Visit to the Apple Orchard

Gracie with her Uncle John

Grace and John pickin' apples (and eatin' them too)

Gracie made it through the kids' corn maze twice and then spent some time with the pumpkins

I want to take a second to thank my allergist, Miguel, for making this moment possible! I loved the orchard unlike the last time when I couldn't breathe the entire time. YOU ROCK MIGUEL!

Wendi and Grace join Gabbi while the men pick the apples.

"You can't find me!"

"Please dad -- can we buy this one?"

Grace checkin' out the baby chickens while keeping an eye out for new people to meet (Grace loves to introduce herself and her whole family to everyone she sees!)

Grace, Mom & Dad on wagon ride back to the car

A trip to the "doctor"

Well, John's brother, Ray, his wife Gabbi, and their daughter Grace have arrived in Minnesota! They got in on Saturday around 4:00 and thanks to Dave and Lesley who let us use their jeep, we both picked them up and drove back to Rochester. Shortly after arriving, Grace brought out the doctor's kit we gave her a few months back and she and JB took turns checking reflexes and taking temperatures and discussing blood pressure. Afterwards John made fajitas, Ajit came over, and we all walked to Gabbi's favorite -- Starbucks. We are so blessed to have our family here to visit. We just got back from Pannekoken and are now off to the Apple Orchard! Wish you all were here :)

Checking reflexes

Discussing Grace's symptoms

Getting ready to look for animals in Grace's nose

Gracie tells Uncle John about the problems of her life

Grace checks Uncle John's ears and then she lets him check hers!

KIT-MANIA BEGINS

Well, after today, I will have more pictures to post as Ray, Gabbi, Grace and little "dude" (the unborn son!) are coming to visit us today. They come in to the Minneapolis Airport around 4:00. Can't wait. I will for sure include lots of pictures for everyone to see.

In other news, I am facing some difficult decisions at work. To make a long story short, when my boss at Mayo got this huge grant two months ago, the work load on my part really picked up. I am currently not able to get the things he needs done in the 24 hours a week that I am there. We both gave it our best shot including me coming in early and even coming in on the weekends, but there is just too much to do. I have decided that I am probably going to meet with him and my bosses at RLS this week and discuss making some changes to give me some more time at Mayo. I am not exactly sure how this will work out, but I trust that the Lord will guide all of our steps and help work this out.

I also got another opportunity to do freelance writing this week through my connections with Rochester Women (the magazine I write for). I am going to be writing scripts for a company which provides videos for real estate companies. This job will offer me as much or as little money as I would like to make.

So a lot of changes going on -- I will keep you posted. Also JB starts research as of today! Yipppppeeeee!

It ends with you

It usually starts quietly.

A hidden secret.

A survival strategy.

An unhealed wound.

Someone was hurt and never healed. So they taught pain how to parent. 

What doesn't get transformed gets transferred.

You didn't inherit only eye color or traditions. You inherit: 

• Silence
• Rage 
• Avoidance
• Control. 

We call it, "just how we are." But often, it's HOW we survived.

The Bible calls these curses to the third and fourth generation. (Exodus 20:5)

This isn't about punishment -- it's about patterns. And God gives language to help us see them!

The good news?

Christ redeemed us from the curse! (Gen 3:13)

But freedom isn't magic -- it's a process.

Deliverance breaks the curse. 

Discipleship breaks the cycle.

Intergenerational trauma shows that: You were shaped by your family more than you realize. 

Roles were chosen -- they were assigned. Emotions weren't felt freely -- they were managed for you.

And without intervention, you won't just inherit the past -- you'll repeat it. Which one were you?

• The Scapegoat carries the blame so the family doesn't have to face its brokenness.
• The Hero overachieves to prove the family is fine when it's not.
• The Lost One disappears emotionally or physically to avoid the chaos. 
• The Mascot uses humor or charm to distract from the pain.
• The Caretaker becomes the emotional parent to keep everyone else together. 

These AREN'T PERSONALITIES!

They're toxic survival strategies passed down like family recipes. 

Try to heal and you'll be called:

• Ungrateful
• Overdramatic
• Difficult
• "Not the same anymore"

Truth sounds like betrayal to those still committed to dysfunction. 

Can you be the one who said: 

"This trauma doesn't get to raise my kids!" or "The silence doesn't get to bury another truth." 

This ends with me.

You're NOT the black sheep.

You're the pattern breaker.

You're a Hero!

What breaking it looks like?

• Naming what happened.
• Refusing to gaslight yourself.
• Feeling the grief you were taught to suppress.
• Creating boundaries without needing permission.  
• Inviting God and trusted guides into your healing.

Breaking the cycle is holy work:

• It's repentance.
• It's renewing your mind.
• It's carrying your cross.
• It's choosing legacy over comfort.

Healing doesn't mean hating your family. It means refusing to carry what was never yours. It means letting therapy, prayer, and truth walk you home to yourself.  

You won't be perfect.

You will be different.

And that's enough.

Because your children won't have to heal from a home they grew up in.

It's not rebellion.

It's redemption.

You're not ruining the family.

You're rescuing the future.

It ends with you.

YOU MIGHT BE A MINNESOTAN IF ...

You might be a Minnesotan if ...

• If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through l8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by . NO WAY but I know people who do!
• If you're proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each year, because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation. I know this is true but am not proud of it at all!
• If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too Spendy". Hate this word -- have yet to use it.
• If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March. Yes! Can you believe it? All THREE of the shut down.
• If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time. John has -- no joke!
• If your town has an equal number of bars and churches. It does ashamed to say
• If you know how to say Wayzata, Mahtomedi, Edina, Shakopee, Winton and Ely. Oh my, I only missed one of these!
• If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy. Well, not with my husband the spicy man doing the cooking
• If "Vacation" means going up north past Virginia for the weekend. Oh wow this is so true!
• If you know several people who have hit deer more than once. Does me hitting 2 at the same time count?
• If you often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again Oh boy -- all the time in the car.
• If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching . No, this still really stressed me out, but you should see how fast people will go by past me (although they are often in the ditch a few minutes later :)
• If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit. Well I don't have kids, but I can see how this would be important.
• If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow. This is a good point!
• If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction. Holy crap! Did I write that? How did they READ my mind!
• If you can identify a southern or eastern accent. I am improving in this area daily.
• If you consider Minneapolis exotic. Well, I don't but people around here do!
• If down south to you means Iowa. Oh my! It does mean Iowa. I need to get out of here!
• If a brat is something you eat. It is I am sorry to say.
• If you find 0 degrees a little chilly. Believe it or not, I do feel this way. Last night it was 32 and I thought it felt great.
• If you actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Minnesota friends. I think that's what I am doing right now.

