We Bought a Farm: When farm kids see dogs mating

I debated sharing this. I find it very funny, but I'm also a little modest so sometimes I avoid writing about these things. 

But humor can feel so so good. We've lost someone very special to our family this week. I'll be flying home to Florida for the funeral this coming weekend. But last night, I sent these funny statements to my friends Debbie and Carrie -- having just returned from a funeral for their beloved. They both told me they belly-laughed. If they belly-laughed in the midst of their grief, it's worth sharing with everyone else in hopes that someone else will get a belly laugh.

Belly laughs are needed sometimes. 

I'm really noticing that farm kids are ... different. They handle life and death very differently. When my kids see a ram mating a ewe they will innocently tell me, "Hey, I saw Captain helping the farm today!" They don't quite understand all the details, but they understand most of them. When they see an animal die, it impacts them but the facts are much more black and white. They are used to new life. They are used to death. 

So here's what happened at our farm last night.

Ritter and Arabelle mated. They didn't "connect" last time she was in heat so we were all very, very excited to see that we would probably have another little of puppies this summer. We love having puppies around here. Especially ones we aren't keeping. If you aren't familiar with dogs mating, I'll tell you that dogs that successfully mate are usually stuck together for about fifteen minutes. (Just google it and read about it yourself.)

So upon seeing the dogs "tied" together, the following conversations began to tumble forth.

John: "Well, we should probably be having puppies in June!” 
Abigail: “Probably? They mated. Aren’t puppies for sure?” 
Isaac: “No. Mom And Dad mated for ten years and couldn’t have kids which is why they adopted me.” 

Seriously. He said that. Came up with it on his own. 

Later I went in to say good night to Abigail (age 7) and Hannah (age 5) who share a room.

Abigail: “Do grown ups ask before they mate?” 
Me: “Yes."
Abigail: "Do they say, 'hey do you want to mate'?"
Me: "Sort of."
Abigail: "Do they get tied together for a long time like dogs do?"
Me: "No. Not really."
Abigail: "Is it just like a one-second tie in grown-ups?"
Me: "Yes."
Abigail: "Do the dads jump on the moms back like the ram does to the ewes."
Me: "Ummmm ...."

At this point, I began desperately looking over my shoulder. I could see JB in the hallway and started doing a full-body head nod to encourage him to back me up. He instead called from the hallway: "No, you are doing just fine honey."

Really. He left me there. By myself. In the wilderness of kids and the birds and the bees. 

At this point the questions got even more personal. They involved all the details that you sort of know are coming but want to avoid about how adults can do this if they wear clothes. I will say that the questions culminated with Hannah saying, "So I have eggs inside me right now? Will they ever fall out?"

I'm blushing writing this. But it's life. It's factual. It's farm kids.