Christmas Dinner & New Outfit

Finally I managed a picture of me in one of my new outfits that I bought on my shopping outting in Angra (which I wrote about on this post.) 

 

I had also written another blog post upon which I asked for advice about what I should wear to an event that was business casual / semi-formal. I opted for this sweater dress -- a color I never usually wear and a style I have never worn. In fact, it's a very European-style. I paired it with leggings and boots. (You can sort of see that in the last picture.)

 

 

 

The kids stayed with Aunt Connie, and JB and I headed out for a Christmas dinner gathering with his medical group. It was a wonderful evening. The room was beautiful decorated and a lot of thought and planning and been put in to making it a very beautiful and sophisticated evening. I ended up feeling "just perfectly" dressed -- fitting right in the middle of what everyone was wearing.

Very happy with my outfit and out wonderful night out.

News (all having to do with Connie)

It's been awhile since I bullet pointed the facets of our lives. Here are some random facts that might be interesting for people to know, and, somehow, they all are connected to Connie in some way.

• Connie just celebrated two months on the island, and her presence has been a perfect fit for our family. She helps me 30-40 hours a week, and has already been starting to do a lot of other work for people organizing and pet sitting. Between us and her other jobs, she is becoming one very busy lady! Not only does she help watch the kids for me whenever I need her and provide me with an extra set of eyes throughout the day, but she also is "in charge" of laundry and the kitchen. What an amazing blessing this is! I think most moms would agree that the two household tasks they have the hardest time keeping up on are laundry and dishes and so to have someone basically taking care of those aspects, is incredibly freeing. Connie is especially around to help me from lunch time until dinner time -- some of the longest hours in a stay-at-home-mom's day. 
• Some fix-it men recently spent two days removing the elevator from our house. I still have no idea why they took it off or if they are planning on putting it back. What I do know is that having construction men in your house six to eight hours a day while you are trying to get three kids to take naps has been a real pain. I can't go anywhere or do anything when they are here, I have to keep Scrubs from barking, and the kids, especially Abigail, are constantly getting woken up. After two full days of elevator removing, they asked me when they could return next week. As I was trying to find a time that would work, they reminded/informed me that they would need three more full days to complete the task! I was so proud of myself when I said, "I'm sorry. This just won't work for my family." Following my Aunt's suggestion, I instead said, "You are going to have to come when  we are out of town later in December." They acquiesced willingly and will now coordinate with Connie, who is house sitting while I am gone. I am so proud of myself for doing what is best for me during this time of my life -- instead of trying to please people, which is what I usually do.
• Some of you have expressed concern with Connie being alone over the holidays. This is something we knew was going to happen before she got here, and trust me, she will be far from alone. She already has a community of people in Porto Martins who know and love her, and with her other jobs, I have a feeling that the three weeks is going to go by way too fast on her end! While I know she will miss us, I definitely know she is looking forward to a little time to not have five extra people in the house. And Scrubs will be here with her. Not only are he and Connie extremely close (like ... very!), but Scrubs is a great guard dog. You definitely feel safer with his presence. When the elevator man showed up with a crowbar yesterday, he definitely made sure the guy know he better use that bar for the elevator and not on his people. 
• We are currently working on getting Connie an extension for her VISA. She is given 90 days in the country without question and without cost. However, after that, she has to apply to get a 90 day extension for her VISA. And after 180 days, no extension is permitted. She must leave the country to return, get another free VISA, and then request another VISA extension. In other words, she can stay in the country 180 days before having to leave and then can return and stay another 180 days. She is currently planning on being here one year (or 360 days). Our friend Luis, who is Portuguese and works in the office that handles VISA "stuff" is helping us complete this task. We are very hopeful that it will all come together successfully as her first 90 day VISA expires on December 24th. We are also still trying to figure out where we will send her at the 180 day mark. We thought we could just pop her over to Spain, but that's in the EU (European Union). It has to be somewhere out of the EU to get a new VISA. She'll have to not only leave the country but also the EU So most likely, we'll probably look to send her somewhere like London so she can get a mini vacation and see somewhere brand new while she is at it.

So that's an update .... Connie style.

Welcome to our family Aunt Connnie!

I thought it might be a good time to "introduce" my aunt a bit more to my blog readers. Truthfully, I needed to wait until she was here while before I did this because, well, I didn't really know my aunt that well before she got here.

