An evening out

What a great evening we had last night! I'm not sure the last time JB and I have gotten dressed up and gone out, but it's been awhile. John has worked an incredible amount of hours this week. When he comes off of call on Sunday morning, we have estimated that he will have worked nearly 95 hours! In addition, he had to use his free-time during the last week after the boys went to bed to work on the video for the banquet. It was quite hectic. So needless to say, a night out together, was just what the doctor ordered.

It was a great evening of socializing, eating, and watching a video put on by each of the classes. JB and Matt presented their class' video for the second year in a row, and for the second year in a row did a fantastic job. I did, however, tell them that they HAVE to get it done earlier in the year next year and not wait until the last minute. On Wednesday night, JB was up until midnight and Matt until the wee hours of the morning a few nights in a row. Next year, we'll be moving and they'll be graduating and we'll have this banquet all in one week! We can't have any late night video sessions. Hopefully they will heed Tiff and my advice!

All righty, on to the pictures. (More, as always, on Joia's blog although I think for the first time ever, I got more photos than she did. But that was only because her batteries died.) I brought our good camera which takes such better photos then my cheap little one. Enjoy!

JB outside the Officer's Club. Look at that view. The room we are in is floor to ceiling windows with this view for everyone to see!

Not so zoomed in.

Rob (whose wife Sarah was not there) with his award for OBGYN resident of the year. Rob was so shocked he won this and ran up to receive it as if he had won a marathon. It was hillarious!

Kacey with Dee (a graduating third year.) Kacey is the resident who was in the delivery room when Elijah made his debut! She is getting married in November.

Little Moriah in her beautiful dress. Joia almost missed out on the evening due to Keenan being a bit under the weather. But God worked it all out and she was able to join us. She did bring Moriah (the only kid present) who was an absolute trooper and looked sooo pretty in her little dress.

Cliff and Jodi (sportin' her new hair-do). Isn't it cute?! Jodi's laughing in this photo.

Eric and Andrea outside in their matching attire.


I love this photo. They are blocking the sun right before the photo, but it soooo looks like they are saluting.

I love this picture of Tiff and Joia.


Tiffany and Matt. Tiffany will be having a little girl, Reagan, in October!

Some of my dearest friends: Joia, Kacey, Tiffany, Jodi, and Brittney (who is moving on Tuesday.)

Four of the six wifia members: me, Joia, Tiff, and Jodi. Andrea had already left and Sarah was absent for the second year in a row! Bummer!

Our babysitters were FANTASTIC. They have a bunch of little brothers and sisters themselves so they felt totally comfortable with our two babes. I had told them they could leave Scrubs in the laundry room, but they felt so courageous that when we came home, he was out running around too! Casey will return to college in the fall, but I asked Mary, who is going to college locally, if she'd feel comfortable babysitting solo, and she said absolutely! Hurrah!M

I have really been praying that with Bobbie (and her girls) and Brittney's departures I would find some new people I felt comfortable leaving the boys with. I don't know why I am so surprised when He comes through and answers my prayers. I also got an email from my friend Kendra yesterday who said she would be willing to help us when we need it as well. And our neighbor, who is fourteen, is just getting into babysitting as well, and she and her mom would like to come over together to allow her to practice. Then I also have Jodi and the other gals in our group. Thank you Lord for bringing people into my life who I can trust with our two little guys (and our big, annoying puppy.)

P.S. Joan and Bri should be here after lunch today. We can't wait to see them (and have them keep me company while JB is on call this weekend.)

Banquet

Tonight is the annual banquet for all of the residents. It's a really exciting evening -- always lots of fun and probably the only time all the residents can get together (every single resident is let off of work for the event.) Everyone also tries to get babysitters which makes for an even nicer evening. Last year, I brought Isaac with since he was so little, but this year I have two sisters from church (Mary and Casey!) who are going to come and babysit. What a blessing to find two gals as both boys is a lot for one person.

Watch for pictures on my blog and on Joia's too of course!

Happy Birthday Keith

Keith and me about five years ago

Keith and me (2 years apart)

Keith with his first nephew: our Isaac

Happy birthday to my one and only sibling: Keith (aka "the moose"). He may be bigger than me but I am still older and smart and better looking (and anything else you can think of!) Keith, his wife AD, and daughter Charleigh are coming to visit us in a couple of weeks. Can't wait to see them and meet my niece.