Little tid bits

Nothing BIG going on but lots of small things going on. So I thought I would give you some bullet points of our lives.

• My eyelid issue: Well, Jb finally talked me into letting him fix my eye next time. This little snip at the dermatologist cost us $110. If he can't convince me through guilt trips, he can convince me through money. Am I Dutch or what? So next time, I'll let JB cut open my eye on the kitchen counter.
• Buh Bye Kristi & Logan: Well, I took Kristi and Logan back to the airport on Monday. We had a wonderful time. Jb cooked some awesome food over the long weekend and even babysat for us once so that we could do some shopping. It rained a lot while they were here, but I was so blessed to spend time with Kristi and get to know my awesome little goddaughter better. Logan is so much fun. The day after she left, both Jb and I agreed that we missed her cute little "hi" and farm animal noises. She has an awesome personality and is so fun to be around.
• Buh Bye OBGYN: Jb is done with his OBGYN rotation. While he enjoyed this, the hours were tough (about 80 hours a week). He now has a one week endocrine rotation before he starts his research rotation on Monday.
• Weather: The weather right now is wonderful. It has been in the 60's nearly every day. Today it was a little cold (50's) but overall, just wonderful weather. The leaves are changing and JB and I have been going out each evening and either biking or running.
• TV Shows: The start of Jb onto the beloved research rotation has encouraged us to watch more TV than usual. In the past, we've had time for Survivor and that's about it. However, we now have a few more favorites. Two of our interests are Lost and Prison Break. (I really like Prison Break but don't pass that around -- it's very unlike me.)
• Thanksgiving: We plan to go to Chicago for Thanksgiving. We are excited about this as Jason & Kathleen and Josh & Sarah will be with the Huisman side this year. We plan to spend Thursday and Friday with them and then Saturday and part of Sunday with the Kotynskis who are home from Indonesia!
• Christmas Break: Today I got up the guts to ask my boss at Mayo to give me two weeks off for Christmas Break. I was dreading this. He is very good to me, but really prefers that I don't miss more than a few days at a time. But I asked, and even though he gulped, he said yes (with my promise to do some work from Florida). This means that we are going to take the longest Christmas Break that we have ever had. We plan to be gone from the 16th to the 31st or so. Of course, included in this is our cruise to Mexico which we are looking forward to.
• Kits Koming: Well it's about to be Kit-Mania in Rochester. Ray, Gabbi and Grace arrive on Saturday and stay until the following Sunday. Mom and Dad come in the next weekend for a four day visit. We are so excited to see our families and have them in town. JB has been busy planning what he wants to cook during their visit. I can't wait to hug GRACIE!
• Meet & Greet: On Monday evening, JB and I went to a little social for the 2nd floor of our condominium. This was initiated by Susan George and her husband Tom. They are probably in their 70's or 80's and Susan can talk more than any woman I have ever met -- seriously. Her husband just lets her go. They are so cute! Well, we officially met all of our new neighbors as we have had 2 new condo owners in the last 3 or 4 months. Jb and I are by far the youngest. Everyone is in their 70's and 80's and little "Kit" is 90! The next youngest is a divorced woman in her late 40's who just moved in across from us. This was a really fun time.
• Jb's Hobbies: Jb has some recent interests including his 2 love birds (they have a new cage), his fish (he is cleaning out their tank as we speak), Harry Potter, (he finally decided he needed to see what all the fuss and arguments were about), and of course, cooking. He cooks new things everyday. He has also been reading a book about composting toilets. I have no idea what this is about and have decided not to ask.
• Wendi's Work: Things are going well for me at the Foundation, Mayo, and at Rochester Women. Tomorrow evening I am actually going to meet with my Editor from RW about another free lance opportunity. We will see what comes of this. I enjoy the writing but it is a little stressful trying to write what someone else wants. However, my dream since I was young was to be a writer. I was unable to do Newspaper Journalism in college becuase of basketball, but maybe I will eventually be just a writer again.
• My hubby Rocks: I just wanted to take a moment to tell everyone that I am married to the best husband in the world. We've been through a rough few years, but he has stood by my side and been my best friend every step of the way. I truly know that whatever life holds for our future, we will move through it together. I have been to the doctor more times than I like to think about since coming to Rochester, and he has only missed one appointment! He has willingly gotten up with me at all hours of the night and administered daily shots without blinking. I truly am in love. We went through a very rough stretch but have come out on the other side with shining colors. I LOVE YOU Jb!

More pics of the Hunts

Well Kristi and I had a bunch of fun today. It was still rainy, but we did major shopping. We took Logan with us the first part of the day, and when we stopped home for lunch, she was tired, and Jb volunteered to babysat while she slept. By the time Kristi and I got home, Logan was up and playing and having a great time with John. She also blessed him with 2 dirty diapers in 1 hour! GO LOGAN!

Kristi found Logan's Halloween costume while we were out -- A LADYBUG! Too cute. So here are some pics of the new costume. The third picture is Logan with the hat and gloves and sweater that Kristi helped me pick out for her birthday.

I have been so blessed to have Kristi and Logan visiting and will miss them when they leave tomorrow. But we are already planning my trip out there this time next year!

LEE HUNT WINS REDMAN TRIATHALON

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! Lee won the triathalon. You can view the race he was in at: http://www.redmantriathlon.com/! He actually won the whole thing! He just called Kristi, and we just found out. Apparently it was unseasonably warm and a very difficult day but he won despite a 20 minute "recovery crash time" when a cop waved a van on and Lee hit the van! Anyways, I'll post details tomorrow after the award ceremony. WE ARE PROUD OF YOU LEE!

