Dear God

Thought I would share just a fun blog of letters from children to God. How precious is this? I also thought I would share the last 20 visitors to my blog on Saturday night. How fun is that?

1) November 11, 2006 11:16 pm: Hartford, Wisconsin
2) November 11, 2006 9:44 pm: Chicago, Illinois
3) November 11, 2006 8:54 pm: Rochester, Minnesota
4) November 11, 2006 8:14 pm: Reston, Virginia
5) November 11, 2006 8:03 pm: Warren, Minnesota
6) November 11, 2006 7:20 pm: Herndon, Virginia
7) November 11, 2006 7:15 pm: Merrillville, Indiana
8) November 11, 2006 6:20 pm: Reston, Virginia
9) November 11, 2006 4:21 pm: Vancouver, British Columbia
10) November 11, 2006 4:15 pm: Pensacola, Florida
11) November 11, 2006 3:50 pm: Cheyenne, Wyoming
12) November 11, 2006 3:49 pm: Winona, Minnesota
13) November 11, 2006 3:45 pm: Denver, Colorado
14) November 11, 2006 3:36 pm: Vienna, Wien
15) November 11, 2006 3:13 pm: Bath, England
16) November 11, 2006 2:06 pm: Dubai, Dubai
17) November 11, 2006 12:44 pm: Mattapan, Massachusetts
18) November 11, 2006 12:13 pm: Boerne, Texas
19) November 11, 2006 8:02 am: Dhahran, Ash Sharqiyah
20) November 10, 2006 10:24 pm: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Peace

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace." Numbers 6:24-26 (courtesy of Tante Jan)

I have been so blessed by the amazing peace the Lord has brought to me during this time. As promised, JB continues to plan each day with an activity to help reinforce our sense of peace. Since this is "Dedication Sunday" at our church we wouldn't be attending church this week. We have always taken a Sunday off of church on Dedication Sunday and Mother's Day. Despite all our peace, we thought this was still a good idea.

We thought about going to Berean with our friends the Jones or the Philips, however, both couples are out of town. So, last night we went to a mass at the beautiful chapel in St. Mary's hospital. Afterward, we moved up to the front, sat and prayed, and just talked. We were the only one's there. It was so wonderful. We then came home, watched a movie, and JB made a great Mexican meal -- something we don't eat very often.

I am so amazed at how wonderful the peace of the Lord can be in your life. Even more than that, I am amazed what it feels like to really trust the Lord. I can honestly say, for the first time in my entire life, that no matter how this turns out, we are okay. I trust that HE has a PERFECT plan. And why wouldn't I want that perfect plan to come to pass in my life?

Each night JB and I pray together for our two babies carefully placed in my womb. We pray that they are still kicking and thriving away inside my womb. Each night we thank the Lord for the ability to have these two children with us, and we ask that He allows them to stay for nine months and for our lifetime! We are excited and trusting in the Lord -- that he is in control and a presence in our life.

My new friend Jenny is a friend of a friend. Her husband is a fighter pilot (I think that is the correct term) at Eglin Air Force Base, and we met for dinner while we were there. She had a prayer given to her when she was going through her years of infertility (she is now expecting through IVF!) She has passed this prayer along to me and promised to pray it for me.

When I awaken in the night I pray for you, and during times of the day when I see little ones and families I pray for you. I will tell you that from the beginning of all this, I have envisioned your womb -- as a safe receiving place. Even before we knew it would go this way, my visualization during prayer has been and is a "welcoming womb." Thus, this day is the day I have really been praying for all along. I DO believe your womb will be a safe and wondrous place these next nine months. Are you prepared for more than one Kit.? In addition to your womb -- I have had the strongest sense that PRAISE and thanksgiving are the vehicle that would usher in this answer to prayer. Praise is what we offer to our great God that in essence affirms that we believe Him and His word more than the circumstances. Life on this earth can be confusing--and painful. I see that you two have persisted in trusting God through the darkness and tortuous years of wanting and waiting. I know and believe it will be honored. Just think that Abraham and Sarah had to wait a very long time too. And, the Israelites left slavery for many years of wandering ... I see great Godly people in the Bible whose prayer answers came in unexpected ways ... and this is how it has been for you two too. I look so forward to hearing how this is all unfolding ....

I love this little passage and thank Jenny so much for sharing it with me.

I also wanted to tell all of you that were praying for Joanna the good news. She is PREGNANT! her BETA was 177. This is a pretty high number. She had three transferred so we just have to wait to see how many little ones stuck around. Congrats Joanna. What a great blessing.

Thank you all for your notes and encouragement. The morning of our transfer, we opened the front door to find a bag with goodies and a card hanging on the door. Another blessing and reminder that people are thinking of us. We are so blessed and so enjoying this time of waiting and prayer together.

I wish I could go back and have done the previous cycles feeling like I do now, but I realize that our Christian life is a journey, and we must work through that journey and grow. I have grown and can't wait to watch in which direction I continue to grow.

Blessings friends!

Snow, lights, and shots

Well, I don't know how much snow we ended up getting yesterday. Do any of you Rochester-residents know? It seemed to me that what we ended up with was a worse storm than what was forecasted. Apparently, most of the snow accidents of the year occur during the first big snow of the year. The story is that people forgot how to drive in the snow. And maybe all the Rochester-newbies are just lost and cursing their reason for coming here in the first place! I'm not sure. But I do know it snowed HARD all day. Whenever it snows during the day, the plows are unable to keep up on it. I had, foolishly, not worn boots to work and so on my way home at noon, had no choice but to walk through ankle deep snow which left my feet soaking wet. At least it wasn't a long walk.

Here are a few pictures of the snow. These pictures were taken at about 4:30. You can see that the sun was just getting ready to set. Sunset yesterday? 4:51!

JB told me that each day of this two week wait, we are going to try to do something relaxing and distracting to enjoy the days as we wait to get confirmation of my pregnancy results. I have decided that since we those sticky babies dropped in me and that they were alive, I am going to assume I am pregnant until told otherwise. It's a fairly fun feeling actually! And it keeps my spirits much higher!

Last night he took me to a light show about thirty minutes from Rochester. He said he had heard about this place and wanted to wait until it snowed before we went.

Okay, first of all, we had a GREAT time. It was wonderful to drive after the roads had been cleared and see the fresh snow and TONS of deer. We probably saw over 20 deer during our 30 minute ride.

The experience at the light show itself was, quite interesting. Here are a few pictures:

I think the thing is, for JB and I, we have been ruined by living in a big city. When you live in a huge city, and then you go to events like these in small, rural towns, you just can't help but be a little confused as to what all the fuss was about.