AC & the Mall

Well first of all . . . the really important stuff. We have air conditioning in our home again! The fix it guy finally came by at 10pm, and apparently it was a very basic maintenance procedure and the situation was quickly rectified. Thank goodness! The only downside was that once the air came on, our little boys sleeping in their diapers would get cold. We opted to sneak into their rooms, turn off their fans, shut their windows, and shut their vents, instead of waking them up to put more clothes on them. I let JB do the sneaking. I'm really bad at it. For one thing, I can't open a door quietly to save my life. For another, all my joints crack! I'd make a terrible thief.

Secondly, Joia got some cute pics of Isaac on his first ever carousel ride last night. Joia said he did very well for a "first timer." I guess most kids cry. Isaac didn't cry, but he did seem "concerned" most of the time. Here's a couple of photos, but Joia's blog has many more.

Today has been a busy day. This morning, a bunch of the first and second year resident spouses were going to get together at the splash pad on base for a little brunch. They also invited us "oldies" (the third years.) I wasn't planning on going, but at the last minute decided to jog there, let Isaac play for a bit, and jog back. So that's what we did.

At 11:30, I hosted wifia at my house. Everyone was there but Sarah so that meant seven kids. That being said, it was a pretty peaceful get-together. The kids played well together, and we moms even had a moment that all five of us were sitting together around the table at the same time. Quite an accomplishment.

I'm now waiting for the boys to get up from a nap so I can take dinner to a gal from my MOPS group who just had a baby. I broke my rule about "no more than one event a day" today, but since only one of them will include a car ride, I think it will be "just right."

Air conditioner bites the dust

It is currently 87 degrees outside.

It is "feels like" 94 degrees outside.

And we don't have air conditioning.

I know we lived for a month in Nigeria without air conditioning (or running water or electricity for that matter.) But somehow, when you are used to it, and then it is gone, it is incredibly . . . well . . . hot.

I realize I take for granted the little button we push over every day that makes it cooler in the house. Man oh man did we take it for granted.

This is the worst week this could happen. We have had record setting temperatures here for three days in a row. Over 100 every single day I think. Air conditioning would be really nice, especially with two sons who are real hot boxes.

I noticed it was getting warmer and warmer in here at 2pm. By 3pm, we were all sweating. We were planning on meeting Joia at the mall for "Family night" at 5:00 anyways, so we left early to get out of the house. I left Scrubs in his kennel with a fan blowing on him. Poor puppy just laid on the tile when JB let him out.

I called base maintenance. In this weather (I think it was 102 in the afternoon) this is considered an "emergency." They will be here before 11pm. Eleven! So we gave both the boys a cool bath, opened their bedroom windows, shot fans directly on their crib / pack-n-play, and put them to sleep in only their diapers and a pair of shorts.

Dare I say that I miss Minnesota where the first place we rented didn't even HAVE A-C?!

Shoes please

This morning, Isaac demonstrated his new found ability to express his opinion. He had just woken up, and after changing his diaper, I left his pajama bottoms off, as I normally do, and made him some milk. We then sat on the couch drinking milk -- Isaac in his pajama tops and diaper.

That's when he saw them. I had been cleaning out his diaper bag and had set his shoes and socks next to us on the couch in preparation for our trip to Elijah's therapy appointment later that morning. Isaac squirmed down off my lap and walked over to his shoes and socks. He quickly began making the sign for please. At first, I wasn't sure what he wanted. His shoes? He's never been crazy about having them on. But sure enough, after a bit of deduction, it was his shoes that he wanted.

I pulled him back up onto my lap and held up his socks. He vigorously began rubbing his belly indicating he wanted them on. I put them on and then stopped, figuring that was good enough. Surely he didn't want to put his shoes on, first thing in the morning. When I didn't respond to his shoe request, Isaac grabbed one of them himself and put it next to his foot. He wanted them on. Once I had put them on him, he was happy as could be and walked around the rest of the morning with his shoes on! You can tell from the picture how happy this made him.

Brothers on film

I know some of you aren't interested in videos. But for those of you who are, here are some videos I took yesterday while we waited for JB to get home from work. As always, these are mostly for the Gramas, Joanie, and Bri! I usually send them an email with the links, but most of these had some fun stuff in them that I thought a few other people might be interested in as well. Enjoy (if you want)!

