Friday, June 12, 2015

We Bought a Farm: Learning Curve

Our van was in an accident and is currently being assessed. They are trying to decide whether to total it or fix it.

(Yes this is causing me stress that I am working on giving to the Lord by the minute. He has currently taken it so I won't go into all the details at this moment.)

I write that to say that instead, I've had to drive JB's truck Sunshine anywhere I need to go. I can't take all the kids in it, but with Grampa and Grama here, I can go run a few errands with one or two kiddos in tow.

As I drive this big hoss of a truck that doesn't have a/c and has to be opened by reaching out through the window, I can't help but thinking to myself:

What in the world are you doing?

Or sometimes it comes out like:

Who are you trying to fool?

Or even:

You are out of your mind!

I mean, I am a city girl from Fort Lauderdale. I've barely ever visited a farm nevertheless lived on one.
  • Am I really living on 100 acres in the country?
  • Am I walking alongside cows?
  • Am I really checking on 12 little geese each morning?
  • Am I one hour from a Target? (JB promised it was 45 minutes but I think he was pushing it a bit.) 
  • Am I a half hour from "town"?
  • Am I taking a picture with two pigs that I am learning how to feed and water?
  • Am I really becoming aware of ticks and chiggers?
  • Am I scouring the Internet for second-hand boots for my kiddos?
And the answer is:

Yes I am.

Each day I question what I have gotten myself into. I wonder if I am cut out for this. And I second-guess whether we did the right thing.

But when I think about it for more than 10 seconds, here is what I do know:
  • I have never seen my husband happier.
  • I get to raise my children where the green grass grows.
  • This is absolutely where God has called us.
  • I belong here.
  • I love my life.
I truly thank the Lord for this amazing opportunity and pray that we can continue to listen to His voice, follow His direction, and move forward in doing what we feel He has called us to do.

But don't ever let my confidence in knowing I belong here be confused with my absolute bewilderment at the fact that I am here. 

I'm pretty sure I am out of my ever-loving mind!

And I'm okay with that.


Anonymous said...

Loved this -But don't ever let my confidence in knowing I belong here be confused with my absolute bewilderment at the fact that He did. Or the fact that somehow I am okay with it.

I remember after 3 years overseas saying to Uncle Ed -"I don't think i can do this the rest of my life"! It was his dream /call he'd worked towards all our life together even before marriage...that was alot of pressure. I remember him saying to me -"Jan God has called me to you and the family first now. Would you try one more term (4 years) and if you still feel you can't do it -I will go back to rebuilding locomotives." I couldn't believe it! But for my personality -it gave me alot of freedom in keepin' on keepin' on in those learning curves! I love who God worked in me to become through it all -that I would have never become without this wild adventure of a life -but it was not always easy and there were tears! But easy isn't always the most satisfying! and I sure know that feeling of your husband being the happiest you've ever seen him -that was uncle Ed in the jungle -and my kids running around the jungle! Soooo once you're setting the farm -come visit us in the jungle yes?! :) Tante Jan

Anonymous said...

I grew up on a farm and it is the best place ever. For one, it's fun. Fun to roam and play with the animals, fun to build forts in the woods, fun being outside all day...etc. It also fosters a strong sense of responsibility. There are animals that depend on you for their food and shelter and it will take all 6 of you (eventually) to work the farm. The kids will learn that work comes before fun, but also that work IS fun. They will become strong physically, but also strong in character. I'm sure the kids will become more keen on how foods taste and will prefer fresh vs. store bought (to this day I will not eat most store bought canned fruit and veggies, plus I hate buying meat in the store. It also took me 20 some years to find a manufactured pickle that tastes like it's been home canned). Living on a farm also taught me about life and death (I've seen animals born and die).

I am now city-fied. It's pretty funny to watch me walk through the 4H barns at the fair (you see, I no longer have a set of barn clothes or shoes and I don't want manure tracked through my house). But, if given the chance, I would still spend hours outside with the kittens and horses, in the grove making forts and playing cops and robbers, or just hanging out in the backyard climbing trees (notice I didn't say I would be weeding the garden. Not all aspects of farm life were fun).

I hope you don't mind a few "words of wisdom." Don't let the kids become too attached to the animals you are going to eat. It happened in my house, before I was born. My dad had to sell the pig instead of butcher it. After that it was drilled into us that livestock were not pets. You might want to consider getting a herding dog, especially if you get cattle that roam on pasture. They save you a lot of time. Boarder Collies are wonderful and are easily trained. They are great at herding children too. :)

I'm so happy for your family. And, I love reading about your farm adventures.