Pain & Comfort

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." James 1:2-3

"As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless." 2 Sam 22:31

"And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to His eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will Himself complete and make you what you ought to be, establish and ground you securely, and strengthen, and settle you." I Peter 5:10

These scriptures really jumped out at me when I did my devotions yesterday morning. They really got me thinking as well. In our case, I have been blessed to actually find some meaning in the five years that I dealt with infertility.

My meaning is Isaac. As I have written before, I am now an advocate of adoption to the millionth degree. Isaac has completed our family. Even without our China daughter or Elijah . . . we feel satisfied getting the opportunity to be Isaac's parents.

In my mind I see things having transpired differently. We never went through infertility treatments or five years of pain and disappointment. We have our biological children just as we thought we wanted. Then Bri gets pregnant. She doesn't even think to call us. She gives Isaac to another family. Or she does call us. And we say no. We direct her to another family where there are no children -- where we think Isaac is more "needed."

I can't imagine either of those scenarios. Thus, my reason for going through five years. We had to be childless when Bri conceived Isaac. We had to be. Was that really the reason? I have no idea. I can't read God's mind. But for me, thinking that Isaac is the reason makes everything we went through worth it.

But that makes me lucky. Lucky to have a reason for our pain. I know so many couples living in the midst of the years I went through. Some of them are getting ready to do IVF right now. Others have given up on infertility treatments, either as we had (for a time), or permanently. Some have lost babies either before, during, or after delivery. Some have made the decision to remain a family of two. Others are looking into foster parenting or adoption.

And that is just infertility and pregnancy loss. That is just one small piece of grief that permeates our lives on this earth. The list of other griefs and disappointments is too large to possibly go into on this blog. There are so many things that can pain us on this earth. So many heartaches that make us question the Lord or his existence and then cling to Him all the more.

The truth is, not everyone who goes through that unending pain will see a reason, be it accurate or not, for their pain. At least not on this Earth. They won't know why they had to hurt so badly when it seemed that others were getting the answers to their prayers.

And that's where these scriptures bring me comfort.

"Consider it pure joy . . . the work of the Lord is flawless . . . He will complete and make you what you out to be . . . He will settle you."

God has a plan. I can't promise that you will see that plan come to completion while you are on this Earth. But He is on your side. He has your best interest in mind.

I pray that I remember this the next time my prayers go unanswered. My prayer for a baby when I wanted it would mean Isaac wouldn't be here. I am so amazingly thankful that those prayers were not answered the way I wanted. Thank goodness God could see the whole picture and He knew better.

I pray we all remember this.