Kristi & Logan arrive!

Well Kristi and Logan have arrived and I am so excited! For those of you who don't know Kristi, she was my college roommate for three years (until I get married at WKU). Kristi is one of my bestest friends in the whole world, and it is so wonderful to have her and Logan (my goddaughter!) here. What is even more awesome is that even though it has been almost a year since I have seen her last, it feels like just yesterday that we saw each other. We are able to pick right up where we left off, and it feels like we haven't been 6 years out of college. I am so blessed to have met Kristi and have a friend like her. She is the type of buddy that I could call at any moment with any problem and she is right there with me.

Her daughter Logan is such a blessing and a wonderful, precious little girl who is a fantastic eater (she'll try anything!) and a big smiler. She loves to play peek-a-book with JB too. Her "da-da" Lee is currently running an Ironman (HE IS THE MAN!) in Oklahama City. We are anxious to here how he did in the extreme heat of Oklahoma today. Logan's favorite toy is a ball and she also likes to make barnyard noises (definitely the daughter of a cowgirl!) She can say "hi" as well.

Kristi and Logan actually got here on Thursday nite, but their 10:40 flight turned into 12:30 so I suppose that means they got in on Friday morning. We didn't get to bed until after 2 on Friday morning and I was at work by 7:15 so definitley needed a nap on Friday.

Friday evening we had the Jones', Tara, and Ajit over as Tara is leaving for Arizona for a 6 week rotation on Sunday. Sam and Nick came over afterwards, and we all watched The Longest Yard -- which isn't the greatest movie in my opinion. However, the guys seemed to really enjoy it.

This morning we took a tour of Mayo and went to the Farmer's Market and Jb is getting some Indian ready for dinner. I wil try to put up more pictures over the course of the weekend. I think their departure Monday afternoon is going to come a lot sooner than I would like.

ahhhh-choooo

Well, on Monday morning at 7 a.m., JB completed his 24 hour on-call rotation in OB. He actually delievered two babies on his own which was very exciting! And the wonderful husband that he is met me at the allergist at 7:45 after being up for nearly two days.

My allergies have been a huge issue for me this year. I really didn't struggle with them much at all the first two summers/fall in Minnesota, but this year, if I am outside for more than an hour, I become infested with sneezing and a runny nose and want to tear off my head! (At this point Jb the realist would ask me if this is really what I want to do. It is! I mean it. I want to tear off my head!)

The only way I can describe it is someone torturing you by putting a feather up your nose and twisting it around. (It makes me want to sneeze just thinking about it!) What makes it worse is that, if I go outside, I pay for it for another day, I am so exhausted. With one month of nice weather and a lot of family coming in, I don't want to be stuck keeping the air on and not going outside.

Anyways, our friend Miguel from Bible Study (who does not want me to call him "Doctor Parks" I found out), got me in yesterday morning. He took a detailed history and smerked when I told him I made an annoying noise with my throat (JB completely agreed -- he hates when I do this). But Miguel said that 99% of people who make this noise, have bad allergies.

So they did a detailed allergy test where they poke your arm with about 45 different needles for all the common things you are allergic to. Turns out I was a little allergic to dust mites and white ash. However, my arm practically blew up by the ragweed prick. It was huge! Miguel said I am very allergic to ragweed. He also said that this year had been particarly bad for this weed.

So, he gave me stuff to treat this and said next year he would have me treat preventively beforehand. I also got in a study while I was there for people who have what I have and made $25 by giving some blood. They also asked to put me on the list for people to call when they have studies. Miguel said I'd be getting called a lot so I am not sure I am glad I did that or not.

After taking the meds yesterday, I feel a lot better. The other good news: at first freeze, the allergy will be gone. So I guess I have something to look forward to about winter this year.

JB has off today and then goes in tonite from 7 p.m. until tomorrow at 7 a.m. Also, Thursday nite Kristi comes into town!!! I canNOT WAIT!!!!!!!!

Housewarming for the Ittys

Well, today I thought I would let the pictures tell the story. Last night we went to a housewarming for our friends Ajit and his brother Sujit. John's on overnight rotation today so I have a little time on my hands. I am waiting for Melissa to come over later for some long overdue scrapbooking. Enjoy!

Is he my husband or a doctor?

Well, this has been a very busy week. I have been trying to do some extra hours at RLS -- I have a ton of work to do AND I am a little behind on hours from doctors appointments. Yesterday, I had to go to the dermatologist and get a little cyst removed from my eyelid.

This cyst created a funny exchange between Jb and I. Jason and Kathleen were here to witness the beginnings of this exchange. Jb was convinced that he could remove this cyst himself! He looked at it and said he was pretty sure of what it was and that he could take it off. So, we tried this. We went in the kitchen, I laid back on the counter, and he got out some good light and started poking and prodding. That's about the time that I FREAKED!!!! He said that I didn't trust him, and I denied this, but then I thought some more, and I realized, that he was absolutely right. It's my eye! He's just my hubby John who pierced my ear when I was 16! How can regular old John be a doctor! ?

So, yesterday, I went to the doctor, and he told me it was, well, exactly what Jb told me it was, and he told me he wanted to, well, do exactly what Jb wanted to do. So I let him. It hurt a little but nothing bad.

So I emailed Jb who was inbetween two cesarian deliveries. He immediately said "I KNEW IT! I knew I could have done it!" Then he asked me if I will ever trust him, even after he gets his M.D. I am honestly not sure. he's my husband. He's not a doctor!!! I mean, he will be a doctor, but isn't he still my husband? Oh alas -- I don't know this if this is going to work out at all. At what point will I shift from seeing him as John to seeing him as someone who can remove this little cyst?

Anyways, Jb has been busy all week delivering babies. I am including a picture of how I find him after his rotations. Here he is, in his chair, recooping from his busy day of babies. This week he is doing close to 90 hours so he is a little "pooped".

Going for a bike ride now and then going to have a low-key evening at home tonite and office-cleaning day tomorrow before he returns for a 24 hour rotation on Sunday.