It's like going to a parade in New York City and then going to a parade in Rochester. You are confused if what you actually saw in Rochester would qualify as a parade? If you got candy, I guess it is considered a parade.

We drove around about ten different light displays sponsored by different businesses. Then we went inside and had a country buffet and watched a high school group perform a series of songs and dances. All we could say when it was over was that "Gracie (our niece) would have loved this." The shiny dresses and vests would thrill any young child, but for us, thirty minutes was quite enough, and we couldn't get some of the unfortunate songs out of our heads.

We also went through the world's only "light maze" which really wasn't much of a maze since all you had to do was follow people's footprints in the snow to find your way out! We passed on the lazer mini golf as it was basically covered with snow, but we did play foozball with a gumball which was quite entertaining. JB won both times, but he let me have the second gumball. I'm not sure how I felt about eating a gumball after playing foozball with it, but I decided to give it a go. It tasted like any other gumball and I am still alive so I guess I made the right decision.

Bara, remember the country fair Ronnie took you too? This was the same type of thing. The type of thing that reminds you America is a very big place, and there are some very different people living there! Very different people than the "city folks" which dominate television and the media.

We actually could have stayed until 9pm when they were showing the movie Cars in their auditorium, but I was getting tired. I really felt drugged yesterday. My boss at Mayo even said so, and when I told him how much Valium they gave me on Thursday, commented that I probably had a pretty good doozy of a Valium hangover.

Instead we came home, JB gave me my shot, and we went to bed.

Now I want to pause briefly to talk about my progesterone shots. I'm going to talk about this one time, and then, I am going to refrain from complaining about them again.

The progesterone shots hurt worse this time than they EVER have before! My only deduction as to the reason why is because the clumps of progesterone from my September cycle are still present. JB actually said he saw an interview with a woman who NINE MONTHS after she took the shots still felt the clumps! Yikes! I know this could be possible because even a few weeks ago when I would jog, I would have to wear spandex to attempt to keep the clumps from shaking too much when I run. They hurt so badly.

Now, the problem is, I am taking shots on top of the old clumps. John is forced to practically sit on my legs when he gives me the shots to prevent me from jumping! They stink.

I put a post about this on Hannah's Prayer, my online discussion board. Here's what I wrote:

This is now my third time with progesterone shots. However, these are MUCH worse than previously. I am wondering if this is due to the close proximity to which I last took shots? The first set were in May, then September and now November. Do you think the leftover "clumps" are the problem?

I received two replies that seemed to echo my "theory".

Yes. Having "been there", I can tell you that it can take A LONG TIME for that area to heal...definitely months and months. I found that the lumps/rashes/etc. came much more easily with each new cycle. And it took awhile before the "itching" stopped and I had full sensation again. My progesterone schedule was May (only 5 days since transfer was cancelled), July (full 2ww), September (only a couple days since transfer was cancelled), November (only 5 days of it then since my transfer was cancelled), March to June.

-----

I think you might be right. After my transfer in May I felt residual pains either in my mind or real for months. This time some shots are better than others. I really think when they hurt it is because they went through a 'clump'. Today both sides are sore so I'm going to spend the evening alternating the heat pad side to side and have dh try to massage the area ( sounds funny!). Each morning I get the ice out and stand in front of the mirror backwards to pick the spot...I depress the spot with my thumb to see if it hurts, and if not ice it there....sometimes it's hard to find a spot. Then I climb in bed either on my side with my right hip exposed or on my stomach mostly for my left hip and try to breathe and relax! Do other people do shots lieing down?

So these two comments encouraged me that I am not out of my mind! I guess I am not the only one who finds these annoying.

Okay, that's it. I refuse to complain anymore about the shots. You know I am taking them every evening, and you know they stink. I'll leave it at that.

Right now it is Saturday morning, and JB is back in the hospital working on some other women's procedures. We plan to lay low today. My house is absolutely trashed, but I am trying not to worry about it so that I continue to lay low.

See you all tomorrow!

Wendi reporting in

So here I am, back at my blog. JB did a great job recapping everything that happened yesterday. It was a long day, but a very restful and peaceful day. My goal, from the moment I left for acupuncture, was to stay relaxed and at peace, and the Lord blessed me with just that.

During my 9:30 acupuncture appointment, he puts the needles in the correct places, and then leaves for 25 minutes. It was then that I started the relaxation segment of my Nanopod that JB made for me. It is a mix of relaxation music, relaxation imagery, and passive muscle relaxation. The music is great when my mind is quiet. When I need to quiet my mind down, I would put on the imagery and passive muscle selection. These talk you through helping your body to relax and distract you enough to get rid of any worrisome thoughts. In between this and during this, I prayed a lot too.

Our taxidriver Ebby picked us up from acupuncture and took us to the hospital. Being as this was fourth time I have been on this same outpatient floor, I was a little unnerved when they brought us to a room for multiple patients. The TV was on loud, it was very bright, and there were not beds, only lounge chairs for the patients. However, I think I did a great job not worrying about it, even when the nurse told me that it was so busy that I might have to spend my hour on bed rest following the procedure on a cart in the hall. I was determined to stay relaxed and not get worried.

JB said they woke me up to give me my Valium. That I don't recall, but I do remember having to be shook awake after taking that pill when a nurse came by to prick my finger. I couldn't figure this out. This had never happened before, but I, fairly woozy, complied. A little while later another nurse emerged telling me what my blood sugar was and asking me if I needed some juice or something. What? "I'm not diabetic," I repeated for the ump-teenth time. Yet again, they had seen my medication list, which included Metformin (a diabetic drug), and assumed I was a diabetic. The nurse apologized for the unnecessary finger prick and left me to sleep again.

A little while after that I was woken up again. The nurse told me that a room had opened up, and I could have it! I was thrilled. I changed rooms and emptied my bladder again even though I wasn't supposed to. It was only 11:30, and I just wasn't thinking I could wait three hours. During this time, my feet cramps did start to return. JB did a great job trying to work them out of my feet. We are pretty convinced that, for whatever reason, it is the Valium that is causing these to come on so strongly. Both times I have been on the Valium, I have been struck with them.

Once in the pre-op area, I completely konked out again. I went from "breathing in and out" with my CD to hearing some sort of opera music and having a nurse standing over me once again asking me to spell my name. I told JB I was going to refuse to spell my name all day! You see, you get asked, about 10 times, to please spell your full name (our last name is long) and tell them your birthday. Then you are supposed to tell them what they are going to be doing that day. I know it is for safety measures, but it does get a little humorous. I also remember having trouble spelling or remembering what they were doing while "under the influence."