Boo Miami A video depicting our feelings for the University of Miami -- you really get to hear Isaac trying to talk in this video.

Isaac vs. the camera Proof of why filming with Isaac is never easy.

Wrestle Mania JB and Isaac take on the living room!

Twinkle Twinkle Duckie Isaac and Elijah playing on the floor.

Elijah goes right . . . again My attempts to get Elijah to look left, roll left, be left . . . foiled again.

Good Sharing This is my favorite video featuring Isaac intent on giving and taking over and over and over again.

Jon & Kate Plus 8

I've never been a huge follower of Jon & Kate plus 8. I would watch the re-runs in the afternoons when I had a few moments, but I had no idea what night their show was on or that much interest in their family.

But my follower status changed from "occasional" to a "regular" when I read Kate's book: Multiple Blessings. My sister-in-law Katie (who is very into reusing items) passed the book off to me at Christmas, and I was incredibly inspired by it. Here I was, all nervous and in a tizzy about having two boys really close in age. And here was the Gosselin family raising six babies (and twin toddlers) at once! After reading that book, I felt rejuvenated and so ready for Elijah to get here. If they can raise eight kids, I could surely handle two and a dog. Geesh!

In addition, the book was full of Kate discussing their faith in the Lord and how he had helped them through the difficult times surrounding the birth and raising of their sextuplets.

I could have read the book three times. I really could have. It just really motivated me and reminded me of how capable I was of raising these little boys.

I had heard people say that they couldn't watch the show because of the way Kate talked to Jon. I had to defend her. I have a philosophy on relationships. My philosophy is: If it is working, leave it be.

My relationship with JB is a great example of this. If you have spent much time with John and me in person, you've probably noticed that we are a tiny bit sarcastic with each other. We banter back and forth and like to make jokes. Sometimes we take it too far.

This results in "PT" (pillow-talk) time. You all know what that is. It's that moment that you are lying in bed at the end of a night with friends and one person rolls over and says, "Why did you say that?" to the other person who had no idea that there was any problem whatsoever. The other person thought they had had a great night only to discover that it is now "PT" time.

PT time could get a post all to itself so I'll leave it at that.

JB and I had many nights like that early in our relationship. People also gave us a hard time about the way we communicated. So we would attempt to not banter or be sarcastic in front of other people. We'd be in the car on the way to someone's house and promise each other to be well-behaved. "No picking on me tonight." I'd say. "Don't be sarcastic for a few hours, okay?" JB would say back.

The result? Complete crabbiness! Honestly, take away our ability to be sarcastic and banter and we ended up being completely and utterly lost in our communication. It only took about two years of trying that before we both decided that as long as we didn't push it too far, our style of communication was okay because it worked for us.

So back to Jon & Kate. I used to defend them with that same line. Obviously that line isn't true anymore because it doesn't appear it has worked for them. It appears they are on the brink of divorce. Tonight on their show (which I'll watch after Isaac goes to bed) they are making an announcement about the future of their family.

I know this is reality TV. But after reading her book and watching re-runs of the show, I feel pretty attached to this couple. Mainly because they were my chief motivation and encouragement as I prepared to welcome baby #2 into our family. I would say, "Hey if they can raise six babies at once and have a great marriage, so can I." And then their marriage falls apart. And thus my motivation falls apart.

Anyways, I've been meaning to write this post since I watched the season premiere of this show many weeks ago. I literally felt sick to my stomach during the entire show and vowed not to watch ever again. JB actually watched it with me that night (while reading some journal articles). He felt the same way. It was so amazingly painful to watch this family torn apart and their eight children about to lose their parents as they know them.

Repeatedly during that episode, both Jon & Kate reiterated that their children were their biggest priority. I had two major issues with this statement. The first issue is that I don't think it should be that way. I think your marriage has to be the biggest priority. It has to come first. If it doesn't, you can't give your kids everything you need to give them. My second major issue with this statement is that I don't think it is true. If their kids were their first priority they would turn off the cameras, retreat into their home, and give their marriage everything they've got.

I think it bothers me even more because Kate's book was a glowing testament of her faith in our Lord. She talked repeatedly about the fact that they were strong Christians. I know Christians get divorced. But it is just painful to watch everything she talked about come crumbling down.