A few Photos of Jb & Me

Well, I have realized that I dont' really have any decent pictures of John and me (and it is "me" in this instance, not "I" -- I can give a grammar lesson later if you would like). So I thought I would post 2 of our favorites on my page. One of the pictures is from last summer when Jb graduated from Commissioned Officer Training. The other is from one of my favorite places on this Earth -- Mt Pilatus in Switzerland. I loved it there. It is absolutely one of th e most beautiful places on this earth.

In other news, as I told some of you, I got some good news in our infertility issues as the Metformin drug I have been on for nearly six months, worked for a second time. Last night we celebrated with a Dairy Queen blizzard (what else!?) We ask for your prayers as we follow the Lord's leading.

John has off today but then he is on Wednesday thru Friday 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. and Sunday 24 hours. We will watch Karuna tonite and spend some quality time together. In case you don't know, I really love Jb! He is the greaest husband in the world.

Other famous blogs -- Including CALVIN'S

So I thought I would take some time here to link you to other people's websites that deserve minor recognition.

The first is Calvin's blog. You can visit his blog at: www.cowfunone.blogspot.com . Calvin is a Cardiac Surgeon. He and his new wife Karen who just went on their honeymoon after being married for over a year have become good friend's of our's in Rochester. They are from Canada and plan to return as soon as they are humany able. In church this morning, right before the sermon started, we swapped Blog addresses and he promised to include a post regarding his tall friends. Now, Calvin is fairly sarcastic -- WAY more sarcastic than me and close to as sarcastic as my mom. But he really did it! He really included me in his blog with a link to my blog. I was honored. He told it pretty straight too. Our faith does bridge some of the differences we see about society, politics, medicine etc. They are really fun people and Karen is a great cook! Anyways, even though he makes fun of me a lot for being tall, we like Calvin well enough to include a link to his blog. (Calvin knows how to hyperlink the addresses -- I can't figure that out so I am just including the whole thing. Can you explain Calvin?) Calvin and Karen were actually the people who got me started in blogging so this is another reason why posting about their site is appropriate.

The next site I should link you to, is that of my cousin Jason, who started a blog after visiting MY blog when he was here visiting. His address is: www.huisofamily.blogspot.com. You can see some great pics of my second cousin, Cullen. What a "little man".

I also thought I would link you the site of Erica Van Zuidam at: http://www2.caringbridge.org/il/ericavz/index.htm. If you haven't visited this site before, please do. Erica is my cousin Sarah's cousin (not related to me) who lost both hands and legs to Bacterial Meningtis. Her spirit is amazing, and I look forward to continuing to follow her story.

Okay, so I think that's it for now. Right now it is Sunday night. We are getting ready to walk over to our friend Ajit's house and catch a movie.

Congratulations Matt!

I just wanted to write a real quick blog and say congratulations to John's brother Matt who enlisted in the ARMY yesterday. It's been a long time in coming for Matt, who's wanted to be in the ARMY for as long as he can remember. I have told you some of his story to overcome huge obstacles to achieve this. Even though it is difficult with the state of our world today, we are very happy for Matt. The only thing that could have made this day better would have been if he had decided on the AIR FORCE instead.

Good job Matt! We are proud of you. I must however, include an Air Force picture on this page as well being as I love my husband slightly more than I love Matt.

OB Rotation and Favorite Movies

Well, it's been a long week in the Kit. house. JB is on his OB rotation. This has proved more emotional for both of us then we were originally planning. Not only because of the infertility issues for both of us, but also because there are a lot of miscarriages and stillborns during this rotation. There are also some happy moments which are mixed with other emotions for both of us because our own journey has just reached the 2 year mark.

But on top of the emotional sides, his schedule has also been tough. Monday he was off for Labor Day. Tuesday and Wednesday he worked from 7 a.m. until 7 p.m. Thursday morning he went in at 7 a.m. and just got home at 7 a.m. on Friday morning. So basically he did 48 hours in just 4 days. He slept about five hours and then last night we watched Sahara and I went to sleep at 8:00. Today we went for a bike ride and right now I am watching the U.S. Open's Super Saturday while he is at the library.

Speaking of movies, Sahara is a good one, which made me think: what are my all-time favorite movies. So here they are in order of my favorites. I only have 9. If I think of a 10th, I'll let you know. I will also try to get John's favorites on here too.

Also, feel free to post your favorites in the "comments" section. Just click on "comments" below this post and post away.

1. Return to Me
2. Counte of Monte Cristo
3. Armageddon
4. Apollo 13
5. Remember the Titans
6. Knight's Tale
7. While you were Sleeping
8. The Notebook
9. Princess Bride

Kathleen' Info

So Kathleen sent me an email the other day -- it was one of those chain emails that asks you to answer questions. They are pretty interesting, and I NEVER do these. So I thought this time I will do it and do it on my blog.