While I slept over an hour in the pre-op area, poor JB was left to sit there, with no book, no one to talk to. I thought it had only been a few minutes, but apparently, it had been enough to really leave him bored.

The procedure itself was a BREEZE. And, my bladder was full enough. (But not full that I was going crazy having to go to the bathroom.) It went so wonderfully smooth with very little pain at all. The embryologist came out and told us that our two sticky babies were doing very well. She said the third embryo was doing just "okay". I will have to call and see if the little guy/gal pulled through. If not, we will have a total of ten stick babies waiting.

I did get a cramp in the middle of the procedure, but one of the nice nurses helped me work it out. It really wasn't a big deal. The hardest part of the procedure this time was, well, honestly, being so exposed with so many people coming in and out. But as I told everyone, I have come to terms with my nudity. I have given up worrying who sees me naked. I am long past that.

After the procedure, I, surprise, fell asleep again. An hour later, it was time to go. I changed clothes and Dr. H. came to see me. As JB mentioned briefly yesterday, they are doing a study, and she wanted to know if I wanted to be in the study. Basically, if my pregnancy test is positive, I will do seven blood draws and seven ultrasounds during the first month of my pregnancy. This is a lot, but we think it will be pretty cool to get seven free ultrasounds.

Dr. H. asking me to be in the study also reminded me that they do believe I can and may be pregnant in two weeks. I do believe that too. I am refusing to let myself get sad or worried during the next two weeks. What is the point? Instead I am going to trust God for a healthy pregnancy and go on about my merry way. I can control nothing so I will not attempt to control anything. It's a refreshing outlook after two previous attempts filled with sheer frustration.

Ebby picked us up from there and brought me back to acupuncture and then back to our house where I spent the evening chilling on the couch, watching Survivor and a few other shows that meant nothing to me ... just trying to stay down and relaxed.

As I sit at my computer this morning and look out the window, I am seeing the start of what is supposd to be up to 4" of snow today. 4" of snow after 78 degree temperatures just two days ago. Go figure.

Also, if you think of it, please pray for my friend Joanna who gets her pregnancy test (we call them "BETAS") back today after her transfer. Can't wait for the good news Joanna!

Lots of waiting for a great transfer

This is JB again filling in for the resting Wendi.

The day went very well.

6:30 We woke up. We didn't need to get up so early, but we are so used to it.
9:30 We walked over to the accupuncturist for a 25 minute session.
10:00 Ebby picked us up and drove us to the hospital.
10:15 Checked in to the hospital.
10:30 Escorted to our shared room - 3 lazy boys curtained off from each other - things were busy there. Not real relaxing, but Wendi had her ipod with relaxing tunes on.
10:45 Wendi received her valium. 'nite 'nite Wendi.
11:30 We were moved to a private room since things cleared out a bit. Much nicer.
12:30 Wendi was rolled down to the pre-op area. I got to tag along.
1:20 We went to the OR.
1:40 Two little embryos were transferred! (This went SO much more smoothly than last time.)
1:45 Wendi was rolled back to the post-op area.
1:50 We returned to our room.
2:40 The hour of "you need to lie flat" was over.
2:45 One of the doctors came in to say goodbye and asked if Wendi wanted to be in a study when she has a positive pregnancy test in about 2 weeks. She said yes, and I'll let her tell you about it.
3:00 Ebby met us outside the hospital.
3:15 We returned to the acupuncturist for another 25 minutes session.
3:45 Ebby drove us back to our condo.
4:00 Wendi had me make her some food since all she ate today was a little fruit and some toast.

I think that was it.

I'm sure Wendi will return very soon.

Something new I tried -- how cool is this?

Don't be offended if you aren't in the pictures. I was just trying it and grabbed pictures randomly from my files. I'll make one "with meaning" some other time.

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

Thinking

Today I am thinking about not getting any cramps in my feet. Last night I woke up 4-5 times with cramps in my feet. I haven't had them for weeks. This has to be psychological. I want to stay relaxed. I don't want to jump around the room again.

I am also thinking about the Valium. On Monday, I asked Dr. H. if she would consider giving me more Valium. I'm 6'3" after all! No go. She said the dosage is standard. Bummer.

On the topic of thinking, I am thinking about my full bladder. Once I get to the hospital at 10:30, they don't want me to go to the bathroom again. In theory, this sounds easy. The problem is, I probably won't get in for my transfer until noon. Then, after my transfer, I am on bed rest for another hour again. (If I asked to go to the bathroom they point to a bedpan. No thank you.) That's two and a half hours for a girl who goes to the bathroom fairly frequently. Anyways, I am not sure how closely I am going to follow that rule. I don't want to be catheterized again, but you know, it wasn't that bad. At least they emptied my bladder after they filled it up. So I'll try to keep it semi-full, but I just can't torture myself if I want to stay relaxed.

I am also doing a lot of thinking about our sticky babies Nine of them are now frozen with their one other brother/sister. That is ten. However, three are waiting for today. Hopefully two look really good for transfer, and the third, called the "blastocyst" has also made it. Last time our blast didn't make it. This blast is being frozen at a "later date" than the other nine. This is thought to improve success rates and will be used "down the line" as an "ace up the sleeve."

Thinking about ... relaxation. As for being relaxed, I really am. I really feel great! Well my stomach still hurts, and I am still pretty stinkin' bloated, but I really do feel emotionally great, and I think the acupuncture before and after and tons of prayer will only help! I am thanking the Lord everyday for giving me the peace I needed to do this again.

Either JB or I will update the blog later on today.

78 and super glue!

Okay, so today, it was 78! If it wasn't for the fact that it was nearly dark by the time I got home from work, I think I would have found a patch of grass and attempted a suntan. They said the normal high for this time of year is 42. Amazing.

I soooooo wanted to go for a run. Actually, I have been going through exercise-withdraw BIGTIME. Exercise is so emotionally good for me, and I miss it. I can't do ANYTHING. Heck, rolling over to stand up isn't easy. I actually had a dream last night that I was swimming -- like full out swimming and sweating, and I was so happy to be exercising. I don't ever really swim. I'm not sure where that came from. Anyways, hopefully my exercise will be limited for quite a bit of time.

I also wanted to give a "comment of the month". Rachel made the comment:

"Sending super glue thoughts to those little babies! tomorrow is YOUR day to STICK!"

I love it! That was hilarious! JB and I laughed out loud. Thanks so much Rachel. Your friendship, support, and encouragement has been greatly valued. (P.S., you were right about the socks!)