All right. I could go on and on, but I don't want to bore you all. I just had to get this off my chest. I really am hoping that their "announcement" tonight will inform the whole world that they are turning off the cameras to work on their marriage.

But, unfortunately, I doubt that will be the case.

In love

I found this pic on Joia's blog and it made my heart smile to see it. Isaac is swinging with Joia's husband Philip and laughing with his hot rosey cheeks. I am so madly in love with this little boy that somedays it makes me want to cry.

Isaac is growing up so fast. He says "Daddy" like a pro now (no sign of "Mommy" anywhere in sight), and likes to say "apple" for anything that he might possibly be able to eat. Anytime you sit on the floor he crawls all over you, so happy that you have joined his world. He smiles from ear to ear (and his little dimple emerges) when you push his little duck's belly to play "twinkle twinkle little star" and lights up all over when he sees JB drive up at the end of a workday or even just a quick run out for milk. He gives Elijah kisses quite regularly and even tried to give him a book today by setting it atop Elijah's head. He will eat nearly any food you give him and still gets teary eyed when he realizes that the bottle we are bringing out is for Elijah and not him. He can semi-run now and even though his little bow-legs (which we've been told are within the normal range) cause him to fall, he quickly gets up to try again. He loves to be tickled and held upside down and thinks slamming his hands on the dryer is the greatest game ever.

Thank you Chris and Bri for choosing us to be the parents of this little boy -- it has forever changed our lives. We will never, ever be the same because of our Isaac.

2,000th post

How appropriate that my 2,000th post would be about adoption. I wish I had heard about this earlier. Thanks Tara for sharing it with me.

If you have time, head to Wendy's before the day is out today. Wendy's is donating 50 cents from every Frosty that is purchased during this Father's Day weekend to the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption,a non-profit public charity dedicated to dramatically increasing the number of foster children adoptions in North America.

Thanks for sharing this Tara. Wish I would have heard about it sooner!

One hot day

Despite the major heat warnings in effect for our area, we ventured to Madison and Jocelyn's birthday party at Cherokee Park and then to the home of one of the second year residents for a residency party. I didn't get any photos at the residency party, but I did snag some at the birthday party. As always, I am sure Joia will have a much better selection!

The party was a ladybug party. Elijah willingly donned his antennas for a photo.

But Isaac put his on ice immediately. Ladybugs shmadybugs.

Elijah after eating. We put him in the car with the air conditioning on after this photo. Poor little guy!

Joia and Moriah in her little lady bug dress.

Isaac wasn't so sure about the pinata thing while it was still closed. But once it was open, he quickly figured out that the candy the kids were collecting was a good thing.

Yum!

Moriah in her dress and lady bug antennas

Issaac hung out by the ice bucket and drinks nearly the whole time. Smart little guy!

The birthday family. Jocelyn was turning 3, Madison 4, and Clay the big 3-0!

Grouper without asparagus

There were some specials on the menu for our anniversary dinner last night.

After the waitress went through listing each of them, she walked away from the table to give us time make a decision.

JB turned and gave me a knowing smile.

"What?" I ask taking a sip of my drink.

"Nothing," he replied, still smiling. "I just know what you are going to order."

"No you don't."

"Okay."

I pause. "Okay so what do you think I am going to order?"

Another smile. Or maybe it was a continuation of the previous smile. "The special with the grouper on a bed of mashed potatoes with asparagus on the side. Except you'll ask for a substitute for the asparagus."

I shook my head. He doesn't know me that well. "Actually," I said. "I was thinking of getting something other than seafood tonight." I open the menu and quietly begin scanning the dishes.

I scan and scan. C'mon. There has to be something that sounds better than the grouper.

Crud.

Dangnabit.

After not being able to eat seafood during my ten months of pregnancy (I have no idea why), I have become a sucker for a good grouper. Add a great carb like mashed potatoes, and I can't think of one single thing that sounds better.

"What is it?" JB asks.

I shake my head but feel the frustration growing. I realize as I read the other entree options that I really do want the grouper. And I really do want the green beans instead of the asparagus.

Shoot.

Blasted.

Eleven years of marriage and maybe he does know me a little bit.

Waitress wanders back, and I reveal the inevitable. JB tries not to smirk too hard. But he can't help it. I order the special with a different side.