1. First name? Wendi
2. Were you named after anyone? Yes, the restaurant. I was supposed to be Timothy because they thought I was going to be a boy. When I wasn't they got desperate I assume. But then they wanted it to be different so they added an 'i". My mother also says that the name Wendi doesn't sound like an old-lady's name.
3. Do you wish on stars? No.
4. When did you last cry? Can't remember so that means awhile ago.
5. Do you like your handwriting? It's okay. My students always said I had teacher's handwriting.
6. What is your favorite lunchmeat? I really like peanut butter and jelly, banana, or honey. We buy lunchmeat, but I really don't ever eat it.
7. What is your birthday? May 22
8. What is your most embarrassing CD? I honestly don't think I have ever bought a CD. JB does it for me. This is kind of pitiful isn't it?
9. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? Well this is a dumb question. If you say yes, what does that say about you? If you say no, what does that say about you?
10. D o you have a journal? I have had many. I do have one for writing, but I don't use it much anymore. I have one on my computer I use periodically and now I have my blog.
11. What are your nicknames? Wen (close friends and family), Wendicles or cles (WKU teammates -- mainly Shea and Kristi), Wendamoose (the VanWycks), and Wendinator (the Rays -- mostly Ronnie)
12. Would you bungee jump? For money or a competition -- not for fun. This is not fun. Things that you can die doing, are not meant to be done for enjoyment. Like skydiving -- what the heck?
13. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? No unless I was running or playing ball. They are too tight to pull off then. Every time I get a new pair I say that I should not do this because I know it is not good for the shoes but I am too lazy.
14. Do you think that you are strong? Ummm, I don't know. Another dumb question I think.
15. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? DUH! CHOCOLATE!!!!
16. Shoe size? This is one of those questions I get from people curious about my height along with how tall are you, do you play basketball, how tall is your husband, and where do you find clothes. So I am not going to answer.
17. Red or Pink? Red I guess -- well, shoot, this question is dumb too.
18. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I'm selfish and I can't wear funky shoes.
19. Who do you miss most? Everyone -- all my old friends and family live everywhere but here.
20. Do you want everyone you send this to, to send it back? Another dumb question
21. What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now? Grey sweatpants and pink t-shirt; okay so I guess it's pink, eh? Did I just say "eh". Before you know it I will be saying "out and about" and drinking "pop". Well I don't drink "pop" at all, but if I did, I would call it soda. If you don't know what you say for those caffeinated drinks fill in the blank ____ machine. If you say soda machine, you are normal, if you say coke machine you are from the south, and if you say pop machine, you are a northerner.
20. What are you listening to right now? Hubby's fish tank
23. Last thing you ate? A bowl of honey nut cheerios
24. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Blue but can I say this question is dumb too.
25. What is the weather like right now? Beautiful! Couldn't it look like this all the time!? It's about 60 degrees outside right now.
26. Last person you talked to on the phone? The nurse
27. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Umm, I have no idea, seriously. I've been with JB since I was 16.
28. Do you like the person who sent this to you? What am I going to say no? It's Kathleen!!!! Of course I do.
29. Favorite drink? Water really or ice cream (is that a drink?)
30. Favorite Sport? Volleyball
31. Hair Color? Blonde (darker the farther north I move)
32. Eye Color? Blue
33. Do you wear contacts? Yes and glasses. I wish I could wear my contacts more, but they dry my eyes out.
34. Favorite Food? Indian food
35. Last Movie You Watched? Carrie Grant in "My Girl Friday" & then "Hitch" with Jason and Kathleen
36. Favorite Day Of The Year? Another dumb question. I'll say Christmas, but this is really a dumb question.
37. Scary Movies Or Happy Endings? Happy endings! HATE scary movies!
38. Summer or winter? I refuse to answer this question!!!! If you don't know the answer you aren't close enough to me to deserve to read my blog.
39. Hugs OR Kisses? Hugs
40. What Is Your Favorite Dessert? Chocolate ice cream with oreo cookies in blizzard fashion from Dairy Queen or in Marble Slab/Cold Stone creamery fashion. We are on a sweet fast right now -- can you tell?
41. Who Is Least Likely To Respond? I'm not sending this to anyone -- I am posting it on my blog.
42. Who lives in your house? Wendi, John, Twaine and Monet (our birds) and some fish (not sure how many and I am refusing to get emotionally attached to fish so I am not going to name them.
43. What book are you reading? Water from the Rock.
44. Favorite Music? Christian and country
45. What Did You Watch Last night on TV? Ummm, that new Prison Break TV show. JB likes it. I am tolerating it. No, actually it is pretty good.
46. Favorite Smells? Chocolate ice cream. Does that smell? Well, any kind of chocolate smell then.
47. Favorite Sounds? The ocean. Oh geezie peezie I miss the ocean!
48. Rolling Stones or Beatles? I really don't like either of these groups. If I HAD to pick, I'd say the Beatles only because I know some of their songs. I don't have a clue what the Rolling Stones sing.
49. What's the furthermost you have been from home? Europe -- Switzerland, England, France and Italy. Which one is the farthest? Not sure.

So did you learn a lot about me? Oh and hey -- you readers can share too by posting in the comments section. Our friend Bara from Syria has that down -- what' s up with the rest of you? Good job Bara! Keep it up! Your American friends love you!

hangin' with family

Tuesday morning, Jason and Kathleen, left our Polar North home to return to good ol' Illinois. It was their first visit to Minnesota since we got here in 2003, and while Jason had been to Rochester to visit Josh & Justin when they played baseball for the Rochester Honkers once upon a time, Kathleen had never been to Rochester before.

The second part of the trip was filled with a visit to a local orchard where event hough we forget to bring cash or check, the wonderful owner said we could do what we liked and just "send him a check" later. We also spent the evening with the Rays for a fun Labor Day Cookout.

Long weekends like this make me so thankful for the wonderful family the Lord has blessed us with. I am also so thankful that Jason (who in Kentucky would evoke the locals to whisper "bless his heart") married such a wonderful woman like Kathleen. She definitely "completes him" and we are glad to have her as part of our family. I am sure that right now, Jason is sitting at his home six hours a way, with adorable Cullen on his knee, thinking something very sarcastic that he would say if he was sitting here next to me. But sine he isn't, I can write anything I want.

I look forward to November when we get to join the Huismans in Chicago for Thanksgiving.

Jason & Kathleen come to visit

Well, my cousin Jason and his wife Kathleen came in town to visit. They got here on Friday right after I got off of work. Friday evening Jb made Indian food. Saturday we walked to the Farmer's Market, then Jb made a great big breakfast, then we all took a nap, then we went to Chipotle, although I only had a few bites of Jason's ... I was still too full from breakfast to eat. We also got Jb some fish, picked me up some more allergy pills (I am wanting a good frost to come in and kill this pollen!) and picked up two movies. Then at 6:00 last night, Jb and I went over to my boss' house, Dr. K, where his wife made an all-out Indian meal! It was AMAZING! He has three kids and our friend Deola (who I connected with them to be their nanny) and her husband Tunde was there as well as a few other people. We had a wonderful time. At 10:00 we were going to have tea but we took off to go and watch "Guess Who?" It was pretty cute.


We are now on our way to the Mall of America. I will take a few pictures and post them up here tonite.

Okay, we just got back from the Mall of America. We got home, stopped at a new store in Rochester called "World Market" and then went for a run. We are now eating a ton of leftovers.

Enjoy the photos!

Hurricane Katrina

Next to 9-11, nothing in our country that I can be remember has been more traumatic than hurricane Katrina's devastation in New Orleans this past week. It has been breathtaking to say the least. There really isn't much I can say about it that all of you reading this haven't heard.

