Add to it the ballet, house renovations, and a husband with a bad back, and that's my tipping point.
I know it's good to be positive. I know it's good to not get negative. I know it's good to keep things in perspective.
And I didn't do any of that.
John told me that I am looking around and seeing fires when in fact there are simply some little sparks here and there. I know that's true. I hear what he's saying. And yet I still sometimes just can't see straight because I get so overwhelmed.
Today I reached out to a few friends to ask them to pray for me. I shared what was burdening me. The list included:
- JB was going on a mother run of shifts, and we needed to get all three of our main animal groups moved this morning.
- JB's back is bothering him meaning I have to take more of a load on these moves.
- The kids have schoolwork to get done for the day.
- Our housekeeper was coming that morning which meant I had to get some things prepared for her arrival.
- I had a clean clothes pile in the hallway of my bedroom that was still waiting to find a home.
- We are hoping to get started on our home within the next few weeks, and I have to get our entire upstairs emptied.
- When they start working on the house, they will start upstairs. This means that until it is done, we will live all six of us in our master bedroom.
- I have no idea where to put everything! I mean I am already putting things in the garage and the camper and the woofer area. But we have a lot of things we need every day to live! How do you fit six people's clothes in a closet designed for two people?
- Abigail had a regular ballet practice today at 3:45pm
- It was my job to cook dinner.
- My in-laws weren't around for the day.
- The boys' bedroom was an absolute disaster.
- I'm taking piano lessons and hadn't practiced at all this week.
- We have two more full day ballet rehearsals and then four shows in the next six days!!!
Okay so that's just a quick overview of what was flying through my mind this morning. I kept trying to talk myself down off the cliff. It wasn't as bad as I thought, was it? But I just couldn't wrap my head around it. My poor husband was watching me lose my mom-mind, and trying to encourage me, but I wasn't very encourage-able.
That's when I asked my friends to pray. And somehow, the day actually went better than I hoped. We got our ewes, rams, and pigs moved in about 2.5 hours. I was back at the house by noon. We scrapped any school work for the day. I skipped ballet practice. We had leftovers for dinner. And I gave the laundry to two kids as a punishment. I just forgot about the boys' room for the day. Ha! When my in-laws got back late that afternoon, I willingly let them take all the kids for an hour so I could just regroup.
I truly believe that when I reach out for prayer, even when I am not really praying myself, I am held up.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, remember ... REACH OUT! Ask for prayer. Ask for help. Don't be alone. Don't feel alone. We are not alone!