Also, I wanted to ask you all to please help me during the two week wait that follows tomorrow's procedure. If you can avoid asking me or even LETTING me talk about future things "we could do" if this doesn't work, I would appreciate it. Obviously, we still have a lot of options, but I have realized that I just can't let myself "go there" right now, or I will lose my positive outlook and peace about where we are right now. Don't feel bad if you HAVE said something to me. I really WANT to talk about it, and I probably started the conversation or egged it on. However, in talking to JB tonight, I realized I needed to avoid going down this path. I will think about "what I should do next" when that thought needs to be thunk. So, please help me only think the good thunks.

See you tomorrow!

10:30

Thursdays are the day that they do all the FET's (Frozen Embryos Transfers) at Mayo so my fresh one fell on a bad day. I don't go in until 10:30 tomorrow morning. I am one of many. My acupuncture appointment is set for 9:30 with a follow-up after I get off of bedrest that afternoon. We'll update again soon.

It's Wednesday -- tomorrow's the transfer

Tuesday was a good day. I worked from home the entire day and only left the house to go and vote (DID YOU VOTE?!?) and then go to acupuncture in the evening. We also went and had Indian for dinner. We have not had reason to celebrate very much during this infertility journey, and we thought that twelve fertilized embryos was a great reason to celebrate. By the end of dinner, I was wiped out and had probably pushed a little too much. I fell asleep a little after 8.

We now wait to hear how those twelve did and are doing. Hopefully, we will find out tomorrow that all twelve are still thriving. However, we continue to trust the Lord with His perfect number.

So tomorrow is the transfer. We will find out later this evening what time we are supposed to report to the hospital for the procedure. Once we find that out, I will call our acupuncturist to set up our appointment there. JB and I will walk over to our acupuncture appointment one hour before our hospital check-in time. Then, our dear friend Ebby has agreed to be our "shuttle". She'll drive us to the hospital, then pick us up from the hospital, and then take me back to the acupuncturist after the hospital visit. It will be a busy morning. Hopefully, by noon, I will be back at home resting comfortably.

I had one day off (Monday) from any shots, however, that is a stretch because I had to get an IV started which is totally worse than any shot you can get. I am done with lupron and gonal but am now back to the granddaddy of shots -- the progesterone. I take these in my lower back every evening until our pregnancy tests. If I am pregnant, I take them for another 6-8 weeks. The reason? Normally, women who get pregnant on their own, have leftover follicles which release progesterone which is necessary to prevent miscarriage. I don't have any leftover follicles to emit that progesterone so I must take it artificially. There are oral and suppository versions of progesterone. However, the shot is the most reliable, and therefore the mode of choice in most RE offices. Women who wait this long to get pregnant gladly comply. So ... I take the shots.

I am going to go to work at Mayo today. I wasn't sure I'd be able to but am feeling pretty good. I'll probably take a long break midday and maybe leave early. I won't work tomorrow at all.

We will, of course, post updates as they become available. Thank you for all your encouragement and support. You guys rock!

The real fertilization report

Okay, sorry to trick some of you on that earlier post. It was too much to resist.

The results are REALLY in this time.

We got 12! 12 fertilized! Combined with our previous 1 we have 13. We are very, very happy with this result. This is actually higher than the norm of 70%. I am too excited to figure out what this percentage is, but we are very happy with it.

Please pray for these 12. We need them to keep growing and dividing correctly.

YAY!!!!

The message was actually left at 6:30 this morning! I've been waiting all this time, and it was on the board the whole time. The messages usually come later in the day so I didn't bother checking. I am so happy. I spoke with JB for a few seconds. He is very happy as well.

Thursday, here we come.

The fertilization report ...

Well, the fertilization report ...

is not in yet. Did I trick you?! Ha ha. Welcome to my world.

Lots of waiting.

I'm back

Hi folks! I'm back. Thank you for all the prayers, love, and encouragement. Yesterday went very smoothly.

JB recapped from his perspective yesterday. Here's a brief recap from mine.

Even yesterday morning, I noticed a big difference from last harvest. By this point in the last cycle, I was unable to walk I hurt so badly. This time, I was uncomfortable and bloated but not hurting nearly as badly.

We checked in at 6:30 and by 7:15 they were wheeling me down to the pre-op area. I had been trying to keep my bladder semi-full, but by 8:15 was going crazy! Apparently Mondays get a late start because of morning conferences so there were a lot of people waiting around. I finally told a passing nurse that I had to use the bathroom. She made a phone call, and they agreed to let me empty my bladder. That may have meant they had to catheterize me, but you know what? I didn't care. I would be asleep when they did that so what did I care?

One of the residents, a very sweet new Doctor H., stopped by. She spoke with me briefly. Then, Dr. C. came by. He has been out of town, and I was thrilled he was doing my procedure. I really like him. He actually talked to me briefly about a new idea.

Doctors all over the world have been attempting to freeze eggs. It would solve a lot of problems. It would help deal with the ethical issues of freezing embryos. And it would help unmarried women and young girls battling cancer preserve their eggs until they met someone they wanted to use them with. However, the thaw rate for eggs has always been very bad (somewhere around 1-2%). When you consider that the thaw rate for embryos at Mayo is in the 90's or so, this rate is nearly unacceptable.

Dr. C told me that he has been working on a way to freeze eggs that is yielding a rate of more like 30%. It is my belief that in the next 10 years, this will be how IVF is done so couples don't have to battle ethical issues. This would be a great accomplishment and would eliminate all the unused embryos out there. He asked me if he could try to freeze any eggs that they got over the "magic number" 14. I of course agreed. He even said that I wouldn't have to pay for this. This would mean that we could "choose" to fertilize one of the eggs later if we wanted.

Unfortunately, they weren't able to get the necessary equipment together in time to pull this off (he had just come back from out of town). However, this is exciting for other women and even for myself if I were to ever do another harvest.

Anyways, from there I was wheeled into the operating room. I remember someone complimenting me on my glasses. They always love my glasses in the operating room. Then someone took my glasses from me. I remember trying to help the guy put the boots on my legs and him telling me that he could handle it. I remember having the IV started, the oxygen mask put over my face, and that cold sensation go up over my arm. I then remember telling someone that I was getting very sleepy.

The next thing I remember was being back in my room with JB and two nurses. I remember having to go to the bathroom very badly, but I have no recollection of crying or any of the other things JB told you. Apparently, we later learned that this particular anesthesiologist used a different drug combo which may have been the reason I was so drunk this time and not so drunk last time. Either way, I do remember wanting to communicate but feeling like I couldn't. It was quite strange.

Lesley picked us up close to noon, and we stopped for some gyros before heading home. JB got me settled and then headed into the clinic. I had the phone by me and Lesley upstairs for any emergencies, but when you fell asleep as hard as I did, there weren't really any emergencies.