This catastrophe has made me realize that in America, we often rely on ... well, America. I think that I am not alone in the fact that I always thought we couldn't have a "tsunami" type occurrence in the United States. This is America! Land of the free; home of the brave! But here, in New Orleans, we realize again, we still need the Lord. We cannot do it without the Lord. We can't rely on our government or the Red Cross or people or weatherman. We can only rely on God. He is the stabilizing force.

If anything, this reminded me that "people need the Lord". Sometimes, in America, we are so blessed, we forget that.

Praying for The Big Easy tonite.

IVF Information

Well I heard back from the nurse at the IVF clinic. Apparently, I will be going in sometime in November for an appointment with the new physician. Then she said that right around January 1st, we should be doing IVF. Apparently the clinic is already reopened. They are seeing patients who currently have frozen embryos and also doing some IUI procedures (which I did 5 of), and then they will see the "old" patients who are "new" to IVF (me). We are excited to get some sort of date that we can get going.

We also talked to the woman in charge of paying for IVF. It appears that they will take the total cost and divide it by 24 months. This puts our payments and an amount Jb and I can afford WITHOUT taking out a student loan (figuring that it costs $10,000). We will also have to pay a "storage" fee for the embryos we need to keep frozen.

I must say that we are a place of total peace with IVF, however, I also have a sense of total trust that the Lord can change our direction and can also bless us with a natural pregnancy as well. I am also at peace with the fact that we aren't going to be able to conceive like everyone else. My friend Sam reminded me last night that our kid will only know how badly they weren't wanted -- so badly that we went to all this trouble.

We are getting excited for Jason & Kathleen coming in this weekend. We also just had homemade pizza at Dave & Lesley's. Jb was on the way to the grocery store when they invited us -- how wonderful to have a good friend like Lesley who cooks so well.

I will try to include more pictures this weekend when Jason & Kathleen are here. We can't wait to have company here in the Polar North!!

I am not a diabetic!

Oh my! I realized one of my pet peeves today -- having my time wasted. I have realized that this makes me furious.

I have been dealing with an infection that I can't get rid of. So I called Mayo today. I was told that I could receive the antibiotic for this infection just from my call. So I called. The nurse checked my record, asked me a few questions, and then told me that I didn't meet the criteria. Huh? What criteria? She didn't tell me which criteria I didn't meet. She just said, "You don't meet the criteria."

Okay, so now I have to physically go see my family practitioner. This takes 2 hours out of my workday. But I need to do it so I do. And after my doctor sits down, he looks at my complaints and says, "I don't understand why they just didn't fill this over the phone!" Huh? I tell him that the nurse said I didn't fit the criteria. He leaves to go to talk to the nurse. He comes back. "Well, you are on Metformin." Yes, I am. "Well, she thought you were a diabetic." Aaaaaaahhhh!!! I want to scream.

Now I understand that in 99.9999% of cases, Metformin is prescribed for diabetes. I understand that I am a rare specimen! However, she never asked me if I was a diabetic. I would have told her I wasn't a diabetic. Aaaaaaaahhhh!!! He says in the future to make sure I tell people that I am using Metformin for non-diabetic reasons. Diabetics don't fit the criteria.

So he filled the prescription. A prescription that could have been filled over the phone if I wasn't a supposed diabetic. Yikes! Now this doesn't seem like it should be a big deal, and it is for that reason that I have realized that one of my pet-peeves is having my time wasted.

That started me thinking about pet-peeves. What other peeves do I have? Well, here they are in no particular order.

1. Having my time wasted: see above!

2. Hotel sheets not having fitted sheets OR fitted mattress pads: This is a recent development. It saves time and space, and only requires one type of sheets. But I often wonder, am I the only person who wiggles around when they sleep (excessively my husband would add)? I mean, in the morning, I wake up, and the mattress pad is on one side, the bottom sheet on the other, and I am laying on the plain mattress. YUCK!

3. Getting home before I find out that my food order was incorrect: This happened once with my double chocolate and double oreo cookie chocolate blast from Sonic that I used to get JUST once a month when we lived right behind Sonic in Kentucky. I got all the way home only to discover it was reeses peanut butter instead of oreo! The horror! Sarah and Josh were forced to share in this with me. It was very depressing.

4. Being put on hold when there isn't any music or anything else: (am I on hold or did I get cut off?)

5. People who drive in the LEFT hand (FAST hand) lane on the highway: Oh man, this one really "irks" me. After I finally get by them, I pull a "George" and as I drive by I give them a look!

6. People who lick their fingers while serving cake or ice cream or any other food for that matter. I usually have to pass altogether because it just grosses me out. (Okay, yes, as most of you know I am a 'slight' germ-a-phobe, but I am working to improve this everyday. Today I left the public bathroom without using papertowels to hold open the door.)

7. Poor Grammar: Now, not all poor grammar mind you but a few chief irritators which go back into my teaching days. These include saying "suit" when you are talking about a bedroom "suite", mixing up the your/you're words, mixing up the "there/their/they're" words, writing "cause" when you mean "because", and saying "we was" or "she were" or any combination of the sort. Also, anything resembling Kentucky ignorance is difficult for me to stomach including my all-time classic student who wrote "you's" and then told me this mean "used to." Oh my!

8. Minnesotans who claim every winter I've experienced has been mild: Forget the fact that Rochester received the most snow EVER in a 24 hour period this past year, I still have no idea what a real winter is. All winters since I have arrived (never mind when that was) have been so mild and no slow was as thick or white or cold as the one before the year I got here (never mind when that was.) I will also add to this anyone saying "out and about" -- PLEASE don't use that phrase. It reminds me where I live.

9. People who sign things from their pets, give presents to their pets, or expect me to remember their pets birthdays: Now, please don't be offended because I know there are some of you who are reading this who fit into this category. I still love you, and I am sure if you made a top 10 list, I would fit into it somewhere as well. But I think this dumb -- I really do, and it's now time that you just knew it.