Go figure.

I guess fifteen years together will do that you.

In 1985 boy's family sends him to Fort Lauderdale Christian School where girl already goes to school. In 1993 boy and girl go on first date. In 1995 girl leaves for college in Kentucky. In early 1997 boy moves to Kentucky to keep an eye on girl. In 1998 boy and girl are married in Bowling Green, Kentucky. In 1999 boy and girl relocate to Franklin, Kentucky. In 2003, boy and girl move to Rochester, Minnesota. In 2008 they receive first miracle one month before they celebrate a decade as man and wife. They find out about second miracle one week before the decade celebration. In 2009, boy and girl go to eleventh anniversary dinner. This time next year boy and girl will be moving somewhere new with their two little miracles (and big puppy) in tow.

As eleventh anniversary comes to a close today, girl wants boy to know how blessed she is that he didn't give up on her. That he followed her to Kentucky and fell in love with her and stood by her during five hard years of infertility treatments and tons of hormones and emotions and frustrations and fights. Girl wants to thank boy for being her best friend. For never giving up on them. For treating her like she never deserved to be treated.

And for knowing that she'd order the grouper without the asparagus.

Happy anniversary JB! I'll love you forever.

Gone and done it

After much thought . . . I did it.

Became a teacher in Florida that is.

Well, not officially.

Officially, I am waiting for the paperwork to come back to say that the state of Florida has deemed me worthy to teach in their state.

Not that I think I will ever teach in their state mind you.

I really don't plan on teaching ever again.

Don't get me wrong. I liked teaching. Somewhat. I liked coaching better. Teaching is hard. People think teachers have the life. Done at 3:00. Summers off. Lots of holidays. But it is an incredibly stressful profession. Honestly, when I think about standing up in front of a room of thirty seventeen year olds again, it gives me a stomachache. I seriously think I might throw up. How did I do that for all five years? I'm really not sure.

One of the final straws . . . one of the last things that happened before I resigned my position was a football player who got mad that I failed him. (I won't go into the fact that I had passed him the previous semester, against my better judgment, with the understanding that he wouldn't wait until the twelvth hour next time.) "I'll let you make up the work this time," I had said. "But next semester, I won't. You'll be out of luck." Okay Coach K. Got it. I promise. No biggie. Second semester, same old thing. When he got upset that I was going to fail him and not let him make up all the work ten minutes before grades were due, I stood in the back of the room after class with him to explain why I wouldn't be allowing him the same grace. He looked at me in the eye (he was tall) and said, "Are you done?"

It's a good thing JB wasn't there in person when the kid said that.

A few weeks later, I resigned. I wasn't paid enough for that sort of disrespect. I could make the same money sitting in office somewhere answering phones. (Which is subsequently why I applied for a job as a receptionist at the RLS Foundation. They couldn't understand why I had, when I had a Bachelor's Degree. They decided to offer me a position that fit me more. I didn't care what I did as long as I wasn't stressed out.)

Oh, another sidenote. I should tell you that ninety percent of my students were great. Really. They were. It was the ten percent however that just wears a teacher out. It was the ten percent that forced me resign.

But back to the teaching license thing.

The teaching license is a precarious thing. Don't use it and you lose it. First I had one in Kentucky. I used that one to get one in Minnesota. Kentucky license has now expired. Minnesota gave me a one year license. Two big tests and one class on accepting the Native American culture later, I had a five year license from Minnesota. But before I could use it, I quit.

Now, the five year license in Minnesota expires this month. Want to renew it? Take three college classes and a huge test and do some other stuff too. No can do. No want to do. No sir'ee Bob. No way Hosea.

You get the idea.

So, instead, I decided to become a teacher in my new state (which is actually my old state but that is neither here nor there). My Florida state. I sent in money. (Is anyone surprised that they charge money to tell you whether your application is good enough?) I sent in my Minnesota license. I sent in my official college transcript. I sent in a birth certificate.

I debated not doing it. Like I said, I don't plan on teaching ever again. But the thing is, if you let your license expire, it is impossible to get it back. Okay, not entirely. But you might as well go back to college and start from scratch again. It is seriously almost that much work.

So instead, I think I bought myself a little bit of time. Not sure how long the new certificate will be good for. Might be a year. Might be longer. But teaching is my profession. If I ever did need to return to the work force, getting a job as a writer (like I had) isn't easy.