Since then, I have been doing GREAT. Last cycle I had pretty terrible pain that first day and night -- to the point that I contemplated a trip to the ER to get more pain medicine. This time, however, my pain was very minimal. I did take two tylenol-3's, but otherwise, felt pretty good and was getting up and down without too much difficulty.

Now comes the wait until I find out today how many of my eggs successfully fertilized. As soon as I get this information, I will update it on the blog. We are blessed by every egg that fertilizes and I hesitate to say how many I hope for because I have many IVF friends who only had a few eggs to start with. Instead, I have to ask the Lord to pick the perfect number. I would hope, however, to have at least 4 more tries with this harvest.

JB mentioned something yesterday about fertilization. It is a good point to understand that Mayo actually freezes embryos before the point, that they believe, DNA transfer has occurred. This would mean, that, to put it bluntly, the sperm is hanging on outside the shell of the egg but not inside it yet. However, as soon as these are thawed, they begin to have genetic transfer occur. There is some "greyness" to whether we need to worry about "excess embryos" when they may not technically be "life" yet. For JB and I, we have just decided to assume that each embryo is fully life. By the time they are transferred back into me, they definitely have had this transfer occur. Either way, we have always said we will not compromise our values for something we want. We therefore feel that the only correct thing for us to do, is make sure we can go back for each and every embryo. We feel good about that decision.

Okay, stay tuned for fertilization report! I plan to work from home today so as soon as the call comes in, I'll share it with you.

She's Back!

Okay, okay, okay. I am sorry this took so long to update, but I was at work!
This is JB by the way.

So, I'll give the abbreviated play-by-play:
- We checked in at 6:30 a.m.
- They took Wendi to the pre-op area at about 7:15.
- She waited in there for quite a while - until close to 8:15 or so - and was then brought to the operating room.
- They retrieved 18 eggs.
- She went back to the recovery room and then was rolled back to her room, where I was waiting watching the movie National Treasure, at about 10:00 a.m.

Now let me tell you something, Wendi has never been drunk before, but if you ever wanted to see what that would be like, you should have been there today. She was GONE! Slurred speech, laughing, crying, sleeping... all at the same time. She started talking to the nurse and then realized she was not me, and she said to the nurse, "Oooooohhhh, I thought you were my husband... but you're still really pretty." Then she was told to scoot over from the transport bed to her room bed. She looked at the room bed questioningly, turned to the nurses, and said, "I am really naked! Ha! Ha!" Well, under her gown she was, but apparently this was throwing off her ability to move. When she was finally tucked in, she turned to me crying a little and said, "I know what I want to say, but I sound like a complete moron."

Let me say that she knows I am writing this. I am not a mean guy that likes to share with the world how funny my wife is when she is drugged, although I am enjoying this immensely.

So where are we now?

At this point we do not know how many of the 18 eggs are mature, but we will find out tomorrow. Oh, and we have decided to do what we did last time and fertilize 14 of the eggs. This means that tomorrow, the embryologist will determine how many of the 14 actually fertilized (this is typically from between 5-12). He will take two of them and let them grow for another 2 days for the "put back", or transfer, on Thursday. The other remaining embryos will be frozen tomorrow.

Now Mayo is one of the only places that does freezing in the pronuclear phase of embryo development. What does that mean? There are actually 2 phases of what most people call "fertilization". The first stage, actually called fertilization, is where the sperm penetrates the outer "shell", or zona pellucida, of the egg. The second stage, called syngamy, is where the genetic material actually combines to make a new set of genes - i.e. our baby's genetic code. Mayo freezes the embryos after fertilization but before syngamy, the so-called pro-nuclear phase. Just thought that was interesting information for those who cared. :)

Anyway, Wendi is doing well. She slept most of the afternoon and has less pain than she did for the first transfer. I am pretty happy about this. It is terrible to see someone you love in pain... plus the whining is ridiculous! Just kidding. Kind of.

Wendi will be blogging again soon. I promise.

Open House for Keith & AD

My mom just sent me the pictures of Keith & AD's open house. As my mom noted in her email, some of the people that worked the hardest (Debbie who hosted the party, Marty, and my parents) aren't in many pictures. However, you get th idea! I wanted to put these on there so that my mom can send this link to anyone that she wants and show them the openhouse.

I would tell you who everyone is, but I don't recognize everyone so I'll pinpoint a few I know.

This is my brother, Keith on the left. My mother-in-law is on the right. I have been told that the center couple are AD's grandparents. I have never met them. Or not yet anyways.

From left: Gabbi, Grace, Ray, Nate, Dad (all Kits.)

I know everyone here. There's good old Eddie on the left, AD, Keith, and the Bramos'


This is Mr. and Mrs. Monroe. I played volleyball and basketball with Megan Monroe.

I recognize Julie Eckert? on the left. I can't quite make out the right. My mother has informed me that the young girl on the right is Julie's daughter. She was like 8 when I last saw her. Oh my.

Friends I don't know (or at least I don't think I know). I heard these are new teachers at FLCS. Again, they are younger than me. I am aging as we speak.

More beautiful friends. Sharon Watt and Verona Honey

More beautiful food

Debbie's beautiful house

Is that Carrie Holmes? Oh my, everyone got old while I have been gone. I'm not sure. Carrie Holmes is a supermodel!

Angie and AD

There's one picture of Debbie the magnificent on the right.

AD taking a picture of her parents whom I have never met.

Monday's song

It is about 6pm on Sunday night. I'm starting to feel a tad nervous. I have to be there at 6:30 tomorrow morning. Hopefully JB can post later on to let you know how things went. I guess I don't have to even ask you to be praying today.

Here is a song of the week, a day early. Enjoy! As always, you can click to listen to this out to the side.

Seven Places -- Even When
This week, I prayed, one time
My phone, it rang, I put You on the other line
And now my thoughts they drift around
My knees remain unacquainted with the ground
Unless my faith is put to the test and I am forced to bow
Although I'm in this flesh it doesn't mean You shouldn't have the best
from me, from me

[Chorus:]
Even when my eyes are dry
even when my soul is tired
even when my hands are heavy, I will lift them up to You
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You (oh)
I exist for youI close my eyes but all I see

I close my eyes but all I see
Is a background of black, bouncy squiggly lines
And this week's mistakes coming back to mind but
I will lift my voice and make a joyful sound
Forget about me, I only get me down
Although I cannot see it doesn't mean I shouldn't sing to You, to You

Even when my eyes are dry
even when my soul is tiredeven when my hands are heavy, I will lift them up to You
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You (oh)
I exist for you

You've given me Your life and have held mine together yet I find
Excuses to slouch in my pew
But when glory divine
Is sitting in my very presence, the least that I can do
Is give my all to You, give my all to You,
ohEven when my eyes are dry(even when my soul is tired)

even when my hands are heavy, I
will lift them up to You
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You (oh)
I exist for you

Even when my eyes are dry,
even when my soul is so tired
I won't leave my hands down by my side,
I'll lift them up to You
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You (oh)

'Cause you are here for me
This is what I was made to do (oh)(I exist for you)

Tomorrow's the day

Tomorrow is the harvest? Can you believe it? I can't believe it, and wouldn't believe it if it weren't the fact that my stomach is about to explode! Yikes!