Well, that's all I got today. I am watching Karuna every Tuesday night now! I am excited about this ... last year it was every Thursday but that need was eliminated so now I have my Tuesday nites back. JB is currently at our friend Lisa Lightly's house who is a professional massage therapist. Afterwards, the three of us (JB, Karuna, and I) are going upstairs for dinner at Sam's house to celebrate Ajit moving out!

Infertility Update

Well, I am trying something a little different. Instead of sending my IF update via email, I am putting it here. You are welcome to post a comment for me if you would like or still send a return email if you would like. However, this blog gives me a way to "save" these messages so that I can look back at them. While I will send an email telling you that I have an update here, I will probably eventually stop doing that as well and when you want an update, you can just check in.

JB is on his OBGYN rotation and today he spoke in detail with one of the doctors on staff there. Basically they determined the following things:

1. I probably do NOT have PCOS. I have no blood work to indicate I have PCOS, no hair growth, and no acne. My testosterone is low. My LH and FSH levels are normal. It wasn't wrong for my RE (reproductive endocrinologist) to treat me like I did have PCOS. It wouldn't have changed any of the treatments we did except for trying the Metformin.

2. In order to manage long-term PCOS, the only thing I will have to do is take some sort of medication every 3-4 months.

3. In order to conceive, we should do IVF (invitro fertilization).

4. The IVF clinic has reopened for those patients who currently have frozen embryos. This mean I should be called to come in with the next month or two.

5. Because it doesn't appear we have any other issues, our chances of conceiving via IVF are very good. The chance of conception is somewhere around 30-40%. This is equal to the chance of a normal woman on any given month. The chance of twins is somewhere around 30-40% as well. These would be fraternal twins (2 different eggs), however, the chance of eggs splitting with IVF is higher than average as well. I did meet a woman who had triplets after only having 2 embryos put into her.

With that being said, JB and I have complete peace. We plan to do IVF when the clinic reopens. The only thing that would change this is if God did a miracle (which we believe He can do at any moment!) or if one of my doctors proposed another medication that was worth the try. We are open to this possibility.

However, we are at complete peace with IVF. We are both at a good place and both prepared for this step. IVF means that, in short, I will be given medications to force me to produce eggs. From there, they will go in surgically and remove these eggs. They will then fertilize these eggs in a laboratory and put 2 of these back in me (while we get to watch!) They will freeze the rest. We do not know how many they will actually be able to retrieve or how many we will choose to fertilize. We will 100% commit to return for every single embryo that we freeze. This is of utmost importance to us.

A possible good result of all this is that if we have frozen embryos, this can be a good reason to make a request of the Air Force to stay in Rochester during residency instead of relocating to another Air Force Base for Residency. Jb spoke to someone "in the know" who indicated that this was a possibility. It doesn't mean they will allow us to stay, but it means, we can make the request. We would like to avoid an extra move if we can, and the ability to stay here with so many good friends instead of relocating to a new city where we know no one all over again.

Thanks everyone. I hope this explained things well. Your continued prayers are so appreciated, but I do want you to know that I am doing very well, and actually feel better than I have felt in quite some time.

A day at the Fair

Yesterday (Saturday), Jb and I experienced, for the first and will probably be last time, the Minnesota State Fair. We went down to the fair with Tara who is in Jb's class (there are pictures of her in past journal entries) and a friend of her's, Brad. I am really glad we went and were able to experience the fair as Jb had never been to a state fair, and I think I had only been briefly to one in Illinois or Indiana over a decade ago with my dad and some of the Huismans. However, the fair is pretty expensive and pretty crowded so I think one experience is enough, but we did have a really fun time.

We have been on a sweet fast, but we decided to forego it for one day to experience the Fair in all it's glory. So we tried a lot of the legendary Fair food including FUDGE PUPPIES ON A STICK (thin Belgian waffles dipped in fudge, covered with whip cream and sprinkles). We also tried DEEP FRIED CANDYBARS ON A STICK. This is not something I am kidding about. They take a 3 musketeer bar (or other candy of your choice) and deep fry it. In my personal opinion, they totally ruined a good candybar. These were not horrible, but for 50 cents (instead of $3), you could buy a candybar out of a vending machine and it will taste better. I have never seen so many things deep fat fried (this includes, potatoes and eggs among other things) and so many things on a stick. You can even buy a t-shirt on a stick. Quite interesting!

I am enclosing two pictures. Unfortunately, we did not bring our digital camera and Tara's regular camera pictures won't be ready for awhile so I am enclosing a picture online that actually looks like how crowded this place was after lunchtime. We got there early. From 9-12, it was wonderful, but after lunch, the place became wall-to-wall people! Yikes!

The other picture I am enclosing is a picture of one of the animals we saw while we were there and really got a good laugh about. We saw every variety of horse, cow, sheep, rabbit, and pigeon you could imagine. We saw horses no bigger than Bronte' and horses whose backs were higher than John's head. We also got to see a bee exhibit which JB really enjoyed. I was terrifed for this man in the bee cage, but he didn't seem to be terrified at all as he picked this bees up for us to see!

The animals were wonderful but my allergies took a toll from all that hay. I had a full-on allergy attack! Sneezing, runny nose, inability to breathe without feeling like a feather was stuck up my nose. Not good.

We got home around 4:30 and Jb and I went and sat in the hot tub before I went to bed around 8:00. He watched Independence Day and I have no idea what time he came to bed -- maybe about 10:30.

It is now Sunday morning, and we are being very heathen-like by skipping church. I am just not feeling great and we would like to get a bunch of stuff done around the house. Jason & Kathleen are coming into town on Saturday! This will be tons of fun.

In other news, as I told most of you, my MRI was negative and did not show any pituitary tumor. So, will begin to look into some other possibilities. Your continued prayer is always appreciated.