She wasn't a stranger, of course. But it had been quite a long time since we had seen each other. I remembered who she had been. But I had no idea who she was now!

 

My mother is the oldest of five siblings -- all of them having been born and raised in the Chicago suburbs. Diane (my mom), then Janet, Paul, Danny, and Connie. Connie is approximately ten years younger than my mother, and being as my mom was 21 when she had me, Connie was just a teenager when I was born.

My parents relocated to Southern Florida right after they were married in 1975. In 1977 I was born. In 1979 my brother was born. In 1981 my parents attempted a move back to Illinois. My dad's four brothers were starting an aluminum siding, and he decided to join them, only to discover that while the business was successful, supporting four families had been a bit too lofty. They returned to Florida a year later.  

Once I was old enough to fly by myself, I would spend many summers with "Cool Aunt Connie" at her home in Illinois -- bouncing around between her home and that of my dad's five brothers and sisters and my mom's four.

Connie was married to Mike. They had two sons: first Casey and then Colin, just as I was leaving my teenage years and transitioning to high school, and honestly, that is the last time I remember seeing my aunt -- when her boys were very young. She and her family (and my grandpaernts) relocated to Michigan. And so, while JB and I still made frequent trips to Chicago when we lived in Kentucky and then Minnesota, we never made it as far north as Petoskey, Michigan.

 

However, while it's been years since we have seen each other in person, we've stayed in touch via technology and through other family members. I've followed her life. She's followed mine. But being together in person is a whole new game.

 

And it'sa game that has gone fantastically! Connie is funny, incrediby down-to-earth, and very real both to herself and with those around her. We have a lot in common, and definitely have the same blood running through us when it comes to quite a few things. She likes to write. Loves to exercise. Is silly and honest at all costs.

 

She says she is not a real "kid" person, but my three have taken to her with no hesitation. And while she says kids aren't her thing, she is a dog l-o-v-e-r. Dogs are her thing, and she and Mr. Scrubby immediately became best friends.

 

Connie started a blog upon her arrival in the Azores. You can keep up with her by clicking here.

 

On her last post, she did a little "intro" to each of my children: what she has observed in three weeks here. Here is what she came up with:

 

Scrubs: Mr Scrubby, their 4 yr. old Dalmation who definitely needs one-on-one frisbee or rings time each day.

 

Isaac: He is quiet and peaceful. He is very private and expresses his acceptance of me almost secretively when there is lots happening around us - I will secretly hold out my hand and he will secretly place his hand in mine and hold it for several minutes, or I'll feel a little ones hands wrap around the back of my leg - if I look @ him (when nobody's paying attention), we exchange a smile and that's kind of our "language" of affection. When the rest of the family is going downstairs and I'm up on the 2nd or 3rd floor, he sometimes prefers to stay w/me where he/we quietly play w/toys, but few words. And he laughs outloud when I sing, "Because, because, because, BECAUSE - because of the wonderful things he does!". He calls me Aunt Twonnie.

 

Sidge: Mr. Sidge (real name Elijah, but insists on Sidge (what Isaac called him before he could pronounce Elijah). He is a very passionate age 3 - goes from 0 to 10 of any given emotion very quickly. He was immediate and open w/his affectionate hugs and always, "I'm so glad Auntie Connie is w/us (living, going with on an excursion, etc. etc.), b'cuz I love her!" He reminds me of Tigger in the Winnie The Pooh series - bouncey, happy, always moving fast.

 

ABIGAIL: Abigail watched me for nearly a week...touched me here and there, smiled or laughed w/me. By yesterday or the day before, she dove from Wendi's arms to mine! We have our own "thing" - no matter what's going on, initiated by either one of us, we just stop and point @ each other...and lots of grins ensue. She is the spittin' image, personality wise of Wendi when she was a toddler - pretty much commands whatever room she walks into. Her mommie is still that way and it's delightful! Once you've made it into her club, she is very cuddly and so engaging and funny. She doesn't have her words yet, other than Mama and Dada - but has sign language of "please" "more" and "all done". Keep her fed and entertained and everything's right with the world - you don't and everything's wrong. That's just the way it is!

I really thought she nailed each of my children perfectly.

Connie has taken over the apartment on the third floor. If you want to see pictures of her two rooms (living room and bedroom), you can click here. Outside of her little sweet is a half bath that she will share with whatever guests might be in town. They will have the choice of two bedrooms on the other half of the third floor.

