Three weeks

Hard to believe I know, but our little Elijah is three weeks old today.

In celebration of his third week in the world, JB moved back into the bedroom with us last night, forgoing the uninterrupted sleep offered by the couch.

As we laid next to each other in our bed last night, JB remarked that the last three weeks have seemed more like three years. I had to agree. While it is difficult to believe that the baby we waited so long for is already nearing a month old, it is also hard to comprehend how much has occurred in our lives in such a short period of time.

But with time, comes experience. Experience for the entire family -- all the way down to the tiniest member.

Elijah's first week in the world was a difficult one for all of us. Not only was I trying to breastfeed while in a tremendous amount of pain, but Elijah was getting anxious for my milk to come in. In addition, we found out a few days after his birth that our little guy had two nasty sores on the tops of both his feet. These were "pressure ulcers" created by whoever put the tape around his feet designed to hold his security tag in place at the hospital. While we didn't make a big deal of this, they did take some pictures of his feet when we were being discharged in hopes that people could learn from the mistake made. We just didn't want another little baby to have this happen.

Once that tape came off and Mom started feeling better and we were able to move to our own home with our own baby stuff, Elijah quickly began to settle. Those powerful lungs that we heard nearly continually in the hospital, began to see usage on a more limited basis.

Now, three weeks into life, Elijah has decided that waking up once a night is sufficient -- a great blessing to his still-recovering Mom. We feed right around 10pm, again around 3am, and then again around 6am. Not too bad at all. Of course, Mom recognizes that schedules are subject to change, but she is still incredibly thankful that Elijah has been following this pattern for about five days in a row, creating hope that any subsequent changes will only result in more sleep for Mom.

Many moms have told me that the moment you hold your little baby for the first time, you are hooked for life. I have to admit that both with Isaac and Elijah, I didn't have that instant "forever-connection." For me, it seems to take a little bit of time for the two of us to get to know each other. For me to feel comfortable being their caretaker. For me to really feel like their Mom. I used to feel shy in admitting this, but I've never been too shy to be honest, and I didn't want to start now. It wasn't that I didn't love both my boys as soon as they were born. I loved them tremendously. It's just that it took me a bit of time to truly feel that they were mine, that they were going to be mine forever, and that I was going to be their Mom for life.

For Isaac, that connection seemed to solidify itself on our trip to Minnesota about six weeks after he was born. It was during that horrible delayed-overnight and loss-of-luggage-trip that I really felt like Isaac and I connected. I suddenly realized that I was his Mom. I was in charge of every single thing he did. I was the one making every decision on his behalf. He and I were going to be a team for a long time.

It has been during the last few days, that that Mom-son connection has really begun to take place with Elijah. I am now able to understand his cries and his needs. I don't feel like I am guessing at what he is wanting so much anymore. I feel like I am his Mom. I feel like I know him and know what he needs, at least most of the time. That is a good feeling.

I'm not sure if I am alone in the amount of time it has taken me to feel "in the mom groove" with both of my boys. With Isaac, I worried about how long it was taking me to feel like his Mom. With Elijah, I really didn't worry about it as this was my second time around, and I knew the groove would find itself.

As for our days, the extra set of hands (currently Joan's) allows me some extra luxuries. I am able to take a good nap most days. I am able to have help with diapers and feeding Isaac. While enjoying these luxuries, I am also aware that these angel-guests will not be present for an incredible amount of time and so I am constantly trying to plan out how I would handle a certain situation if faced with it by myself. What do I do if Isaac wakes up for the morning while I am in the middle of feeding Elijah? What if Elijah decides it is time to eat while I am giving Isaac a bath? How do I make sure that Isaac is playing safely when Elijah decides it is time for me to change his diaper? I am quietly taking all of this in while enjoying the fact that I don't currently have to navigate these potential land mines -- trying to plan ahead for how I will do things when it is just me.

I've also realized that humor will be a key weapon to my sanity. One of these funny stories came through Joan. While we have a changing area in our bedroom set up for Elijah, we do occasionally change him in the nursery -- especially when I am napping in the bedroom. It is for this reason that I have stashed a few newborn diapers on the corner of Isaac's changing table. Isaac's size 4 diapers are located in a diaper bag off the side of the changing table. Joan, however, didn't know this. The first time she changed Isaac, she grabbed one of the newborn diapers. She would remark later that it seemed a bit on the small side, but she figured that we were the parents and we knew what we were doing. Isaac however probably thought this newbie was quite confused. It was only later, when she changed Elijah and I told her of my stash of newborn diapers, that Joan realized what she had done and admitted that Isaac had spent the morning in his little brother's diaper. John gave her a hard time about "trying to put his son in a thong" and we all had a great laugh (and are still laughing) at the thought of our chubby Isaac wearing a NB size diaper! ;)

I also managed to laugh yesterday when little Elijah officially cristened me as his Mom. We all know that little boys seem to enjoy a good urination when their diaper is removed. But Elijah hadn't seemed to want to participate in this activity. At least he didn't want to participate until his bath, when he shot a solid stream right over JB's shoulder and onto the kitchen floor. I should have taken that as a warning, but I attributed it to the warm bath water, and did not take proper precautions.

Yesterday, Joan handed me a diaper and a wipe while I was sitting on the couch, and I decided to change my little boy while he was lying on my lap. Yes, you guessed it. Elijah chose that moment to decide that he would be a typical little boy. What timing. Of course, the story would be even funnier if he decided to cristen me in another bodily fluid way at the time same. Since I avoid extreme talk of bodily fluids on my blog, I'll leave that part to your imagination as I am sure your mind can paint it nearly identical to how it happened. Needless to say all my clothes went into the laundry and I went into the shower.

As the start of our fourth week in the world begins, here are a few pictures to celebrate our miracle(s):