Quick mid-week update

Well, here's a quick recap of what is going on in our lives currently:

• JB is on Obgyn surgery; so far this hasn't been too bad. Other people had told him it would mean extra long hours but he has only been on for the normal 8-5 days.
• My allergies are really wearing my out. I am sleeping a solid 9 hours a night but am just completely worn down. I am trying a different allergy medication and still can't quite get my energy level up to par. I actually resorted today to a Pepsi. I needed something to make it through the day. Lesley Jones said that her hubby Dave is struggling as well. Do I actually want winter to come?
• Speaking of Lesley Jones, she went with me to my MRI yesterday. It was a real blessing. JB couldn't go with me becaues of his rotation so Lesley, who is on her research rotation, volunteered to go with me. It was wonderful to have her with me and made me a lot less stressed. The MRI wasn't too bad, but I would prefer not to have to do it again.
• Found out this week that Ray & Gabbi and little Grace are coming up the first week of October! I can't wait! We also found out that Gabbi is having a boy. Very exciting. The news of them coming into town means a packed September and October with lots of company but we are excited. Jason & Kathleen are hoping to come for labor day, Kristi and baby Logan two weeks later, then Ray & Gabbi and then Mom and Dad Kit. the week after them.
• Work is going okay but I am ending up working 10 hour days lately. I am trying to work on my days being shorter but they have just ended up getting drawn out.
• We have decided to go to Chicago for Thanksgiving! Yay! Both Josh and Sarah and Jason and Kathleen are going to be with the Huismans this year and also my Uncle Ed and Tante Jan are home from Indonesia so it will be a fun time.
• Speaking of Ed and Janet, my cousin Eddie, their son and his wife Hannah had a son -- Gabriel Edward Kotynski.

Okay, that's all I got right now. I haven't gotten my results for my MRI but will post a new blog as soon as I get the results.

You don't want to see me now!

Well, it is 9:56 on Saturday morning. I would take a picture of myself to show you what I am doing right now, but it might just terrify you! I look pretty rough.

I woke up at about 5:15 again this morning sneezing. I have been waking up early a lot lately and think it is due to my allergies and just having way too much on my mind. I got up, caught my dad in Florida awake (although it was 6:15 there so he didn't need as big of an excuse), and the two of us went for 1 for 2 in spades. I watched my friend Tara Arness' gorgeous slide show of her trip to Peru (let me know if you want to see the show and I can email you the link) and decided that I needed a shower. I took a shower and crawled back into bed about 7:30 just as JB was getting out of bed, and now, a little before 10, I have just woken up again. He left a note that he went to the Farmer's Market -- an outdoor produce market on Saturday mornings. I would have loved to go with him because we can walk there, and the weather is just beautiful here right now, and we always have a nice time supporting the local farmers, but oh well, I missed it for my crazy sleep schedules.

As most of you know already, I did get my blood results yesterday from my recent infertility saga. I won't get into all the details here right, but please be praying for me. Yesterday I felt different than I have on most days of this journey. I often feel sad or angry but yesterday I just felt very emotionally spent and tired of it all. I didn't cry when the doctor gave me the news and didn't really cry when I discussed things with JB when I got home, but my eyes did just keep filling up with tears all night, and then the wave would subside and I would never really cry. I so love all of our dear friends and family and how wonderful they have been for me. I keep telling myself of all the ways that this journey could be worse! How many things I could list (including having to live in Arkansas I believe) that would rank worse than going through infertility treatments, but today, to be told they really don't know what is wrong with me was very disheartening. Do I have PCOS? Not sure. Do I have a tumor on my pituitary? Not sure. Do I have some sort of exercise-induced issue? Not sure. However, whatever my issue is, my endocrinologist feels that it goes deeper than infertility and needs to be figured out to deal with my life-long health, not just my current desire to have a family.

So, alas, I guess I am getting into things right now. Yesterday evening, JB was such a wonderful husband. As he cleaned his new fishtank (which looks great) we talked about where we were at. He told me that he thought I was doing a good job which meant so much to me. He is very honest and will tell me when I need to get myself together, quit crying, move on etc., but yesterday when he asked how I was and I said I was frustrated he laughed and said, "I don't have a clue why," and then he hugged me and said, "Well, you have every reason to be frustrated." And then he said that he thought I was handling the day's events very well and was emotionally ready for the MRI on Monday to check my pituitary.

Speaking of my pituitary, I must digress for a moment. After the doctor told me I needed an MRI on my pituitary, he told me his assistant would call me back to set up a time to do the MRI. She called back within minutes and told me to come in from 9:30-11:30 on Monday and to fast and to not wear anything metal, and then she said, "And we will be doing an MRI of your head and brain." Now, and please don't laugh (because JB laughed very hard), for some reason, I was thinking that my pituitary was in my stomach. I guess because of all this poking and probing of my ovaries and uterus and what-not. I am so relieved that milliseconds before I blurted out, "But I thought the MRI was for my pituitary," I realized the inaccuracies of my thoughts and remembered, somehow, that the pituitary was in your brain and kept my mouth closed. Had I said what I was thinking, I know that my statement would have ended up in that nurse's book someday that she is planning on writing entitled The Stupid things patients say.

Okay, had to interrupt my woe-is-me tale for a bit of humor.

Today, we are taking it easy. We will probably take a long bike ride later. Than we are going to go to church this evening as I am going to work form 8-12 tomorrow fro Mayo to get my boss and I caught up. JB is actually going to come in with me while I work so we can at least hang out together. He has some computer stuff to do anyways.

JB just walked through the door. Perfect timing. He bought me a beautiful vase of flowers from the Farmer's Market for 5$. Now that I can take a picture of. So here is JB with all his produce pickins' and my beautiful flowers!

No results

Well, went in for blood test today -- then my physician was out of town today so I didn't get the results. Praying that I can get them pretty quickly tomorrow -- bright and early would be great.

I had an allergy attack today! Not very much fun! Still sneezing like crazy. We also had Christo over for dinner tonite. Melissa and Karuna are in Nebraska where Melissa is from, and we didn't to leave him starving only a few blocks away. JB made him FAMOUS stuffed chicken! It was very good. Maybe I should have taken a picture of that.

So, it seems that my sister-in-law Gabbi and me will get results of our tests ON THE SAME DAY!!! How about that. Speaking of my sister-in-law Gabbi, she and Ray are expecting #2 in December. However, let it be said now, no one will be sweeter and more wonderful than my niece "Doctor Grace"!

The only other news was that when I left my house this morning for my blood test, I honestly thought that I need a light jacket! Oh no! What is happening here?!?!!? Winter Stay Away!