The first two weeks were more observational in nature. But this past week she has watched Abigail solo. No small feat as little miss Abigail is quite an opinionated little lady. She was also going to watch the boys for me when I went to Germany. Which, obviously, did not happen. Now that she has settled in, she is really helping me M-F from 2-7pm. Those are the times we feel our family most needs help. She is also taking over the entire responsibility of the dishes and the laundry. Heaven help me!

I felt some guilt (and still do) for having Connie to come here and help me. But the truth is, things are different than when our parents were children. Families used to live by each other. Extended families were available to help.

But JB and I are living in a remote location -- with no family anywhere near us. Can we do this without Connie? Yes. But we would have to make some decisions: like hiring a babysitter a day or two a week so that I can run errands on Base or so that he and I can take an evening out together. Our boys do not qualify to attend presschool here unless we were to put them in the Portuguese preschool.

When we added up the cost of hiring sitters for those times or putting the kids in preschool, we realized that it would be a deal for us to fly Connie here and pay for her food. We would make out in this deal. It's a similar situation to the one in which Veronica came to live with us. No money changes hands. What changes hands is a love for children and an opportunity for Connie to experience the world while helping make our life easier.

Connie had prayed that the Lord would lead her to where He wanted her next to go. And He lead her to us. She has no idea where she is headed after her year with us. Maybe more time with us? Who knows? But the Lord is full of cool plans, and we are wide open to what they might be.

For now, we are so blessed by the extra person here to help us love our children. I am done with guilt. Some moms can do it all. They don't need help. I do. I can do it without help, but I am a better mom when I have it.

Here are a few more pictures of our new family member via Facebook.

In the Garden

Aunt Connie loves to garden! While she is admittedly not sure what she is doing, she is a quick study, and JB is glad to have her as a pupil! There's a lot of garden to cover at our home ... and goodness knows I won't be getting into it anytime soon.

 

These flowers are popping up everywhere! I just found out that they are called "Girls going to school" in Portuguese because they are pink and they show up in September. Seriously, it is like they show up overnight!

Connie and Nadine

The best news shall be the first news. Finally, this morning, at 4:30am, my Aunt Connie arrived on the island of Terceira. She's jet lagged, of course, but happy to be done travelling. And the kids and Scrubby have already made her feel right at home. The boys were so excited when they got out of bed and saw that she was finally here. Scrubs took to her immediately, getting on his back and opting for some belly rubs. And Abigail, after a few hours of play this morning, actually let Connie hold her! No small feat from our particular little lady.

 

Connie's plan is not set in stone. We do know that she will be here for the foreseeable future. Most likely until next Summer. It may be longer. Could possibly be shorter. But it's enough to mean she's moving in! She was ready for a change in her life. Ready to see the world and do something new. Her boys are now both independent and on their own. And she's not the type of mom to hover and keep them in the nest. So now, she is spreading her wings and taking flight! I'm so proud of her for taking a chance on us and the life we live here. And I am also so thankful to the Lord for orchestrating this relationship.

 

I haven't seen my aunt in many years. Honestly, maybe 15 years or more! Imagine that! But I was very close to her when I was younger, and while we have a lot to catching up to do, it's obvious that our hearts still know each other very well.

 

The Lord has given her a be-uuuuu-tiful first day on the island. The prettiest day we have had in weeks. That pesky Tropical Storm Nadine hovered around here for a long time, and then, and here's where the other part of my news stems from, she's heading back this way! I kid you not. After taking a breather for a day and a half as a post-tropical cyclone, Nadine became a tropical storm again over the far eastern Atlantic on Sunday. And it's looking like she is planning on returning to a hurricane again and possibly causing us some real issues over here on the islands.

 

I love a good thunderstorm. And since Nadine was only a tropical storm when it came by us, and it wasn't even coming directly at us, we thought it would be just a good ol' fashioned rain storm! Who doesn't like one of those? Well, I'll tell you what. When you are living on a tiny island in the middle of the ocean, a good ol' thunderstorm is an entirely different being. It was scary and I didn't like it. Our garden took a beating too. So I'm not interested in Nadine coming anywhere near this island again thank you very much!



Constance



My Aunt Constance "Connie" with her son Colin.

I am constantly amazed at how cool God is.

