and chaos that we craved for so long has now permeated the walls of our house, and I can honestly say that there has not been one moment that I have questioned its inclusion into our lives.

Even Sunday morning, when a diaper overrun by a bunch of smelly stuff led to an impromptu bath and left us racing around like mad people to get out of the house before church became a distant memory, we were thankful. We were glad. We wouldn't change it for anything in the world.

We are blessed. If you are even considering adoption and wondering if you could love that child fully, rest assured that we are proof that you can. We are anxious for Elijah's arrival. Don't get me wrong. But we aren't wishing away the next few months. Everyday that brings Elijah closer, is a day that Isaac has grown up. And we don't want to wish away these days. We are enjoying every single minute of our little boy.

What a gift. What an amazing gift. If you ever wonder whether that gift could compare to a child from your body, please stop in and visit our home or this blog. Love does not know limits. You will never be the same.