Teenagers can be hard

...is H-A-R-D. 

I never, ever, ever dreamed that I would say: "Hannah is my easy one."

But she is. 

I don't want to dog my kids on social media and act like they aren't amazing little humans. Because, well, they are amazing little humans. 

I don't want to act like I don't appreciate their uniqueness and wonderfulness and amazingness. Because, well, I do appreciate those things.

But sometimes, I simply feel SO unappreciated. I feel like they really, truly, don't care a lick about me. And that I am simply here to make sure their lives go as smoothly as possible.

An example: I woke up at about 7:30am. I got a text from John (at work in the ER) saying that the turkeys probably needed moving sometime today. It's Sunday. I was planning on going to the late service (start time 10:30). Upon receipt of my husband's text, I decided that it might be smarter to go to the first service, get home, and do the turkey moving. I knew if we tried to do it before church, a lot can go wrong and we may not make it to church.

So I rolled over to a snuggling-with-me Abigail and told her to go get everyone getting ready for church. It's now nearing 8am. We have to be out the door by 8:30am for 9:00am start time. And I'm gonna go do ALL the animal chores while the kiddos eat and get dressed.

Somehow I did it. I did the super-fast-cheating-but-it-will-work way of caring for animals knowing that we could do a secondary-welfare check upon return home. 

• I raced out to the turkeys who are down in the forest garden and just made sure they had food and water to last a few hours (they did.) While out there, I was moving their shade shelter and the rope broke. I went flopping down on my back side. I then went around to the front to try and push it and the wood broke. I kid you not. One of those days. 
• I dumped a half-scoop of feed for each of our paddocks of big ducks (due to predation and newcomers to the farm we currently have one paddock with a male and female in it and one paddock with a male duck and a goose. Long story.)
• I half-way moved the Suskovitch-style style chicken tractor that is housing our new baby ducks and just topped off their water. This meant I didn't climb in and move everything around. I totally cheated, but it was good enough. I raced to the brooder to get them some food and yeast (ducks need this) and gave that to them too.
• I jumped in the four-wheeler with ol' Ritter along with me. He needed some exercise. We zipped over along the front road (we've had to give up using our back road due to erosion issues) to the chickens where I gave them four scoops of feed and opened them up for today.

I arrived back at home at 8:15 and managed to jump in the shower, throw on one of my quick Prana dresses, and even manage to put on a bit of mascara (the only make-up I find necessary). 

Okay so then we go to church. After church we stop to see JB (two of the kiddos are feeling a tad under the weather), and then get gas. We get home, and I now have to go BACK through all the animals and do them "better" then we left earlier.

Since one of the boys is not feeling great, the other boy and I go out to the turkeys. We decide not to officially "move" the turkeys, but instead get their next paddock ready and shrink down the size of their current paddock so they start hammering a new area. Turkeys are creatures of habit, and even though we've moved their shade shelter, they are still hanging out in the same area beating it down more and more.

I walk back to the house and begin working on cleaning the kitchen. As I walk back to the house, I tell boy that I am doing turkeys with that I will turn on the water for him as I head out. And I do.

In the midst of cleaning the kitchen, he comes back inside ... angry. And he's angry with me. I left him there and one of the lines to the electric wire snapped and it took longer to post the posts in then he thought. So he comes in the house mad at ME. Mad at me that I wasn't down there with him doing the job that his job that I am only helping him with because his brother doesn't feel good. Upset with me when I was outside doing all of the chores for everyone this morning.

I truly feel that I cannot win with teenagers. I am doing something wrong all the time. At least with toddlers, they thought I hung the moon just for sitting on the floor reading to them. Now, I am the bad guy even when I am not the bad guy.

It's hard!