So I did it. I'm staying a teacher.

For now.

Or at least I think I am. Still waiting for Florida to say I'm good enough to join their state. We'll see what they say.

Either way, I did it. I didn't throw away my my four year degree.

Not yet anyways.

The bullets of our lives

Thought I would quickly catch you up to speed on what has been going on in our lives. As always, I turn to bullets. They seem to do the trick very well.

• JB has been on a very hard rotation. Very long hours. He is up by 5am and isn't usually home until at least 7pm. Last night he got home a little bit earlier (6:30). We decided to grab some Burger King (the only drive-thru on base) and let Isaac play at the water park on base. Isaac loved it. This is the third time we have gone, and each time, he has dared to get a little more wet. It is so fun watching him play but so hard watching him grow up so fast. Elijah seemed to enjoy watching big brother romp.
• Please say a prayer that I do not kill my dog. He has just been driving me batty. Just going through a little annoying phase. Add to that the fact that he has thrown up three times in the last two days, and he's on shaky ground with me. Albeit, the throw-up was probably my fault. Each bout seemed to follow a hot run. I've been doing three miles, and while Scrubs can handle the distance, I am not sure he can handle the heat. John has told me not to run him for a few days to see if he starts feeling better.
• Tomorrow is our eleventh wedding anniversary. We have a busy day tomorrow with a birthday party and residency party so we are going to go out this evening. Brittney R. has graciously offered to watch both boys so that we can celebrate this evening at Kuvee Beach! I can't wait. We first went to Kuvee during our first few months here on Base, before children joined our life. A lot has changed since that first outing.
• I have been taking out and putting away clothes nearly constantly. Elijah barely spent anytime at all in the 3 month or 3-6 month clothes. He has jumped to 6 month and is busting out of most of those. Yesterday I got out 6-9, and I plan to get 9 out in the next week. Yes, he is four months old, but I think he has found his eating groove. I cannot tell you how much happier and more content he is now that he is eating well. And how much fatter he is getting!
• We are preparing for a bunch of company starting next weekend. Isaac's birth mom Bri and her Mom are coming in for a long weekend. Then my brother Keith and his wife AD and new daughter Charleigh are coming in for the 4th of July weekend followed by JB's brother Matt and his wife Danielle. We will then take two weeks off of company before heading to Colorado where JB will attend a Conference. July will be jam-packed. The good news is that August is currently very quiet.
• Despite JB being gone very long hours, I am really doing well with both babes. I have found that as long as I do not try to venture out of the house too much (I limit my activities to no more than one a day and no more than 3-4 a week), I stay stress free. While our routine is constantly changing, I am finding that things that used to overwhelm me (both boys crying at once, both boys needing to eat at the same time, simultaneous dirty diapers) are now things that I can handle fairly easily. Practice does make perfect. Thanks for the prayers and encouragement. I am doing great!

It's been awhile . . .

. . . since I did a picture post. So, here you go!

First some pics of Elijah, both awake and asleep, showing big brother that he ain't the only one with some big time chubbiness to brag about.

My Aunt Allyson gave Isaac a doctor kit many months ago. He plays with it often, but recently, he has decided that the stethoscope should be worn around his neck, at all times! Seriously he goes everywhere with it on his neck. It really is cute.

Dog and boy continue to be the best of pals. We have really been trying to teach Isaac that some things just aren't nice to do to Scrubby (ex. pull his ears.) Scrubs continues to take a beating as we work out the details. You can see in the first picture that, yes, Isaac is sitting on his back. And in the second he goes in for a hug.

And last but not least, proof of the stethoscope AND the fact that Isaac had been completely weaned. We are solely on the cup now! He was close when I left for Chicago, and we thought we could use the few days without Elijah and his bottles around to solidify the cup. It worked! I put the bottles away for good after returning from Chicago a few days ago.

Please pray for my friends

I have three different friends who are on my mind today. They know who they are. They are all struggling with totally different aspects of the infertility journey: medical complications, early desires for children, considering moving to adoption . . .

All of these have such emotional baggage attached to them. All of them hurt so badly. All of them are things I so want to fix but have no power over. I know prayer works. But when all I can do is pray, sometimes I am left feeling so helpless. I want to fix it. I don't want them to hurt like I did for five years. I feel guilty that I have two boys. Why do I have two boys and they have none? Why can't the world just be fair?

