Listen to your body

 

The learning going on inside of me is INTENSE. And, while Wendi has changed considerably, I will always be a passionate person. I'll continue to be that passionate person. I'll continue to share. 

In fact, while I was going through this, there was a part of me that said: "Maybe God wouldn't have needed me to do this if I wasn't such a big sharer. He probably needed me to help someone on the other side."

I knew that whatever I went through, I would be an open book. And I would be willing to walk alongside anyone that needed me. 

Within my limits of course.

That's the thing I am SO aware of. My limits. What my body is capable of doing. As an athlete, I never listened to my body. Not really. You are trained to push the body through its limits and then go a little more. (I mean, I played basketball on a stress fracture for over six weeks before I finally fessed up to my trainer about the pain in my leg.)

But my body wasn't able to sustain. It isn't able to sustain what people everyday in every way are putting their bodies through. And eventually, the body WILL crack. It will die. It will collapse. It will explode with anger. It will avoid. It will get anxious. It cannot keep up the pace.

So will you listen to it?

To your body?

I didn't. Until it forced me to listen. I had NO choice. I couldn't function. That's a hard place to get to. A place of not being able to even completely care for yourself. 

I wrote this in my journal a few days ago:

I am observing so intensely that what I put my thinking or energy into, immediately translates into how my body physically feels. I can even feel it when I go to text someone. If it is about a heavy topic, I feel it in my body. My stomach sometimes and then, if it is anxiety, it is like a dribble through the veins of my arms. I have to very intentionally choose where to put my energy. I think my body always carried this weight, however, I masked it with meds or just an athlete's mentality. 

Some people, of course, choose to self-medicate with drugs or food. I never did that. But I was putting a bandaid on this all the same.

And I think: what about you reading this? Are you listening to your body?!