Parenting ...

 ... teenagers isn't hard just because they are teenagers. (But that is hard!)

It's also hard because our own history, and our own struggles come back to the surface.

I'm a people pleaser. I like people to like me. I don't like conflict. But what about my child? What about when they are facing conflict with someone? How will I handle it? Will I thrust those emotions onto them? Even subtly? What messages am I conveying? How do I make sure that I let them fight their own battles and that their battles can be fought correctly and the way that they need to best fight them.

I've been, fairly obsessed, with the earthquake in Turkey. It has really affected me. How much is too much to share with them? I am sad. Is it okay to let them know I am sad? Is it okay to watch more videos than I should of rescues and let them watch them too? At what point has my own concern crossed over onto them?

I understand how parents just "let things go." Not letting things go is so exhausting. Fighting the little things. The slight disrespect. The slight rudeness. The slight bit of unkind language. It'd be easier just to let them do their own things and not worry about the little things.

But to raise a human is one of the greatest callings in all of the world. I want to do it right. I don't want to mess it up. I want to give my children the best chance I can at them being amazing humans who love Jesus.

So I do the best I can ... and lean on my solid husband who isn't as emotional as I am to help in a lot of ways. To help lead. Especially the boys. There is so much about being a boy and a man that I just don't understand. Anyone who tries to say that boys and girls are the same and that raising them is the same? They should really try being in a home with two of each. They are just different!

And I only have half of them to "teenager-hood!"