If you think of it, please say a prayer for my three friends today. I won't share their names, but trust me in that they covet your prayers immensely. Pray for peace. Pray for direction. Pray for strength. Pray for wisdom. Pray for guidance. Pray for comfort. And pray that the Lord gives them the desire of their heart: a child to join their loving family.

If you could stop, right now, while you are reading this, and spend thirty seconds in prayer for these three women and the many other women reading this blog who are with them on this difficult journey, I would greatly appreciate it. I am realizing that my heart will never be far away from this topic. It is so close to my soul and I feel it so deeply despite the fact that my journey is not nearly as intense as it once was.

Thanks everyone.

Embryos & transfers

I had gotten a question my blog a few weeks back from June who was preparing to go back in for another IVF. She asked me how to emotionally prepare for the return for more embryos.

This is tricky since I only know about IVF preparation without having a child. I really wonder how I will feel when we go back for our seven embryos now that I have my two boys. I definitely know that it will be less stressful and less emotionally difficult for me after already having my two boys. But how much easier? Will the shots and appointments and procedures and two week wait be considerably easier or still an emotional roller coaster? I cannot answer this. Stay tuned to this blog to find out as we have a minimum of two embryo transfers remaining.

Speaking of returning, I often get a question regarding when we plan to return for our embryos. I can only tell you what our current plan is, and as always, these plans are subject to change. Currently, we are really hoping that next summer we will be sent overseas to fulfill JB's four years of payback to the Air Force. If we are overseas, we are planning to wait until after JB does his payback before returning for the embryos. If we are in the states, we will reevaluate when we go back as it will be much easier for me to travel to have the procedures done than it would be if we were overseas. We currently think that we will wait at least two years and as many as four from the time that we get our new station assignment. (This is called PCS-ing . . . permanent change of station.)

As for the number of transfers we will have to do, I am not really sure. Originally we thought that we would do a transfer of 3 embryos. If that worked, then we would do another with 2, and then another with 2. If that didn't work, we were pretty confident that Mayo would allow us to do a transfer with 4 since 3 of our embryos are of very poor quality. (The other 4 are of fairly good quality.) However, now that I have had a successful pregnancy (something we were not sure was possible) we are not sure if they will let us do a 3. This may mean a 2, 2, 2 and 1 or a 2, 2, and 3. We will have to wait to see what the doctors at Mayo say. Mayo is extremely conservative with their embryos and will not allow us to do more than either they or us feel comfortable with.

Currently our embryos are our number one priority. We will return for them before we ever contemplate any children through adoption or even biologically aside from IVF (we aren't sure, for the record, that we are even capable of conceiving again without treatment as we did with Elijah. We do not know if this was a once-in-a-lifetime miracle or if it could work more regularly now that my body has been "jump started.") Once we have given all seven of our "sticky babies" a chance at life, we will discuss whether we would adopt again or attempt to conceive on our own. However, what we do know is that because I will have to have c-sections for any remaining children we may possibly have, I can't have an unlimited number of these. The pregnancies I do have remaining (if any) must be reserved for our embryos. They are life, and we are wholeheartedly committed to them.

We feel total peace with whatever the Lord has for our family. If that is just these two boys, fantastic. If it is all seven of our embryos working, great. If it is adopting many other children, awesome. If it is biological children aside from IVF, cool. We are going to let Him lead.

But that is off the topic a bit. Back to preparing for IVF. All I can offer, right now, is advice on how I handled IVF. These are my tips for anyone going in for infertility treatments. I realize that this is a short list. Can you guys help me add to it?

• Seek support online from a good online support group like Hannah's Prayer.
• Seek support from an "in-person" support group if available.
• Seek support from a counselor or psychiatrist.
• Seek support from family and friends. My personal advice is to let them in on what you are doing.
• Attempt to find a form of stress relief for the two weeks proceeding, during, and following your treatment. This would include massages, acupuncture, spa treatment, etc.
• During the two week wait, plan something "fun" to do with your spouse or a friend each day. This gives you something to look forward to. Spa treatments, movies, dinners out, anything that you can look forward to.
• Don't have too much down time. Keep yourself busy. Idle time will drive you batty.
• Avoid taking too many HPTs (home pregnancy tests.) (Like I followed this advice! Ha!)