I also had to take my HCG shot at exactly 10:00pm last night. This shot causes the eggs (which are inside the follicles) to start to release. They will release 36 hours after the shot. This would be at about 10am on Monday morning. This is the reason that I am going in at 7am on Monday morning, just when they are about to let go. How amazing is that? It still blows me away that they can do this.

Anyways, the HCG was intramuscular in my thigh. The shot stunk. I did not enjoy it at all. I don't remember my previous HCG shots hurting so badly. This HCG actually causes women to have a positive pregnancy test. The reason is that the HCG they give you to release the eggs is actually the same drug they measure a positive pregnancy test with.

I have been tempted in the past to take a test during the next few days while this HCG is still in my system and before the hopefully new HCG from a pregnancy enters my system just to see two lines on a pregnancy test. I'd like to at least know what that looks like.

In other news:

Today, my mother is hosting an open house for my brother and his fiancee'. I wish I could have been there. They are also going to ask my niece, Grace, to be the flower girl. Grace is obsessed with weddings, and I so wish I could see her face when they ask her! Grace's mom (Gabbi) was on the phone with my soon to be sister-in-law AD the other day. When she got off the phone, Grace asked Gabbi who she was talking to, and when Gabbi said it was Keith and AD, Grace immediately asked who their flower girl was going to be! Of course, Gabbi didn't tell her in order to preserve the surprise.

I also wanted to share some pictures from our night of bowling on Friday night. It was organized through our Bible Study, the CMDA. Well, I didn't bowl as I am currently focusing on walking, but everyone else did. So here they are. You can see even better pictures on Kristen's blog.

Tara, Setty, Wendi, Lesley, Kristen and Cole

Dave, Santiago, Brandon, Setty, JB, and Justin. Setty is with the men because she beat every single one of them with her 152! Go Setty!

Lelsey and Kristen

Setty and Justin

Cole and Tara

I also wanted to introduce an amazing game to you. It is called 20Q. 20Q: The Little Ball That Will Beat You At 20 Questions. Cole brought this game with him to the Bowling Alley. This thing is amazing. Brandon picked "Scalpel" and 20 questions later, up it came on the screen.

Now it is not right all the time. I picked "fuzz" and it finally guessed "booger", but about 80% of the time, the machine is right. Quite an amazing time.

It's a go!

So if this is the first time you are checking the blog today, I suggest you scroll down to the first post of the morning and work your way up. Otherwise this may be confusing.

Here is my follicle count from today:

1 - 20.5
1 - 20.0
1 - 18.5
2 - 18.0
1 - 17.5
1 - 17.0
4 - 16.5
1 - 16.0
1 - 15.5
3 - 15.0
2 - 14.5
2 - 14.0
2 - 13.5
2 - 13.0
3 - 12.5

The doctor this morning was a bit worried about hyperstimulation (OHSS), but they said they are no longer concerned after getting my estradial numbers back. This means we are good to go!

We will harvest on Monday morning. I have a 6:30 a.m. report time. Unless they find something unusual when they go to get the eggs, we will return for a FRESH TRANSFER (YEAHHHHHHhhhhh!) on Thursday. I am so happy. I was really not getting down and was still feeling positive and upbeat, but thinking of not getting to do the fresh transfer, take a month off, and then take all the meds to build my lining back up was not exciting me. We also have a big trip for Christmas already scheduled and didn't want to have to rearrange things. Also, fresh transfers have a slightly higher success rate (not a whole lot at Mayo -- their frozen rates are very high as well), so I didn't want to lose this option. Now, it doesn't look like I have.

As for me, folks, I am as bloated as can be. I have put on ten pounds of bloat. I am not exaggerating. Ten pounds! Well, at least I hope it is bloat. JB explained that my walnut-sized ovaries are probably now fist size. Sunday can't get here early enough.

I was also blessed today by a dear friend who dropped off a "Pamper Yourself & Relax" box. I won't give her name away in case she wants to remain anonymous but this box was awesome. I currently have the soft socks on, JB is going to pick me up some Panera for lunch, and then, as instructed, we are going to watch one of the movies on the couch! Thank you dear friend. I almost started to cry when I looked in the box. What a gift you have for knowing exactly what a girl needs.

This is it folks. Pray like crazy!

Quick prayer request

If you happen to read this blog today, please say a prayer that my estradial doesn't get too high. The doctor at my ultrasound this a.m. was slightly concerned about hyperstimulation. This would mean that they would do the harvest but would not do a fresh transfer. They would instead give me a month off to "cool down" and then do a frozen embryo transfer. We want to do a fresh but hyperstimulation is dangerous, and if I get pregnant, can land me in the hospital for a good bit of time.

We want my estradial to not have gone much above doubling. Yesterday it was around 1600. We want to stay close to 3200. I had a TON of follicles and they were mature. I'll post the details when I get them, but I think we will be going on Monday for sure. The prayer is that we can return on Thursday.

It's Saturday morning! Time for more fun!

What better to do at 7am on a Saturday morning then get my blood drawn and have an ultrasound. It's amazing to me that with a few of my IUI's I did this six days in a row. I'm at three and worn out. Of course, my body feels a lot different with IVF than it did with IUI's.

I'm also a little more nervous on the weekends. The woman who usually does the ultrasounds is not there on the weekends. She is really good at them, and this whole round has been a lot less painful than my last harvest when she was out of town. She is so fast and does this so many times per day. It's one thing to be uncomfortable or in pain for 15 minutes. If you get into the 30 minute range, you start to run out of relaxing beaches to sit on.

Yesterday, while she was doing my ultrasound, I was lying there, doing my best to focus on my relaxing imagery. It's fairly random when the whole experience hurts. My ovaries are so swollen that there is no telling when they will hit something that is tender. Suddenly, they hit something that was tender, and I jumped. She immediately asked me to picture a beach and without even thinking I quipped, "I was picturing a beach. You ruined the image!" We all got a laugh out of this. I'm glad she has my same sarcastic sense of humor.