In the fall of 2010, I found out that I was once again pregnant. Having thought Elijah was a “one-time-thing” we were blown away that another miracle had occurred. But we were also just a bit overwhelmed. We had one big dog, two toddlers, and, oh, yeah, we lived halfway across the world from all of our friends and family – in Turkey of all places.

So imagine my surprise when within twenty-four hours of discovering a new life was on the way, I received an out-of-the-blue Facebook message from Veronica Ray. She was 19 now, but we had known her since she was just a little girl. Now, she had just graduated high school and was looking to explore the world. More joking than serious, she put a comment on one of my photos, “Hey Wendi. Want a nanny?” I messaged back a follow-up. Are you serious? She wasn’t but now I had her attention.

I told her my secret. Baby Kitsteiner #3 was on the way. Help!!!!

Over the next few weeks, we came up with a plan. We’d pay her ticket to Turkey and let her live with us and eat with us if she’d help me with the kids. She could make money doing other work for other people but no money would actually exchange hands between us. It was wonderful! She got to see the world, and I had a “family member” there to help me with what turned out to be a very difficult year. From an appendicitis to going into early labor to having to live in Germany for two and a half months – I truly do not know how we could have done it without her.

But God knew. Isn’t He cool? He brought along something I needed before I even knew I needed it.

And He’s moved for our family again.

When we saw our home in the Azores, JB and I immediately discussed the prospect of a Veronica-like-arrangement again. We had the space here. Maybe another very special person would want to come and help us. As we saw it, to go out once a week (which we would love to but don’t do) would cost us about $50 each week for a babysitter. Four times a month is $200. For six months that is $1200. I’d rather pay for someone’s plane fare and have them with me a lot more than hire some local person to watch my kids. Financially it just made sense.

But Veronica had moved on to other things and was no longer available. Did we want to look for someone else? I shook my head and told JB, “I’m not up for finding anyone to come and live with us. If God has someone in mind, He’ll need to bring them my way and drop them in my lap.”

And once again, He did. I can’t even remember how the communication began. I think it was me who threw it out to my Aunt Connie. “Want to be a nanny?” yet again on Facebook. She replied in the affirmative. But we both didn’t think the other was being serious. I’m not sure I was. I definitely didn’t think she’d be interested.

But she was.

My mother is the oldest of five children. My aunt Connie is the youngest of those children. She was only 14 when I was born. When I was much younger, I would often go to visit family in the Illinois area and spend a lot of time with my aunt. But once I went to college, we lost touch. We sent occasional cards or emails but nothing much. In the meantime, she moved to Petoskey, Michigan. And I was all over the world. No time to run in the same direction. Connie and Mike are no longer married but their two sons live close by – Casey in Grand Rapids and Colin in Petoskey where he works as a lumberjack! (He’s a really strong guy so I’ve been told!) With Colin’s graduation from high school last year, Connie’s heart had begun to stir with the desire for some adventure.

And my heart had been desiring to stir with the need for family.

I’m sure it goes without saying that we miss our families something bad. I miss having a Grama that can watch them for an afternoon. I miss birthday parties with aunts and uncles in attendance. We do not regret our decision to live in Turkey or the Azores. We often remind ourselves that we “chose our little family over our big family.” In other words, if we went to Turkey … if we went to the Azores … JB would most likely not deploy. But it would mean being away from family for a very long period of time.

I hate that my parents won’t see Abigail until she is walking. I want my boys to spend time with JB’s mom and dad. But right now, that isn’t where our life is.

That being said, I am so thrilled to have family here with me. Connie is coming in late September. The initial plan is for her to stay at least six months. We’ll reevaluate at that point whether she will stay longer.

Her arrival caps off quite a run of visitors. My friend Nicole (JB’s classmate from medical school) and her daughter Hannah come in this weekend for a few days. In mid-August, JB’s parents are coming into town for three weeks. And then Connie will be here a few days after they leave. (She is a huge dog person too which is a great bonus!)

Anyways, just wanted to share my very exciting news with those of you who read my blog. I am so blessed that she is coming. Blessed that I will have someone here that will allow me to go for a run, run some errands, or run and take a shower. Do I need the help? No. I can do it without her. But will it make my marriage and mothering much better? It definitely will. Her presence will allow us to spend time together as a couple and allow my kids to have an auntie here that loves them.

I can’t wait!

I also found this picture: check this out! That's Joni with my aunt Connie (middle) and my Aunt Linda (my dad's youngest sister). This picture was probably taken when I was just a baby.