I'm not sure any of these suggestions can truly prepare or help during the emotional roller coaster that individuals go through when they are involved in an IVF transfer and a two week wait, but they are what helped me not totally lose my mind.

Does anyone else have any suggestions that worked for them during their harvests, transfers, and subsequent 2ww? I'd love to add to this list?

Congrats!

Congratulations to my sister-in-law Gabbi who just found out that she has been accepted to nursing school! Yay Gabs! We all knew she would get in but hearing word officially is WAY COOL! We are very proud of you Gabbi.

Williams' Birthday Party

Well I was out of town and didn't get to attend, but thanks to Joia we can all see the great party Matt and Tiffany threw for William's third birthday!

Home sweet home!

Elijah and I are home!

Our luggage, unfortunately, is not.

This has to do with the fact (I think) that when I got to the airport at 7:30am and walked up to the ticket counter at 7:45, I was informed that my 9:45 flight had been cancelled. The gal behind the counter said that I looked young and spry and shouldn't have a problem racing through security and to my gate for an earlier flight at 8:15. Yikes!

I did make the flight after asking people in the security line if they were in a hurry. When each one said they were not, I asked them very kindly if I could "cut." I cut my way all the way to the front. Good thing as they were calling my name when I walked up and I was one of the last people on board the plane. I guess my luggage was not so lucky. I'm still waiting to hear from the airport as to its well-being.

Elijah did great on flight one after a very nice guy asked me if I preferred the window or the aisle. I was honest when I said the aisle and amazing blessed when he let me take the aisle and scooted over to the window seat. The extra room for me hanging over the aisle with the baby and my legs was much appreciated. Nice people make me happy. We opted for two bottles again on this flight. This makes him incredibly happy and deliriously sleepy. A great combo!

I had an extra long layover in Atlanta since I got there an hour early. Enough time to get a salad from Wendy's and get Elijah to take a nap in car seat. Two more bottles and a nice bulkhead seat later, and we were home.

Holy cow, did I forget how hot it was here or what?! After a long weekend of 60-70 degree days, the northern Florida 95 felt incredibly hot! I followed JB's directions to where he had left the car for me and remembered what it is like to get into a really hot Florida car. To make matters worse, I had to switch my car with the van at the hospital exchanging my new cooled off transportation for another hot ride.

I then headed to Brittney's! Oh man was it great to see Isaac. I nearly pushed Brittney out of the way without so much as a hello to scoop that little guy into my arms. I was so excited to be back. While I did miss him over the long weekend, both JB and I agreed that it was nice having some one-on-one time with each of the kids. A lot less responsibility! A huge thank you to Brittney for giving up her Monday so close to her own move for my little boy.

Anyways, Isaac is down for his nap, Elijah is chilling in the swing, and Scrubby (who was a "wee" bit glad to see me himself!) is sprawled out on the tile after playing in the hot backyard for awhile. So I thought I would post a few pics from my trip.

Enjoy! (I sure did!)

First, two more pics from my visit with Kelly and Holly. It was so great to reconnect with these gals. We hope we can do it again when I am in the Illinois/Indiana area.

Kelly with two of her daughters: Hailey and Ashley (and holding Elijah). Her other two: Dylan and Shelby are not pictured. Kelly is doing an amazing job with these four kids! Gosh is she busy!

Holly with her son DJ and her husband. Her little daughter Angel can be barely seen in the pink shirt all the way in the back corner.

Here are some pics from the graduation party.

My Grandmother with my cousin Madeline the graduate and her beautiful cake.


My Aunt Linda (Madeline's Mom and my Dad's sister)

Linda's husband Bob. He's such a funny guy!

Grama and Elijah.

Grama, me and Elijah!

My Aunt Mary holding Elijah and talking to my Uncle Bob.

Here is my Grandmother with her six kids! From left: Scott, George (my Dad), John, Linda, Jeff, and Bob!

Love this lady!

Four generations!

My cousin Katie (who has her graduation party next weekend) with Elijah.

Another one of Madeline.

Here is Linda holding Emmie (Jason and Kathleen's daughter) and Elijah

Jason with his two kids: Emmie and Cullen. I didn't get a single picture of his amazing wife Kathleen (his better half!) :)