Cole is hanging out with us this weekend. It's his parents fifteenth wedding anniversary. So last night, a bunch of us from our CMDA (Christian Medical and Dental Association) Bible Study went bowling, and Cole went with us. He is sleeping on the couch right now. He swore he'd be up at 6:00am. I knew better. Lovely Lesley has agreed to watch him while we go for our 7am appointment.

I thought about bringing Cole with and letting him sit in the waiting room, but as my HP (Hannah's Prayer) and HLH (Hearts like Hannah) sisters have told me many times, bringing children to infertility appointments is like bringing brownies to Weight Watchers. It's like DUH! I thought about bringing Cole and strapping a sign to him that reads: "They are just babysitting me!" but thought that might make him a little self-conscience. Either way, we opted to solicit Lesley's help.

Speaking of Les, I need to go call her. I'll update throughout the day. We should find out by late afternoon if we are going in on Monday or not.

Ummm, another .... update

Okay, so I am progressing. My estradial was now at 1622. Thursday it was 966 so I told you this can move quickly (over 2000 is technically ready). My follicle count is included below.

• 1 - 18.0
• 1 - 17.5
• 1 - 16.5
• 3 - 16.0
• 1 - 15.5
• 4 - 15.0
• 3 - 14.5
• 3 - 14.0
• 2 - 13.5
• 1 - 13.0
• 1 - 12.5
• 2 - 12.0
• 4 - 11.5
• 1 - 11.0

This all means ..... drum roll please ..... another ultrasound and bloodwork in the morning as I had guessed. Ultrasound is at 7 am, bloodwork immediately after. It's our guess that I will go in on Monday for the harvest which would make my transfer on Thursday, however, this has not been confirmed yet.

Stay tuned ...

8:39 and home

The morning events are over. Blood word at 7, oatmeal and a bannana in the employee cafeteria with JB, and then an ultrasound. They are getting more and more painful but still not as bad as last time. I have even more follicles and they are getting even bigger. I, personally don't think they are big enough but only my phone call at 2:00 will tell me that. Our current guess is another morning tomorrow just like this one and then, hopefully, harvest on Monday. Will post again later this afternoon.

Again, I am feeling very ready and at peace but just so physically drained. I looked at myself in the mirror this morning and was not happy with what I saw -- I look like I was up all night, and I slept all night. Oh well. It's worth it!

Wendi

What elsen can I title this except: IVF Update

Last night: Gonal F (150 units in the gut)
Last night: Meformin (1000 units oral)
Last night: Slept very well. 9:00-6:00am (only woke up once with foot cramp!)
This morning: Lupron (10 units in the thigh)
This morning: Blood draw (7:00am)
This morning: Ultrasound (7:50am)
Need prayer for: I am doing great emotionally. My migraines are also doing pretty well. Haven't had a full blown one this IVF. The biggest thing I am dealing with currently is "weariness". I am feeling very tired and uncomfortable. If you could pray that I get a second wind for the fourth quarter, that would be awesome.
Report to the blog: I'll get it on here ASAP
John is doing: Great of course. He's a rockstar!

If I had to guess what my report would be as of today, I would say ultrasound today, ultrasound tomorrow (Saturday), harvest on Monday. But that's just our best-guess currently. Stay posted! I'll post again in a few hours.

IVF Update

Okay so I know these numbers don't mean much to you but here they are anyways.

My estradiol today was about 966. (Again they like it around 2000 for IVF). Yesterday was 600 so it jumped considerably. This is probably why it was 2 a.m. before I fell asleep. I did not feel good at all!

Here are how my follicles are looking:

• 1 size 15
• 1 size 14.5
• 4 size 13.5
• 8 size 13
• 1 size 12.5
• 2 size 12
• 1 size 11.5

So, 18 follicles all around 12-15. Size 20 or so is considered mature. This means that we are getting close. I am taking another 150 units of Gonal tonight and have a blood draw and ultrasound tomorrow. When these follicles get closer to the 18 or 19 range, we will be good-to-go.

I will, of course, keep you posted. It looks like the earliest I will go is Monday right now.

Celebrating Life

[Disclaimer: at the end of this post I have included some photos of pregnancy/kids. I have provided some extra space after my text so my infertility-pals can read the blog and then leave if the photos are too difficult. Thanks!]

It is 12:25 AM. :) I shouldn't be up. And I shouldn't be blogging. But after nearly an hour and a half of tossing and turning, I wandered out of my bed and into the office. I am so bloated and uncomfortable it is nearly impossible to lie down nonetheless sleep. However, after the frustration wears away, I will try to sleep on Kelsey's futon -- where I can prop my legs up to the side and attempt to get comfortable. But for now, a tour of my heart.

I've been blog-hopping a bit. The little story of dear little Eliot continues to bless me. As the first child of this dear couple whom I have never met, I feel their hearts. The strong desire to be a parent is so real in so many people's lives. You should stop in again on Eliot's blog. 99 days of life. 99 balloons released to celebrate each and every day. What a blessing! What heartache. All rolled into one.

As for me, my heart is truly at peace. I am amazed that I can honestly say that I have found peace. I pray each day that that peace continues to hold me and comfort me. For those of you who have followed my journey from the beginning, I'm sure you know how difficult those words are. For those of you who are intimately involved, who have sat on the other side of a couch or a telephone and cried with me, sobbed with me, you understand even more how painful this journey has been and how amazing it is for me to tell you I have found peace.

I cannot promise that there will not be moments of sadness or frustration or doubt in the future. But what I can say is that I know this place I have found, is a place I can come back to time and time again.

What changed? The only way I can explain it is to tell you that when JB was on his camping trip, I gave my womb to the Lord. I truly told Him that the pain was too great to bear. I could no longer feel this way. If I was going to continue to feel this way, I needed to go home to heaven because the pain was that great. I wasn't suicidal, but as I told JB later, if a big truck would have hit me, I'd feel blessed to no longer feel so sad.

I'm sure some of you can relate. Friends who are longing for a dream that feels so unreachable. You know who you are. Friends who are waiting with aching hearts for unanswered prayers to come true. That pain is very real.

During this time I had great compassion for people who are mentally ill. For people who suffer with depression. For people who attempt suicide. Their hearts must hurt so badly! And if their heart hurt any worse than mine, I can see why they thought ending it was better.

But what I realized during those dark days was that the Lord was with me. I pictured it like a little girl walking with her father. As they hike along a trail, the little girl falls. She cries. She is hurt. The father did not want her to fall. He was there with her when she fell, but nonetheless, she fell. So what does he do? He picks her up. He gives her advice for how to prevent that fall in the future. He may even carry her if the pain is too much He did not want her to fall, and he may have tried to prevent her fall, but the fall happened nonetheless. But that doesn't mean the father turned his back.

During those five dark days as I tossed and turned in my bed by myself each night, struggled to get out of bed, struggled to eat, struggled to go on, I realized that I could not go on like this, and I told the Lord exactly that. I told Him I needed a purpose. I told Him I needed His strength. I gave Him my womb. He could have it. He could use me as he saw fit. I'd answer His call on my life. But He just had to bring me comfort. I couldn't survive another day like this nonetheless another month, another year, or another three years!

And in an instant, He gave that to me. I realized that there were things I would find peace with. I pictured myself doing mission work, side-by-side with JB. Mothering children who had no mothers. Hugging women who had no husbands. Crying with women who lost their children. Could I be content there? Could I be content there with no children?

I could.

And then, wonder of all wonders, JB came home. I was anxious to share my new insights with him, but I didn't know where to start. How did I explain that my entire perspective had changed? That the bitterness was crumbling. That I was okay. That I would be okay. Even if something were to happen to JB and it was just me (a huge fear of mine), I realized that God defined me. Children and a husband and "things" did not define me. What an unbelievable weight to have lifted off of me. For the first time since I was first diagnosed in 2003, I had peace.

To my amazement, as I began to talk to JB, I realized that while he was camping, the Lord had been showing him the same things in different ways. JB already knew that children might add to our joy, but they would not define our joy. However, he had been showing JB that He had a bigger purpose than just medicine. What an unbelievable blessing from the Lord. God was there. What a better way to show me that than to have my husband and I on the same page, though a state and a dense thickness of woods away.

I share all this to just share my heart. I have not hidden my heart. Life is full of blessings and heartache, but through it all, I know the Lord is walking beside me. I feel Him walking beside me. And I know that no matter how this next cycle works, He will carry me.

I also realized that I can find happiness in the happiness of others. Below are some pictures of my goddaughter Logan and her mom, Kristi. Kristi may be mad that I include a pregnant picture of her on my blog, but I really don't care. Kristi called me days and weeks into this pregnancy sure she was having a miscarriage. Everyone thought that this baby would never make it. But now, this little Raylee is only a month and a half from entering the world! What a miracle! What a miracle Logan and Raylee are. I am so blessed to be Logan's godmother and to share in this family. And I am so blessed to know that I can be okay as a godmother and friend and wife and find definition in the Lord, not the children I long to have. I can find definition with Him alone.

Blessings friends! Enjoy the photos. I go in for blood work and an ultrasound early tomorrow morning. Errr. early THIS morning. (I must get some sleep.) Tune back in for updates. I'll put them on the blog as soon as they become available. (P.S. Logan's band aid on her forehead is from a dive she took off the deck! She is definitely her mother's daughter -- fearless. It's one of the things I have always admired about Kristi and what made her kick my butt in basketball.)

[Disclaimer: at the end of this post I have included some photos of pregnancy/kids. I have provided some extra space so my infertility-pals can read the blog and then leave if they don't want to see the photos. Thanks!]

Appointment Update

Okay, well it's been an interesting day.

I woke up this morning just feeling very "bloated" and "crampy". I thought this was a little early in the IVF journey to be feeling this uncomfortable. I am walking at half-speed, sitting at half-speed, standing at half speed. I'm starting to look twice my age in the speed of my movements.

So I went in for my blood work at 7 then headed up to work. I sat down at my desk and realized, "JB never gave me my shot this morning!" Called John. Could he bring the meds with him when he came in? Maybe. But where do a husband and wife go to take a shot in her thigh? So John said I had to come home to get my shot. Home I go. Too bad it wasn't an evening shot. (Those are in my stomach. I can show my belly for crying out loud.)

So back to work by 8. I then think there was then some confusion with my results. I think because JB is now "working" there, they didn't put my results on the phone-in message board. I finally called the office at 4:45. There were my orders. But where was my message? So between the nurse and John I finally got to the bottom of things.

No wonder I am not feeling good. My numbers were in the 600's! Holy gashmoley. Last time when I went in for my first blood draw, my numbers were in the 100's. So, tomorrow morning more blood work (I start rotating arms at this point) and an ultrasound. (I know these estradial numbers confuse everyone but just keep in mind that a "mature follicle" emits about 150-200 on the estradial scale. However, to complicate matters, a 200 could mean 1 mature or 4 emitting 50. So the only way to really be sure is to do an ultrasound.)

Last harvest I went in on a Tuesday. This time it is my guess that I will go in earlier: Sunday or Monday. Let's see if I am right or not. Only time will tell. It appears I am progressing nicely. Nice and bloated!

Wow, this is moving fast! Look for more updates tomorrow of course. Don't worry, I'll keep you posted.

Oh and please keep the prayers coming. I am feeling emotionally AWESOME! Dealing with headaches and bloating but emotionally flying high.

Sunday Smiles

Sunday evening we had a few friends over for dinner. Dave and Lesley brought dessert. Tara brought fruit. Sam and Jackie brought drinks. And Hans brought the games.

Hans brought two games. One was the traditional Mexican Dominoes which is always great fun. The other is the obscure game I had never heard of or played before.

Basically, the idea is to get a carrot, tied to your waist, into a tiny jar. You time each other to see who can do it first. Here are some photos from the event. You will notice my photo is not on here. That is because, well, this is my blog, and if I felt like I looked like a complete idiot and didn't want other people to see, then I believe that is completely my prerogative. (Did you know the the word "perogitive" is actually not a word? It is actually prerogative and supposed to be pronounced as such. You learn something everyday!) Okay, back to the pictures. I won't share names of who is who, but Jackie was the winner!!!

All right, now for a few pictures that aren't as embarrassing. Well, at least they aren't as embarrassing as the pictures shown above.

Well maybe this picture is embarrassing. This picture of Hans and Tara cracks me up. I don't know who is funnier, Hans making a face like something smells or Tara doing I don't know what. I love this picture!

And here is just a sweet picture of Sam and Jackie!

In other news, I go in for my first blood of work at 7:00 this morning. This will tell them how I am responding to the drugs. This Gonal I take, as I have mentioned before is a very, very expensive drug. JB told me today that I shouldn't complain about taking 225 once a day (which in comparison to some of my friends, is a lot.) He said he has learned on REI that women can have to take much more -- up to 300 two times a day! I cannot even possibly calculate how much this would cost. My only guess is $600 a day! (Or $300 a day with Mayo's insurance.) This was unfathomable to me. I will not complain anymore.

I also went to my next acupuncture appointment last night. I was much more relaxed this time and seemed to get much more out of the appointment. He really helped with my headaches as well with an addition eastern medicine "massaging" technique. Quite fascinating.